"Waiting for Sleep"
By Ensign Kremer - Medical Officer

Location: Crew Quarters, USS Sulu
Stardate: 57910.20 01h00

***

Kremer sat quietly on his bed, blankets huddled around his furred form, his long grey and black tail wrapped snuggly around his waist. He sighed as he rested his chin atop his knees. It happened again, he was having trouble staying asleep again, it was not that Kremer had difficulties falling asleep, it was avoiding the nightmares that came back to him each time he fell asleep. They were more or less the same as always.

It was the same scene again in his mind, over and over again; he would come to Sickbay for his duties and not shortly after arriving he would find an Enforcer arguing with one of the Medical Staff over something small and trivial. They made a mistake they would be beaten. He would always try to step in to stop the fight but each the time the fight would end with him getting shoved to the ground and then the Enforcer would punish the Medical Staff by forcing them all to watch as he beat the nurse or officer who had made the mistake until the accused's hands were severed to bloody stumps.

It was all a dream but a horrifying dream nonetheless. Since the Windsor crew came aboard the ship and started to treat them like prisoners, he had been on his guard 24/7. The old Terran saying about being as nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs oddly seemed to fit his personality. Or at least to some degree or the very next. His cheerful demeanor left him, and though he talked amongst his fellow crewmembers and crewmates, it was small talk and nothing more. Perhaps it was his way of not wanting to see his dream come to life.

Wrapping his tail tightly around his waist, Kremer blinked his eyes as tears drifted from them down his furred features. He did not want to see any more people hurt, bludgeoned with painsticks like cattle when the Enforcers felt they need disciplining or worse yet befalling to the same fate that Shyla Moreau did that Sefton and Boothroyd were forced to take part in observing.

The whole idea of a Mirror Universe with alter egos of oneself greatly frightened him; he did not even wish to dare know what his alter ego was like or what duties he participated in. Was it possible that seeing as he himself was a healer in the Real Universe, that his alter ego was probably the exact and just like these other Enforcers? For all he knew he was probably a mad scientist who performed ghastly experiments on others whilst inflicting pain instead of taking pain away.

Sniffling, the Caitian looked up at the darkened ceiling in his quarters as though trying to find the answers in the darkness above him.

He hated this place, he wanted out as soon as possible. Letting out a sad howl the Caitian wept as he rested his head back onto his pillow. Sleep would come, its wait seemingly longer than that for the chance at finally being free of this dreadful universe.

---

"Night Calls"
By: Ensign Shirik Lektar, Operations
Senior Lieutenant Hadek - Windsor Security Enforcers

Location: Lektar's quarters, USS Sulu
Stardate: 57910.20, 02h00

***

Shirik sat in her darkened room on the sofa, a mug of klaas cradled in her hands. On the table, her meditation candle bathed the room in its soothing scent. She was still in uniform, but thinking about trying to get some sleep before shift. After she finished her klaas, she thought.

She'd been having trouble sleeping lately, and had begun to have disturbing dreams that she couldn't fully remember when she woke. As a result, she'd been going to bed later and getting less sleep. She contributed it to the stresses of this universe, the Enforcers, and the mission. Soon with luck it would be over, and they'd be back in their own universe. Then she'd be able to sleep.

Senior Lieutenant Hadek was a mean-spirited individual with a streak of pure malice and a black heart. He used people to further his own ends and he despised anyone or anything that came between himself and what he thought was his due. He'd spent the late evening in his quarters alone and that just wouldn't do for someone as important as the senior Enforcer.

So he walked casually along the corridor of the Sulu's personnel quarters deck playing idly with the black metal dagger that he had confiscated from Shirik Lektar, the dark skinned beauty that had caught his eye so boldly. He'd been denied her pleasure and he didn't see why he should be denied anything! His captain had specified that women were not to be taken against their will - but to Hadek, who enjoyed taking every woman against her will, that was a denial of his rights and privileges.

He stopped outside of Lektar's quarters, knowing that she would be alone. He tapped his commbadge and in his clipped harsh tones he said, "Computer, disable the communications devices of Ensign Lektar and open private quarters 035-C. Security clearance, Hadek, zero, zero, seven, one."

"Authority code recognized. Communications disabled. Access granted."

The door to Shirik Lektar's personal quarters hissed open and Hadek stepped cat-like inside. The room was semi-dark, but he could see the darkened form of Lektar on the sofa. As the door closed his hand held the small red remote concealed in his palm, the other held her kemla. "Good evening," he said silkily with a sly smile. "You missed our appointment."

As the door opened, Shirik looked up in surprise. No one should be able to open the door except.... Her eyes widened and she slapped her commbadge. "Lektar to security." Nothing happened, and she got a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. She set down her mug and blew out the meditation candle, her gaze locked on him. Her blood froze like ice inside her, but her expression remained carefully composed as her mind started turning over means of escape, anything in the room she might make a weapon of. "Indeed," she said. "I believe Captain Tebrianne gave specific orders regarding that." Her muscles were tensed, her night vision watching every twitch of his muscles that might indicate movement.

In the darkness she heard a soft chuckle. "Computer, lights," he said softly and the room's illumination sprang up to full intensity. He laughed softly at her desire to plunge the room into darkness to aid her vision. As the lights sprang up they caught her full on and Hadek added, "Computer lock the door. Authorization Hadek, zero, zero, seven, one." He twirled her blade between his fingers, his skill with the dagger unquestioned as he sauntered further into the room. He waited for her to lunge, or to try something...anything.

She blinked as the lights came up, getting to her feet to back away from his advancing form. "What do you want here?" she asked, although she already knew the answer. Her eyes were hard, and held no fear, but she could hear her heart pounding in her ears. Her only real chance was the weapons he carried, and she didn't think much of her chances of getting to one and using it before she was agonized by the collar around her neck or his painstick.

"Room inspection..." he drawled. He stared at her lithe form standing before him, his eyes traversing her beauty. He looked at her greedily, as if she were a morsel that he would take delight in tasting. He grinned cruelly and stopped before her low table upon which a padd sat, innocuous and alone beside the meditation candle. His eyes rested upon it momentarily and then flicked up to regard her violet eyes. "What have you been working on I wonder?"

Her expression was unchanged, her gaze steely hard. Luckily, she had finished her work some time ago, her files all locked with the new encryption algorithms she had devised, and Drokari access codes. But she knew if he confiscated the PADD it was just a matter of time before someone managed to unlock them. She had to distract him.

For the moment she didn't move, hoping his attention would stay on her rather than the PADD. She needed to keep him distracted long enough to figure out how to protect the information on the PADD, or even better, how to kill him. "Inspection, you say? Do you intend to inspect everything in the room?"

His smile was broad. "Oh yessss," he nodded, the dagger a twirling blur of black metal in his hand. "Disrobe..." he ordered. "Now." His black slanted eyes were glittering with a deep seated evil. They were suffused with lust as he looked upon her. He wasn't stupid. Her question had been to direct his attention away from the padd on the table, and he went along with it, to see where she would lead next.

She hesitated for a moment. She'd disrobed in front of countless people in her life, some who disliked her, a few even who hated her. But the thought of disrobing for this one made her feel dirty. She told herself it was no different than what she'd done for years back home, that the mission was all that mattered, not her. She moved slowly towards her bed and slowly sat, reaching to unzip the front of her uniform, slowly revealing inky black skin.

Her eyes moved over him, for the first time actually looking at him. She had to admit he wasn't bad on the eyes. For a moment she thought about that, about seducing him. It didn't look like it would be all that difficult judging by how he was looking at her, but would it gain her anything? She knew that no one was likely to come to her aid. The only one who might, maybe, if she were lucky, was Saavar. Just thinking of him made her stomach flip over. Would he feel what was happening?

Hadek's grin was appreciative as she started to disrobe without a single argument. She was looking at him and appraising him too, and her eyes tracked over his muscular form. His eyes were drawn to the black skin as it was uncovered, her every move graceful and erotic. It struck him that she wasn't putting on the same show of defiance as she had in the Cargo bay. Maybe she liked it this way. From what he'd heard of the Drokari, they were a dark passionate race that embraced slavery in all its glorious forms.

He couldn't help but lick his fleshy lips when her uniform slid over her shoulders to expose her feminine assets. His breath caught in his throat then...she was stunning. He stopped playing with the knife, he couldn't concentrate. He just stood there watching her, and sweat began to bead his brow.

She let her uniform pool around her hips, and kicked off her boots. Her expression changed subtly, the hardness of her eyes melting into a sultry gaze as her eyes moved over his form. She stood from the bed to push the uniform from her hips, and stepped out of it as it dropped to the floor around her ankles. Her black skin was smooth, flawless but for the single scar just below her ribcage on the left side. Her new muscles of the past two months' exercise regime rippled under her skin as she moved.

Hadek let the breath he was holding out slowly as he feasted upon her nakedness. The violet eyes weren't so hard now. She'd gone from frightened to sultry in the space of a heartbeat and that above all else told him that she was trying to distract him. He didn't let it show at all. He just smiled. The silvery slave collar around her neck shone in the light. He was growing aroused and her supple, hairless skin was simply superb. "Untie your hair," he ordered, though it came out a lot quieter than he'd meant. It wasn't so much an order as a plea. Her eyes were captivating, but he couldn't help glancing at her breasts or the swell of her belly and her exposed sex. He swallowed hard as he watched her from across the room, his hand still clutching the hidden remote against any possibility that she might lunge for him or the knife he carried.

She reached up behind her, her breasts lifting with the movement, and released the tie at the end of her braid. She ran her fingers through her hair to unravel it, letting it drape like a cloak around her shoulders. It was so long it hung down to her hips, cascading down her body. Her every movement was designed to be erotic and arousing, with a smooth grace born of long hours of practice. She settled herself once more on the edge of the bed, her gaze caressing him from across the room.

Her mind was racing, running through and discarding ideas, tracking where every weapon in sight currently was and thinking how she might reach them.

Hadek's sense of danger was heightened at her almost wanton display. She wanted him, that was what every movement of her body told him. She was unarmed, and totally at his mercy. He felt the urge to trigger the collar just to give her a taste of pain, but her eyes stopped him. He liked to play with his slaves, but he wondered what a Princess would be like...a willing Princess. It was tempting. He'd come expecting a fight...certainly an argument...never total capitulation and the look that she was displaying in her eyes. He was a good judge of women, and this one looked like she actually wanted to play. At least it wouldn't cause trouble with Tebrianne. She was willing.

He threw the long bladed dagger into the table. It was so sharp that its blade went right through, quivering with the power of the flick from his wrist.

Shirik took note of where the blade went without moving her gaze to it. She knew her chances of successfully killing him or even incapacitating him were slim to none, and getting smaller all the time. She studied Hadek, calculating her chances and tossing ideas over in her mind.

Hadek was a powerful man. He'd risen to lead the Enforcers aboard T'Briane's ship through cunning, viciousness and his abilities as a soldier of the Empire. The position and rank he held was done so at the point of a knife, barrel of a weapon and savagery with his underlings. Not one of the Enforcers would dare go up against him. Tebrianne only controlled him because she was T'Briane's twin and going up against her was the same as sticking the Captain - and even Hadek wouldn't try that.

The woman on the bed held no pause for his prowess as a killer. She was well toned, but she wasn't graced with the strength of a Vulcan as Tebrianne was. She was dangerous but not in any way Hadek feared. Not now. He looked into her violet eyes and his expression showed just how much he appreciated the naked beauty of Shirik Lektar. "Lay on the bed," he said softly, "and show me how much you want me." His hand unclasped the shoulder pin on his black uniform. His eyes held hers in a dark gaze.

She watched him, and realized she couldn't do it. The thought of his hands on her, of him touching her the way Saavar had...it made her feel sick. She was not going to let him touch her. The information on the PADD was safe for now, it would take time for even a computer systems expert to get into the files. And once he was gone, she could gain remote access to the PADD and erase its contents.

Steeling herself for what she knew his reaction would be, she crossed one leg over the other with a sly smile. "I never said I wanted you, did I?" she purred.

The cruel smile finally came back to his face.

She knew the game she'd been playing was a dangerous one. She expected punishment, and tried to prepare herself for what was coming.

His right hand squeezed slightly, enough to trigger the remote. The circlet around Shirik Lektar's neck suddenly ignited her nervous system with a massive and intense agony that thrummed through her. Her back arched and every muscle spasmed and clenched as she jerked onto the bed, her legs shot out and hands clawed as she silently reacted to the nerve impulses. Her throat had locked up and she couldn't even scream. It was indescribable. It was agony. Raw and fiery, as if she'd been dipped in molten slag. It went on for an eternity that was only five seconds. Enough time to feel it. Enough time that she didn't stop breathing after it was over.

The universe around her was gone in an instant as the pain lanced through her body, every nerve screaming at her brain. She didn't even feel her body's spasmodic reactions, was unaware of whether she was even breathing, all she felt was indescribable pain.

When her body finally went limp and her awareness slowly returned, she could already feel her internal defenses cranking up. Her mind began to withdraw to shield her from what she knew was coming.

When she regained her vision it was to see Hadek unbuttoning his uniform, the evil chuckle coming from his throat purely menacing. "Say you want me...beg me," he crooned.

She looked up at him, her gaze hard and cold as a glacier, and in their depths the fire of her Drokari will was ignited. He might torture her all night, but she would never give him the permission he sought to protect himself from Tebrianne's wrath. "Go to hell, ni'pavat drunik am vestol," she growled.

As she tried to rise from the bed the circlet ignited once more. It allowed her a single screaming exhale as she arched her back so much that there was a real danger of her back breaking from the strain. The pain was savage, but it wasn't as intense as the first jolt. He'd dialled it down a little, so that she could breathe, yet each searing agonizing breath was like liquid fire raging through her lungs. Her vision was tunnelled so that all she could see was Hadek reaching out to lovingly stroke her flanks, though that sensation was utterly lost in the world of pain she was thrust into.

"Ask for it," he said gently. "All you need to do to stop the pain is ask me...just one word.... Please."

She couldn't process any information but the pain. His face swam before her vision but she couldn't focus on it. All she knew was the searing pain racing through her body. Her brain was already releasing the Drokari equivalent of adrenaline and endorphins into her system, but if they had any effect she didn't notice. Her mouth moved, but she couldn't form words, only make growling groaning noises.

The pain eased to a barest sensation like pin pricks over every inch of her body, she shuddered with it but it enabled her to think and form words. Hadek had dropped his jacket and his muscular torso gleamed with sweat. Every inch of his torso was etched with a pattern of black lines, a tattoo of amazing intricacy that heightened his frightening aspect. He sat upon the bed, and she was struggling to breathe; the pain sensations were still rippling across her body. She was totally naked before him, and seemingly helpless as his hand cupped her breast. The sensation heightened by the continuing pain as his touch shot burning needles through her sensitive flesh. "Just a word...a please," he whispered soothingly.

The lines on his body brought the memory of Kaven Lucas' face into her head. Her mind was casting about, in pattern recognition mode. She took in ragged breaths, and focused on the black cube from her meditation lessons. Despite the renewed agony it brought as she moved, she reached for his wrist as he touched her, digging her nails in as much as she was able. "Please go to hell, you piece of filth," she grated out. If anything, the fire in her eyes only intensified into open defiance.

Hadek laughed softly. Her grip produced a spot of blood around each of her nails and he relished the pain; it sent a thrill through him as he hit the agonizer once more and she spasmed. Her hand locked around his wrist, but he didn't mind. The biometric circlet was delivering pain sensations through her body's bioelectric aura and she locked up again completely as he dialled it up to maximum. She was quivering and jerking and unable to breathe and he left it on for ten full seconds this time. He stopped it completely, giving her body a complete rest from pain, knowing that it was necessary to avoid her building a resistance to it. She released his wrist automatically as she drew a shuddering breath and while she was still struggling to control her jerking limbs he ran his hand across her flat belly and up to her breasts before standing away from her.

The wild look in her eyes was defiant. He liked that and so his game changed. He was no longer interested in sex to demean her. That wouldn't work anyway and the night was going to be a long one. By morning she would be broken and begging for it.

Just as she seemed to be able to respond he triggered the device again. Maximum. He casually walked over to the table to retrieve the padd and tried to access it. It was encrypted. He grinned as Shirik Lektar writhed and jerked in total agony on her bed. She was beginning to drool and bright blue blood flecked her spittle as she convulsed. He wandered back to the bed and sat beside her as he switched the agonizer off. "So Princess...tell me all about your little resistance movement. Do you think I'm stupid?"

Shirik couldn't answer for a time, jerking and twitching in aftershock And breathing in ragged gasps. Her hair was starting to stick to her in places as her body broke out into a sweat. "She..." she panted in Drokari. Yes.

He smiled, waiting. "What is being planned?" he asked softly.

"Other than your dismemberment?" She smirked darkly, tensing at the anticipated zapping to follow.

It didn't come when she expected it. Instead he walked over to the table and jerked her kemla free. He looked at the blade as he asked, "I want to know what is being planned...and who is planning it. I see you walking on and off the Bridge. Talking to Lyrr, to T'Kal going to the Operations Office and speaking to Ensign Farrell. Working on a padd that is encrypted...." He walked over to the bed upon which she lay. "You'll tell me what I want to know, Princess." He showed her the keen edge of the blade. "This crew is just too well behaved. There should have been a reaction to Lieutenant Crix's little game, but there wasn't. My men haven't had to smash any heads.... There's just too much discipline for my liking. It tastes of organised revolt. Waiting...." He stood over her. "Well?"

She didn't seem any more concerned about the kemla's blade than she did What he'd done already. Next to the agony the collar could dispense, her own blade seemed laughable by comparison. "Obviously you're not used to discipline. It shows." She frowned slightly. "Who the hell is Crix and what are you talking about?"

"You didn't hear?" he asked with a sly grin. "Lieutenant Crix smashed in the skull of some pretty little crewman in Astrometrics...she died. I believe she was also pregnant." He laughed, "Killed two birds with one club."

Astrometrics... she wasn't sure who that was. Why would they kill her? Perhaps for amusement. "I trust he was suitably punished...as you will be."

Hadek smiled. Crix was dead but that would be counterproductive. "Why would he be punished? The girl was involved in a plot. Now she's dead. Tell me what I want to know, Princess...or you may well suffer the same fate. What's on this padd will doubtless prove to be your undoing. Just on the suspicion of treason I can put you to death and there's nothing Tebrianne can do about that." He grinned wolfishly. Then he triggered the collar. "Don't be insolent with me." He grabbed her hair while she shuddered and jolted, wrapped it in a fist and used the kemla in a backhanded cutting action and sawed roughly through her white silken tresses. Her long hair fell in sheets around her as he sawed it from her head, laughing the whole time.

She had just opened her mouth to spit out her reply when the pain hit again. She groaned through it as it forced involuntary tears into her eyes. She didn't even notice what he was doing as it was happening.

When he'd finished he cut off the agonizer and waited until she knew what was happening, then he let the strands fall across her body as he laughed, one hand held above her letting the hair rain down over her.

She lay there panting for breath, and jumped slightly when she felt the touch of something. It took a moment for her eyes and brain to register what it was. Hair. Her hair. She just watched it rain down over her, thinking dully that she should be upset about it. But somehow the loss of some hair didn't seem all that important at the moment. She closed her eyes and wondered how long it would be before he killed her. She said nothing, just taking in air and waiting for her limbs to stop twitching again.

It was the commbadge that Hadek wore that chirped. He idly slapped it. "Hadek," he spat, eyes still playing over Shirik's nakedness.

"Sir, I have Captain T'Briane on the comm.. She wants to speak to you privately."

The senior Enforcer growled in dismay. "Tell her I will be in the Conference Room momentarily." Hadek snarled at Shirik, "I'll be back." He triggered Shirik's collar out of spite and frustration and she arched in agony again as he walked out the door.

The pain lasted for a long thirty seconds, by which time the remote was out of range and the collar automatically switched to passive mode.

As soon as the pain began to fade she struggled to move. If he was coming back she sure as hell wasn't going to be there when he arrived. Ignoring the involuntary twitches and spasms as best she could, she snatched her robe and struggled into it as she headed for the door.

To her relief, it opened. She peeked out into the hallway then dashed down it on bare feet, heading for the nearest person she knew of.

Hadek was not stupid. She could only assume he left her door unlocked purposely, to find out where she would go for help. That meant whoever she went to see was the next one in danger. It made her steps hesitate for a moment, but she knew she needed to find help somewhere, fast, and couldn't risk a turbolift ride.

She arrived at the door she sought and rang the chime over and over in her agitated state as her mind raced.

---

"Hedek's Trap"

Ensign Shirik Lektar
Lieutenant Saavar
Acting Captain Tebrianne Bancroft
Ensign Emma Summers

Location: Saavar's quarters, USS Sulu
Stardate: 57910.20, 02h35

***

As soon as the pain began to fade she struggled to move. If he was coming back she sure as hell wasn't going to be there when he arrived. Ignoring the involuntary twitches and spasms as best she could, she snatched her robe and struggled into it as she headed for the door.

To her relief, it opened. She peeked out into the hallway then dashed down it on bare feet, heading for the nearest person she knew of.

Hadek was not stupid. She could only assume he left her door unlocked purposely, to find out where she would go for help. That meant whoever she went to see was the next one in danger. It made her steps hesitate for a moment, but she knew she needed to find help somewhere, fast, and couldn't risk a turbolift ride.

She arrived at the door she sought and rang the chime over and over in her agitated state as her mind raced.

Saavar awoke to the chime being repeatedly pressed and he was out of bed almost immediately. In his darkened quarters he asked the computer who was seeking entry and was told that it was unknown. That woke him further.

He donned a short robe and tied it at the waist before padding through his quarters and ordering the lights up to full intensity. Logically it was not an Enforcer. If that was the case, they would already be inside, and so Saavar composed himself before saying, "Enter."

He stood a few paces from the door as it opened.

Shirik Lektar must have looked a fright as she rushed inside to get out of the hallway before she might be seen by an Enforcer. She wore nothing but a hastily tied robe, her hair was unevenly chopped off at neck-level, and the expression on her face was one of urgency and fear. There was still a bit of dried blue blood caked at the corner of her mouth, and there were hacked-off strands of hair stuck to her face and neck from the sweat there.

"Quick," she gasped out, as her face twitched involuntarily from the aftermath of the collar. "Call security, call Tebrianne...before he comes back!" She was already moving across the room towards his computer terminal.

Saavar was taken by surprise by her appearance, and by the fear that emanated from her. As she flew past him, he saw the missing hair, and his expression hardened. "What has happened?" he asked her back as she bent over his desk terminal.

"Call them now," she said, not offering any explanations yet. Her fingers flew over the terminal keys as she sought remote access to her encrypted PADD. "Hurry." The computer denied her access to the remote communications channels. The stark letters blinked on the screen: [ACCESS DENIED].

Saavar walked to his bedside and picked up his comm.-badge. "I need to know why you require me to call an Enforcer. The Sulu's security officers are not assigned their proper duties. I do not wish to contact their leader without knowledge of the reason, especially at this hour. I have no intention of embarking on a rash course of action. Explain your situation. Now." It was clearly an order. He saw the blinking access denial and looked at her.

"No...not their security," she said, scowling at her screen. "Call T'Kal and Tebrianne...before it's too late." She looked up at him, her eyes pleading. "Please, Saavar. I'll tell you everything, but get them here." She sank shakily into the chair at the terminal as adrenaline wore off and exhaustion started taking hold of her. She hadn't slept since the previous night, and even then only for a few hours.

He tapped the commbadge. "Saavar to Commander T'Kal," he said evenly.

The computer responded immediately. "Commander T'Kal is unavailable."

The Vulcan tapped once more, "Saavar to Captain Bancroft."

"This is Tebrianne," came the reply. A lingering chord hung in the air after her response, a song not yet finished. "How may I assist you, Lieutenant Saavar?"

"I am sorry to disturb you so late in the day, Captain, but a situation has arisen that demands your attention. Could you attend my personal quarters immediately? A female member of the crew has been attacked and has sought my assistance."

"I'm on my way," Tebrianne answered. "Bancroft out."

As soon as the commlink was closed Shirik waved him over. "I need your help, I've been locked out of all comm systems. We need to get remote access to my PADD quickly."

Saavar sat and typed in his access code. The screen cleared. "What do I need to do?" he asked succinctly.

Shirik gave him the necessary instructions to link to her PADD, and the access codes he'd need. "Delete these files." She indicated which ones on the screen. She folded her hands in her lap to still their involuntary tremors.

He did as she instructed and the files were deleted one by one. He sat back after he had finished. "I do not have authority to erase the fact that it was I who erased these files," he said calmly. "The computer record will show that clearly. Would you care to explain what it is I am about to face as a result of this?" His grey eyes held no accusation. He was simply stating fact.

She looked up at him, and tears formed in her violet eyes and slid down her cheeks at the thought of him having to endure what she just had. But she'd known when she came to his room that she would be making him their next target. "I'm sorry, Saavar," she said, her voice cracking. "But they can't see what was in those files..."

She took a steadying breath. "Hadek came to my room... and he saw the PADD lying on my table. I had to distract him, and so I... took my clothes off, made him think I was interested in him until I could think of how to protect the mission. But I wouldn't let him touch me, and so he used the collar... and then he tried to get me to give him permission, and then he tried to make me tell him if I knew about any rebellion on the ship..." It all came out in a rush and when she finished the tears were rolling down her face. She was afraid of what they would do to Saavar, and didn't want to tell him any details about the mission. The less he actually knew the better.

He accepted her explanation with a simple nod, standing up to put his arms around her. She needed comfort and he responded to what she needed. "Then you acted wisely," he said softly. Drawing away from her slightly he looked down into her violet eyes. "Do not fear for me," he said kindly. "It is a risk I am prepared to take."

Shirik clung to him, burying her face against him as she tried to calm herself. The mission was safe, but what would be the cost? She knew they'd already killed one person for suspecting a plot, what if they killed Saavar? She only clung to him tighter. "I do fear..." she whispered.

He smiled. "I do not," he replied. He lifted her chin and kissed her. If she could draw strength from him, then he had strength to give. It was a very un-Vulcan reaction, but he knew that it was the correct reaction for her. She was his Bond Mate, and her influence upon him was still changing him subtly, yet his Romulan blood accepted the changes easily.

She accepted his kiss, and it did help to calm her a little. "Tebrianne will be here soon..." she said quietly, and hoped the woman could do something about the situation. She drew herself out of his arms and wiped her tears on the sleeve of her robe. She needed to be composed, she didn't know whether Tebrianne would arrive first, or Hadek.

The door opened with a hiss and four armoured forms stepped in. Blood red armour shone in the lights of Saavar's quarters. Hadek stepped in last of all, a grin upon his face as he held up Shirik's data padd. He chuckled evilly. With a flick of his finger, two of the Enforcers stepped forward and brandished pain sticks.

Saavar's instant reaction was to push Shirik behind him. He stood tall in front of her and faced the senior Enforcer. "Captain Bancroft will be here momentarily," he said calmly, no hint of threat in his manner. "Torturing a female crew member for sexual favours is prohibited, I understand."

Saavar didn't need to push hard, she had already backed away as the door opened to reveal Enforcers.

Hadek laughed at the Vulcan. It was a sign that his men understood. The two pain sticks whirled toward the Vulcan in hissing arcs. Saavar seemed to be carved from stone, staring straight at Hadek, with no fear at all.

The weapons were not armed. They smashed into his shoulder and left knee almost simultaneously. Saavar was braced for it, but still the impacts were solid from people who knew how to use them. He buckled as his knee gave out. Already the sticks were rising to fall once more as Hadek laughed.

Shirik stood there stiffly, her face betraying no emotion as she watched Saavar fall, her insides going cold. Part of her mind screamed at her to do something, to help him, but she knew she couldn't. There was nothing she could do to stop it, and betraying any concern for Saavar would only make things worse. She could only pray Tebrianne arrived soon to stop it.

The dull crack of a painstick ripped across the room. It caught Saavar's wrist as he lifted his arm to fend the blow from connecting against his head. The heavy metal rod splintered the bone and the Vulcan cried out in pain, as the other Enforcer stepped behind him and whipped his weapon against Saavar's shoulders.

Shirik couldn't help but flinch at Saavar's cry. It was only the barest twitch of the muscles of her jaw.

The Vulcan was driven to his knees, a booted foot slammed into his side and he did nothing but hold his wrist protectively.

Hadek lifted a finger and the two Enforcers backed off a step. The senior Enforcer seemed to be enjoying the show. The Vulcan raised his head to look up at him and showed a completely calm face, a slight smile curling his lips. Saavar sat back on his heels, his robe had fallen off one shoulder, but he ignored it as he composed himself in total silence.

Hadek looked across the short distance to Shirik, their eyes meeting; glittering black and misted violet. "You'll tell me what was on the padd and who else is involved," he smiled. "Or this Vulcan dies."

Shirik met his gaze, her eyes hard and cold as they had been all that night. "I don't know what you're referring to," she said stiffly.

Hadek triggered the agonizer collar around Shirik's throat. She dropped as if poleaxed, shrieking as the pain ripped through her, jerking madly as her hands clawed the carpet and her back arched spastically.

Saavar surged to his feet and stepped straight at Hadek. The senior Enforcer was waiting for it and so were the four others in red armour. Two painsticks rammed into the Vulcan's gut. This time they were live. He cried out through gritted teeth but still kept coming at Hadek and the two other Enforcers slammed their sticks against Saavar's legs, the overall effect dropping him before he could reach Hadek.

As Saavar contorted savagely, his throat locked up and eyes wide, Hadek placed his boot heel against Saavar's throat. He pressed down hard and looked at Shirik still writhing on the floor, her skimpy robe no longer hiding her nakedness.

Hadek's laughter filled the room. "She's yours," he snarled nodding to the four Enforcers. "Have fun with her...see that she doesn't survive it." He looked down at the Vulcan who was still pinned under his boot and he shifted his weight to bring it to bear against his neck. "We'll put this rebellion down before it starts."

Phaser fire lanced into the room. One guard dropped into a heap and then the other. Tebrianne Bancroft stood in the doorway, weapon armed and ready. She made a show of dialling the weapon's settings higher as she shifted it to point at Hadek's chest. "P'raps you didn't receive my orders, 'adek," she said. "Those are painsticks, not clubs. They should be used as they were intended. Now, bugger off before I discipline you like Crix; and I assure you they won't be dumping any part of you in a bucket of slime. We need the crew in one piece, and your running around beating them into submission isn't 'elping. I was asked to come 'ere because a member of the crew was assaulted. You wouldn't 'appen to know anything about that, would you, 'adek?"

Hadek froze. So did the remaining two enforcers. "I caught them in the act of treason, Captain," he snarled. "I have proof."

"Good work," Tebrianne said. She indicated Saavar. "Get your bloody foot off his neck. You can give me your proof in one hour. You and your men are dismissed. And, I'm taking these two to Sickbay if they can make it, then to the brig for a nice comfy cell. I'll interrogate them when they've recovered from your treatment. Now, go prepare your report." She glanced at the two standing Enforcers, and indicated the fallen two. "You two, get them out of here."

The Enforcers jumped at the command and complied with haste. Hadek ground his boot in hard before he relented and lifted it. Savaar was unconscious, livid greenish bruises were marking his flesh where the painsticks had impacted him. His neck was likewise bruised.

Hadek left ahead of his men, eyeing Tebrianne's weapon. He stopped before her. "Disloyalty is to be punished." He held up Shirik's padd. "They tried to erase the contents of this padd," he grinned savagely, "but we managed to copy it in time. It is heavily encrypted, but I have Ramik working in on it now. He promises results within the day." He looked back at Shirik who was struggling to her knees. "The bitch had it in her quarters and she came straight here to get the assistant chief of science to erase what was on it. I say this coupled with what Crix found the other science officers doing...there's a rebellion hatching on this ship. I mean to discover the ringleaders. I want your permission to interrogate the chief science officer."

Tebrianne looked down at Saavar then back to Hadek. "No," she said. "I'll interrogate 'er. You've done enough, 'adek. Disloyalty is to be punished." She gave a meaningful glance to Shirik and Saavar and then back to him. "So is disobeying orders. Painsticks used in the proper manner don't leave bruises. And, I don't recall where a person needs to be 'eld beneath a boot for a painstick to be applied properly. You weren't disobeying my orders, were you, 'adek? You weren't torturing these two, were you?" She took a step forward. "I need these people able to do their jobs when we get through that gate, you bloody arse. I find a bruise on any of them, I'm 'olding you responsible. Crix got off easy. Cross me, and I won't make the same mistake with you. Now, get out of 'ere before I lose my patience with your disloyalty."

"You'll find more that bruises on the Vulcan. He tried to attack me and my men feel harshly about that. It happens. I didn't think you were the type to worry about a pretty Vulcan and his bitch...but then...you're not Human are you?" He said the word as if it was a higher calling. "I'll leave these to you then, but I'll be informing T'Briane...count on it."

"Of course," Tebrianne said. "And, see to it that the captain receives a copy of that padd as well, once Ramik has decrypted it. If there is a rebellion, we'll stop it. But, we'll do so in a way that doesn't leave us without a crew when we launch our attack against the Dominion. If we didn't care about the crew doing their jobs, we would have spaced them, or loaded them up to sell as slaves. The ship isn't going to fight in these battles all by itself, you know. That's why we keep them. And, if you've bludgeoned them all into senselessness like the thug you are, then they can't bloody do that. Now, get out of my sight before I inform Captain T'Briane you've been damaging her crew and making it impossible for them to do their work for her. Where do you think I got my orders, 'adek?"

He glared at her and nodded, finally leaving.

Saavar was still unmoving, and green blood dripped from his lips.

Shirik was on hands and knees. She couldn't regain her feet, but no longer cared. She painfully crawled her way to Saavar, her vision blurred with tears, and tried to determine whether he was still alive, her fingers checking for a pulse as she listened for breathing.

He wasn't breathing...and there was no pulse. Just the drip of green copruglobin that slowly stopped, pooling on the floor beneath his head.

Shirik choked on a sob, and raised her eyes to Tebrianne as tears flowed down her face. "He's not breathing...we need to get him to sickbay NOW!" she screamed, but it came out sounding like a hoarse rasp.

Tebrianne, between swearing fluently in Romulan, Vulcan and Federation Standard, tapped her communicator. Her voice was cold, angry. "Tebrianne to Transporter Room 1. Emergency transport. Three to beam directly to sickbay. Sickbay, Lt. Saavar is not breathing and his heart is stopped. Security, take Senior Lieutenant 'adek into custody. If he resists...kill him."

The three disappeared in a blue wash. When the universe returned, they were in Sickbay. Nurses and doctors hurried to Saavar's side. Tebrianne spun away from the scene. Inside, anger and guilt raged. She'd sworn to Lyrr she'd keep the crew safe. She failed Shyla Moreau, and now it appeared that she'd failed Saavar as well. She could only hope his Vulcan physiology would allow him to pull through this.

It had been so long since Tebrianne had felt so helpless, so unable to maintain a situation. In her mind's eye, she saw Marco. His leering face as he abused her, raped her. She fought to maintain balance. She needed control. The world was spinning, spiralling out of control. She was falling. Somewhere far away, she heard a long scream. Somewhere in the middle, she realized it was her own voice.

She was shaking. Her body seemed too small to contain the rage she felt. As the scream finally ended, she punched outward in a cathartic release, and the duranium wall crumpled under the blow.

She blinked and turned to see most of sickbay watching her, all but the medical team focused on saving Saavar's life. She murmured apologies, and moved slowly toward where Shirik stood.

Shirik had materialized on her knees on the floor, but a nurse had helped her up and onto a biobed to be examined, pulling closed her robe. She sat there staring in Saavar's direction, tears still sliding down her face, her features and limbs twitching now and then from the effects of the collar. Her hands were shaking even when she wasn't twitching, and she scarcely noticed Tebrianne's approach.

"If there's a way," Tebrianne said softly, "they'll find it. Vulcan physiology has remarkable ways of overcoming trauma."

Shirik's gaze was dull, the fire gone from her eyes. Tebrianne's words only made more tears escape them. "This is my fault..." she whispered brokenly. "This is all my fault...." She closed her eyes and buried her face in her hands, her shoulders shaking as she sobbed.

"It's not your fault," Teb said. "It's theirs. They did this. Don't blame yourself, Shirik. Don't get mad at yourself. They deserve to suffer for this, not you. I could take the blame for it too. I didn't get to 'is quarters fast enough. I didn't keep close control over the Enforcers. It's 'adek's fault, Shirik. He's the one that did all of this, not you. Blame 'im."

Shirik couldn't answer. She rubbed at her eyes and dropped her hands, turning her gaze once more to where the doctors worked on Saavar. They did this to Saavar, that much was true. But they did it because she had gone to him for help. She had chosen to go to him, and if he died, she'd never let herself forget that.

The medics soon catalogued the injuries to the Vulcan. He was alive, but he wasn't breathing. His heart was beating, but so slowly that it beat only once every minute. He was in a state of trance - a Vulcan meditational exercise that for now had saved his life. His trachea was broken, the swelling obstruction blocking his ability to breathe. His left wrist was compound fractured and he had multiple bruises that even now were livid greenish welts that conformed to the shape of the weapons that had inflicted them.

It was a simple matter to infuse his blood with fresh oxygen. A surgical procedure was needed to fix the cartilage and the bruises would heal with a dermal regenerator and time.

Tebrianne noticed one of the doctors look up and she approached. "Doctor," she said, her tone flat, almost Vulcan-like, "how is he?" The words were carefully enunciated, though her dialect still bled through. "And, is there any way I can 'elp? He and I, we share the same 'eritage."

Shirik was silent, just watching. The nurse who examined her brought her a tissue which she took wordlessly and wiped her eyes with while she waited to hear the doctor's verdict.

"He'll be fine," Emma Summers said to Shirik, giving her a smile. It froze on her face as the accent ripped across her consciousness. The voice was unmistakable. The tone was clear. A bolt of jagged fear tore through her and she almost staggered. All the colour drained from her face and she turned her head slowly to the source of that dreadful nightmarish accent. The sight of the woman standing next to doctor M'lira brought a sharp in-drawn breath and her hand went to her mouth as she turned away. The world spun. The universe shifted. Tebrianne Bancroft was standing in the middle of sickbay - alive. Back from the dead. Emma bit down on her urge to scream. The vile taste of vomit surged into her throat and she ran. She ran away from that apparition as tears came to her eyes at the shock. She left half the medical staff staring in her wake, but she fled and only just managed to reach the fresher before being violently sick.

Shirik raised her eyes to the nurse and nodded dully. Then she saw the nurse look over in the direction of Saavar and all color drain from her face. Her own gaze went to Saavar and she froze. Were Saavar's injuries worse than the nurse had let on? Was he dead? She looked after the fleeing nurse in startlement and got to her feet unsteadily to move up behind Tebrianne and peer around her at Saavar and the doctor.

Tebrianne glanced after the fleeing nurse, but the Caitian doctor had stepped up and she had no time to bother with the woman's flight.

"As Nurse Summers indicated, he'll be fine," Dr. M'lira said. "He's lost some blood, and his wrist was broken, a compound break. Repairing it will be a fairly simple matter. We don't see them every day, but they're not a serious concern, especially in his case. The trickier part is that his trachea was crushed. We'll need to repair the cartilage, but it will take some time. We have him breathing artificially for now, but he'll make a full recovery. When his body was injured, he entered a trance state." She glanced to Shirik. "It's a Vulcan physiological reaction to traumas such as this. His metabolism slowed to a near stop, which was why you found no pulse. It's actually there, but very weak." She gave a relieved smile. "So, I am happy to say, Lieutenant Saavar will be fine in just a couple hours."

Shirik let out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding, and blinked in surprise. Hours? She thought he might have to stay for days like she had. "When will he be awake?" she asked. "Will he be able to speak?"

"He'll have difficulty speaking for a time," M'lira said. "I don't think we should wake him before we've had a chance to perform the operation. We'll make sure you're the first to see him when he wakes, Shirik."

Shirik nodded. "I'd like to stay... and wait," she said quietly.

"Of course," M'lira said with a feline smile. "You may observe the procedure if you'd like. We'll be starting just as soon as the biobed is ready for him."

Shirik blanched at the thought of watching them operate on him. "No... that's ok... thanks. I'll just wait over here..."

As M'lira moved away to begin the procedure, Tebrianne followed Shirik. "Under normal circumstances, you would be placed in the brig," she said in a voice only Shirik could hear. "Instead, I'm to...take a different route. You'll become my bed slave. Given the way this universe works, it wouldn't be unheard of. And, it's known that I really don't have much of a gender preference. Behind closed doors, we'll have to figure out an amicable sleeping arrangement, but it'll give you a modicum of protection, access to my replicator and other resources. And, you'll be able to work in peace. Or, if you'd prefer, we can put you in a brig cell."

Shirik blinked and her shoulders sagged. Things just kept on getting worse. She certainly couldn't plan a mission from a cell in the brig, but at the moment she wasn't up to planning anything. She looked over at where the doctors were preparing to operate on Saavar with a pained expression. "What about Saavar...?" she whispered, clearly not wanting to leave him.

Tebrianne ran appraising eye over Shirik's injuries. "Well, it appears you've had a rather difficult ordeal tonight," she said. "I think it may be best that you stay here in sickbay, for observation. We can figure out the rest once Sickbay has assured me of your health." She gave Shirik a mischievous smile that disappeared as quickly as it'd appeared.

"Thank you," she whispered, managing a faint smile of gratitude. Then a thought occurred to her and the smile was gone. "Wait a minute... I thought Ben was supposed to be your... toy?"

"That's the plan," she said. "Though, not so much a toy. T'Briane is interested in him, and would have him brought over. I claimed him first, or so goes the story. I can get away with more because I'm her mirrored twin. She gives me allowances others don't receive. So, she won't challenge me on this, and it keeps Ben out of her bed. He's still Commander Lyrr's though."

"So...you would have...what? Two?" She frowned. This was too much to absorb and comprehend at the moment. Right now she only wanted to think about Saavar and his getting well again.

"In appearance, yes," Tebrianne answered. "In reality, I would have nothing."

Shirik sighed. She couldn't wait until this was all over. "Well, I'm going to be here for Saavar when he wakes up... Let me know when I have to go..."

"When Sickbay says you're okay to go," Tebrianne said. "We can find some arrangement that we can both deal with, and it should only be for a short time. For now, make sure you're there for him when he wakes up. If you need anything, contact me."

She nodded. "I will."

"Get some rest if you can," Teb said, then she was off toward the door.

---

"Comforting Moments"
By: Crewman Sorg Jurell
CPO Calyca Boothroyd

Location: USS Sulu, Boothroyd's Quarters
Stardate: 57910.20, 04h30

***

Caly had spent a fitful night of sleeping and waking, sleeping and waking, her thoughts and dreams keeping her in a state of flux. Despite the quality, it was one of the only nights she'd spent sleeping straight through. That was thanks to Jurell's presence and his continual soothing when she'd begin to wake. That and he kept her from falling out of bed several times. The last couple hours she'd spent in a sort of exhausted state of sleep that was so quiet it allowed Jurell to doze off.

When she awoke it was with a startled gasp. Her eyes snapped open and looked around wildly as she sat straight up in bed. She spotted the man next to her and the unfamiliarity of having someone in bed had her on the verge of scrambling away and a scream rising to her throat. Neither were executed as her brain recognized that it was Jurell.

He sat up as if he'd been struck, eyes flashing open and flicking across the room for threats before relaxing visibly and coming to rest on Caly. She looked surprised, and a little fazed. He smiled. "Hey...." He wiped sleep from an eye. "It's still really early." His body clock said it was before oh-five hundred. "And I'm usually not here, am I?"

Caly shook her head with an emphatic 'no'. "I'm usually alone..." she pointed out and then followed with a quiet accusation. "I slept all night..." Clearly indicating it was probably his fault she did. There were dark smudges under her eyes and they still had that haunted look about them. "You can go back to sleep if you want," she offered and now it was her turn to rub at her eyes and cover a small yawn. She looked a little rough around the edges.

"Yes...I was awake most of the night," he admitted. He smiled though. "You had dreams I think... so I stayed. I hope you didn't mind." He shrugged. "I wanted to stay with you. I didn't like the idea of leaving you alone...and...you were so upset."

She smiled a little wanly and shook her head again. "I don't mind. I... I'm glad you stayed," she admitted. "I wouldn't have stayed here alone, if you had left," she told him. "I'm sorry I kept you awake. Go back to sleep."

He flopped back down, and then yawned. "Come back here." He smiled and patted the bed beside him. He rolled so that he was on his side;, he was still in uniform and it was badly creased. He held out an arm.

After only a moment's hesitation she sighed softly and laid back down beside him. "I may need to get up and do...something," she warned and reached out to pluck at his uniform. "Are you even comfortable?"

He chuckled. "Not really." He plucked at her own uniform shirt, it was likewise creased. The jacket was gone - it had blood on it, and he'd tossed her boots in the corner. "You look great for first thing in the morning." He chuckled and pulled her closer. "You know, not having a replicator is going to make life difficult. We can't get new uniforms." His hand brushed a strand of curl away from her face. "How do you feel?" he asked softly, his voice showing concern.

"You're nuts," she eyed him, letting him pull her closer with a soft exhale. Look great indeed. She didn't answer his question for quite a few moments as she looked off over his shoulder at nothing. When she was ready to answer him she turned troubled green eyes to hone in and focus on his blue ones. "I'm not sure," she admitted. "Less...fragmented, I think," she smiled faintly. "I sort of have this...surreal feeling and I feel like I've been tackled by a dozen Kaven's..."

"That would hurt your day," he said softly. "It's all very surreal." He gave her a wan smile. "I'm glad you're feeling better. You scared me for a while. I want you to keep a very low profile today. I'm staying with you...in case...." His eyes looked troubled.

"Stay with me? You mean like a 'day in the life of Caly'?" She smiled faintly and turned a little to face him. "You don't have to work? You gonna follow me around if I do?" She reached out and rubbed her fingertips lightly over the stubble on his jaw.

The slight rasping sound her fingertips made reminded him that he needed to clean up. He moved his head slightly and his lips kissed her fingers. "I've been assigned to Engineering," he smiled. "I know a little...enough to help you at least. I know what tools are which...that's about it." He gazed into her wide green eyes and felt like he could stare into them all day.

Her fingers flexed slightly against his lips. "My tool caddy?" She couldn't help the small smile that curved the very corners of her mouth. "I... I'll see if Lt. Thaine needs me to do anything. But... But I'm not going to go there... Not where he is," she stated emphatically, her body trembling slightly at the thought of even catching sight of Crix. Her fingers went back to brushing lightly over his jaw.

"No," he said quietly, "you'll stay away from there." His hand brushed her cheek, and his eyes roamed her face; the perfect bow of her full lips, the tiny beauty spot near the corner of her mouth, the turned up nose and long-lashed eyes that were slightly puffy and dark shadowed this morning. He could tell that there was a lessening of the innocence in those emerald eyes, but a strength of will and a resilience that he knew would always be there was clearly evident. His lips curved in a smile as his fingers traced the line of her cheek and chin. He felt the familiar ache in his chest that staring at Calyca Boothroyd prompted in him. It was like he had to struggle for breath, yet felt elated and constricted at the same time. He was worried sick about her. Worried most of all that he wouldn't be there when she needed him. The moments lingered as he gazed at her, and he was conscious of the way she breathed, and the softness of her skin. He waited for that little huff of breath she always gave that never failed to still his own breath, and wasn't disappointed when the sound of it followed hotly on his thought.

"I'll stay away from there," she agreed and leaned very slightly into his touch. "I need to talk to Cristobel this morning though," she told him and then gazed into the intense scrutiny of his eyes. "You're studying me," she accused softly, her eyes doing her own studying of him, of his face, of that lock of hair that always seemed to fall over his brow and make him look rakish.

He nodded. "I am," he agreed in a whisper. "It's a new habit I'm trying to cultivate...if it makes you uncomfortable...I can stop." His smile was tender, and his hand caught hers as he kissed her palm, pressing his lips against the softness of her hand. Her hand seemed tiny in his, her fingers perfectly formed.

"I'm not uncomfortable yet," she assured him. She was centering all her focus on him at the moment and ignoring the plethora of jumbled thoughts milling around in her head. "That's a weird habit to cultivate though," she observed and blinked at the kiss to her palm, her breath escaping with a soft huff again. "I thought you were going back to sleep," she whispered. Her eyes never left his, despite being both haunted and troubled.

"How can I go back to sleep if you're awake?" he asked with a smile. That little exhale catching him again. "So...." He searched her eyes, his hand still holding hers, bringing it down to his chest and twining their fingers. "Would you like me to...get one of the counselors to come see you? Maybe you should talk to someone you know?"

His question brought sudden tears springing into her eyes with absolutely no warning. "I..." Her voice broke and she shook her head as she curled against him. Even the thought of recalling it had her crying against his chest again. "P-Potts..." she told him. "J-Just not now."

He instinctively wrapped his arms around her again and pulled her against him, cursing his own stupidity. "I'm sorry, baby," he whispered into her hair as she cried. He felt at a loss for a moment and he felt that tremor run through her that had plagued her during the night. "Okay...I'll get him later. Don't think about it now." He stroked her hair, pressing his cheek against hers, feeling guilty that he'd brought this on again, but also knowing anything at all might trigger a recurrence. She could just as easily have looked at something that reminded her of the girl, or the red armoured enforcers. It would keep happening for a while, maybe even weeks. Witnessing such brutality was shocking to the core, and on someone as carefree and innocent as Calyca, it would leave a lasting impression. He wished that she hadn't seen it, but that was a useless wish, and instead he prayed that she wouldn't be badly affected by it. He made soft crooning noises as he held her in his arms, waiting it out until she recovered her composure.

Her hands went back to clutching his shirt as she tried to block out that instant recall of sight and sound. She stayed pressed against him until her tears finally slowed to a stop. She hated this. Hated the way she was feeling. Hated that the least little thing seemed able to set her off. She felt raw... Vulnerable... Exposed.... Things she'd never felt before and she didn't know how to compensate for them, didn't know how to cope. But she knew she had to do something because she couldn't keep on like this. She rubbed her face against his shirt and nodded a bit. "D-Don't be sorry. It's n-not your fault."

"I know," he whispered, "it's going to get better. I promise you it will." He rubbed her back in a soothing motion. "We have to focus on something. Firstly you should get showered and changed. I'll get us some breakfast from the Mess Hall. We've got plenty of time. I'll make arrangements to be assigned with you today...don't worry. If you need anything at all, I'm here."

"Thanks," she sighed softly but didn't move and didn't release him. His words brought home the stark reality that she didn't want to be alone. Not now. "Not just yet, okay?" She relaxed against him, letting out a pent up breath. "It's early. You said so," she reminded him and rubbed her face. "I feel so tired..."

He smiled. "Okay, why don't you close your eyes for a while. You can sleep for a bit." He rubbed the back of her neck and felt her relax a little more.

"I will if you will," she murmured absently and shifted a bit, pressing closer and turning her head so that her ear rested over his heart. She let out another soft sigh and he felt the tension easing away from her body.

"That's it, baby," he whispered as he settled himself a little more comfortably. "Sleep...." He brushed his lips against her forehead. The minute vibration of the ship and the deeper and stronger heartbeat of the Bajoran soon soothed her into a light, restful sleep.

He was tired too and he drifted to sleep with a slight smile on his face. The warmth of her body and her steady breathing soothed him, and just before he faded out he wondered what it would be like to be this way every day. Little did he know that the recesses of Caly's subconscious were echoing the wonderings of his. Only hers were wondering what it would be like to not fall out of bed on a regular basis.

---

"Reacting"
By: Lt. Brennyn Scott, RN - Chief Counselor
Ensign Shirik Lektar - Operations Officer

Location: Sickbay, USS Sulu
Stardate: 57910.20, 06h00

***

Brennyn Scott weaved her way through sickbay briskly, fully alert and arms pumping from side to side. The details she'd received were sketchy at best, but this much was clear: Shirik had been attacked and Savaar had been beaten, presumably during the struggle to save Lektar.

Bree didn't know yet whether Savaar would pull through, but for now she was not here to see the Vulcan, but his would-be rescuee. She asked a nurse where she could find Shirik and headed in the right direction, bracing herself for what she might find.

Shirik was sitting by Saavar's bedside while he slept. Her hair was gone, roughly chopped off at the neck, she wore nothing but a white robe with green Vulcan blood splashed on the sleeve, and she looked exhausted and haunted. She didn't notice the approaching counselor.

"Shirik?" Bree whispered quietly, leaning against the biobed opposite Savaar. "Have you been examined?" Scott had no idea what had transpired, but the rumbling in her stomach told her it wasn't good.

Shirik jumped slightly and looked up. Her eyes were haunted and guilt-ridden. "Yeah." She nodded. "I'm fine."

Bree tilted her head toward an empty exam room. "Mind if we talk in private?"

Shirik glanced over at Saavar but there was no indication he'd wake any time soon, so she shrugged. "Ok." She got to her feet and followed Bree into the exam room.

When the doors swished closed behind Lektar, Bree sighed and regarded her semi-friend with some concern. "Are you sure you're ok?" She glanced at the stained sleeve. "If you need to be examined and would like to change, I assure you I can be discreet..." Even if her offer were refused, Scott wanted to make sure Shirik wasn't left in need.

"I've already been examined," she said tiredly. "I was zapped a few times, but I've been assured there are no permanent effects from it." She paused. "Saavar wasn't so lucky."

"That doesn't sound like such a lucky break," Scott remarked quietly, "but I'm sure the medical team is doing the best they can for Savaar. You were alone in your quarters when you were attacked?"

She nodded. "I was just about to try to get some sleep when Hadek showed up."

"And then what happened?" Bree asked gently.

Shirik sighed. She didn't want to relive it again, but she knew why Bree had to ask. "He saw my encrypted padd, and decided to torture me, first for my permission for him to have sex with me, then when that didn't work, he tried getting me to tell him the contents of the padd. Then he got called by T'Briane and had to leave. When he did, I left too, and sought help." She paused then, overwhelmed once more by the guilt of Saavar's beating.

"He tried to force himself on you and when that didn't work, he beat you with the painstick?" clarified Bree.

She shook her head. "No... he never touched me with the painstick. He used this." She indicated the collar around her neck. "He came in and said it was a room inspection. When he saw the padd, I panicked. I felt I had to distract him from it until I could think of what to do to keep its contents safe... so I distracted him with my body," she said quietly. "But I couldn't stomach the thought of letting him touch me. When I would only let him look but not touch, that's when he started using the collar. He tried to get me to say yes, to let him have sex with me, because he was under orders not to unless the woman was willing. But when I wouldn't submit to that, he turned his attention to the padd once more, and then tried using the collar to get me to talk about that, and about anyone else that might be involved in a rebellion on board."

Scott listened carefully, filing her last statements away for now. She had yet to speak to any senior staff about a possible large scale rebellion in motion and obviously wanted to know if such a plan were in the works, but her work took precedence. "I'm so sorry, Shirik. I can understand why you'd be frightened, but you mustn't blame yourself for Savaar's injuries or for what you endured. There was nothing you could have done to stop him."

"Tebrianne came and stopped it," she said. "We'd called her, but she arrived after they had beaten Saavar almost to death," she whispered. "He's only still alive because he's a Vulcan. But he was only beaten because of me."

"No, Shirik," Scott asserted, "Saavar was beaten because the Enforcers are bullies who wanted to assert their own perceived importance. He chose to confront them because he cares for you. It was a respectable decision, but clearly his choice. He is not to blame for wanting to do the right thing any more than you're to blame for asking for help."

"It was my choice to go to him for help. If I hadn't, he'd be fine right now. I only went to him for help to try to erase what was on the padd so it wouldn't fall into their hands, but they'd already copied the files... so he was beaten for nothing. Because of my choice."

"A choice that you made with the best and only information you had at the time," reminded Bree. "You needed help, you'd been attacked, Shirik. You had no way of knowing if Hadek would kill you or keep his word regarding sexual consent. But I'm not here to beat you up for your feelings right now, ok? Just know that no one here blames you for what happened and I'm here if you need me. You're going to need some time."

She nodded, folding her arms defensively and looking anywhere but at Bree. "Yeah," she muttered.

Bree placed a firm but gentle hand on the arm that was folded on top. "You don't have to handle this alone, you know. I do have some notion of what you're going through, and I can help. You're not alone, Shirik."

"You do?" She looked up then, skeptically.

Scott nodded. "I begged my parents to settle somewhere planetside. I was so tired of bouncing from starship to starship that when they announced they were seeking political office on Betazed, I was practically manic with joy. At the time, I think I knew my parents would hate it, but I felt entitled, so I ignored that little voice inside me. And when the media descended on my family like vultures, I convinced myself that it was the price they had to pay for their dream. I never thought they did it for me... I couldn't wait to leave for the Academy and get away from all that family pressure, and when I did, the Dominion decided to show up. By the time I returned home, they were dead. They were prime targets as political figures." She shrugged, her eyes misting slightly. "My parents died doing something that wasn't even their first choice all because I couldn't stand leaving another group of friends behind. The irony of all of this is I ended up in Starfleet after all."

"No offense, counselor, but that's not exactly what I've gone through," she said quietly. "But I appreciate the offer."

"Did I say it was a perfect example?" she asked with a smile. "I'm here for you, Shirik, if you want to talk about it. I'll always be here, and look, it doesn't have to be a complicated thing, just two women talking."

"I'll keep it in mind," she said, sounding tired. "Right now, I don't really feel like talking. I just want to make sure Saavar is all right, and get a shower, and get some sleep."

"I understand. If you need something to help you sleep, don't be afraid to ask. I'll authorize it for you just in case."

Shirik nodded. "Thank you," she said. She knew she'd probably need it, if not to today, then sometime soon.

"No problem." And with that, she left to give instructions to the duty physician.

---

"Blood Bond"
By: Ensign Shirik Lektar, Operations
Lieutenant Saavar, Science

Location: Saavar's quarters, USS Sulu
Stardate: 57910.20, 07h34

***

Shirik accompanied Saavar back to his room after he'd been released from sickbay, ready to offer any help if he needed it as they went. She was silent as they made their way there, not feeling much like talking in the corridors, and mindful of what the doctor had said about Saavar having some difficulty speaking for a while. She was still dressed only in the skimpy robe she'd hastily thrown on, spattered with drops of green blood on the sleeve. She looked like a mess, with her raggedly chopped hair and tear-streaked face, and still she twitched every now and then in aftermath from the jolts she'd received from the collar.

She was physically exhausted, mentally derailed, and emotionally a wreck. Her eyes were dull and haunted, and her fear and guilt were like a lump of lead in her stomach. She followed Saavar into the room and cringed as her eyes were drawn involuntarily to the stain of green blood on the carpet. Although she felt like she'd already cried gallons worth of tears, the sight of the stain caused fresh ones to well up in her eyes as the whole horrible scene replayed itself in her mind.

Savaar regarded her as the door to his quarters slid closed and felt the welling up of her sadness in their shared bond. He reached out and touched her, stepping up behind her and turning her away from the sight of his blood. His grey eyes held hers for a moment as his hand linked with hers. The telepathic bond was renewed and he focused on her mind.

Do not be sad, he thought as he gazed into her violet eyes. It is now in the past and is gone. Allow it to pass. I am unharmed and we are together. Do not fear. His lips smiled gently and one hand came up to cup her cheek, feeling the moisture of her tears. Do not cry.

Her hand clung to his like a lifeline. As he touched her cheek, she trembled violently as her emotions overwhelmed her, and she buried her face against him as she burst into soft sobs. Fear, sadness, and guilt crashed against him like a wave from her. "I'm sorry, Saavar.... I'm so sorry..." she sobbed against his chest. "Oh gods I'm sorry... I'm sorry...." It was like a mantra, it was all she could get out. He almost died, and it was because of her. She didn't feel she deserved his kindness and comfort, but she desperately needed it at the same time.

His arms went around her and he held her to him, her face buried in the crook of his neck. He closed his eyes and felt her strong emotions wash through him. I am glad that you came to me, he thought in a mental whisper. She could feel his warmth and comfort and the subtle shift in his own emotional state. He allowed the deeper feelings he held for her to surface as he stroked her back and calmed her trembling. It was correct to seek my assistance. He may have done irreparable harm to you if you had not. It was necessary. I am glad that I was able to deflect their intent from you. I would have it no other way. It was a comforting warmth that settled upon her. He had no regrets.

"I'm sorry..." her words faded in volume to a whisper. "I was so stupid...." She wished she had had more harm to her. Saavar had been savagely beaten, and would bear the physical reminders of it for a while yet, but she had not a single mark on her from the encounter, only the loss of her hair. She wished she hadn't come to him, had spared him what happened and taken it herself. Even the reason she had done it, the data on the padd, hadn't been saved. He had been almost killed for nothing. No, not for nothing... for her stupidity. Her mind chastised her ever since Hadek had come to her room, telling her she should have done this or that differently. If only she had hidden the padd before he arrived, if only she had erased the files sooner, if only... All this ate at her, and flowed through their bond.

He lifted her chin, and as she chastised herself he closed his fingers over the pulse points on her face. The meld came clear almost immediately. Their minds meshed into one as Saavar stared into her eyes. He fully opened his mind to her as hers was engulfed in a calming presence that was filled with concern for her. The fact that he had almost died did not even matter to him. He was only concerned for her. There was something else there too. Yet even Saavar did not understand the emotion.

For a moment she had the urge to protest, to draw away from the meld, but the urge faded away as his calming presence washed over her, taking with it much of her confusion and pain. Her breathing slowed, her body ceased its trembling, and she lifted her eyes slowly to his. It was so easy to lose herself in it, to just let go of everything but him in the meld. She held him tightly, not wanting to let go. He was something solid and real to cling to. Although no place felt safe to her any more, she felt safe for the moment, in his arms, in the meld.

Her scrambled thoughts finally able to find some measure of order, she was able to focus once more, and bury the sorrow and guilt. He was right, what had happened was behind them now, what mattered was what was ahead of them. They had to get home, that was what mattered. "Thank you," she whispered.

He pulled apart from her mind gently and withdrew his fingers from her cheek. They were still standing in the center of his quarters and he was very aware of her body pressed to his. He smiled and leaned down and kissed her. It was a short meeting of lips, but she received a flash of his mind at the renewed contact. He enjoyed the sensation.

Her mind now focused on him rather than herself, her eyes opened slightly at what she felt in him. The emotion slowly awakening in him, that he didn't understand... she understood. All too well, and it reawakened fear and dread in her for what was ahead of them. Again she had the urge to pull away from him, but she couldn't in the face of his gentle comfort.

He pulled away from her, his hand dropping from her cheek as he moved past her. He padded into the fresher, still wearing the robe that he had been transported away in. Discarding it he stepped into the sonic shower and set the cycle. The sonic waves rippled across his body as he turned slowly, allowing the pummeling sensations to clean his skin and soothe his tensed muscles. The bruises on his legs and abdomen were a slight discoloration now. Most of the damage removed by the dermal regenerators in sickbay. His wrist still ached, but it would be fine in a day or so. His throat was slightly tender, and he had been told not to talk for at least five hours. He closed his eyes and relaxed, leaning against the rail as the sonic cycle continued.

She moved to sit on the edge of the bed as he went into the fresher, and hugged her arms around herself as she waited, glancing nervously at the door every so often. She shivered, reaching up to finger the ragged ends of her hair. She felt naked without it, naked and violated. She turned her gaze to the bathroom door, listening to Saavar's movements in the fresher, thinking about him, about what she'd felt in the meld.

He took several minutes to cleanse his skin, the sonic massage doing wonders for the soreness, yet he was immensely tired. He knew it to be a reflex of his physiology that demanded rest to recuperate from the shock of the attack. When he emerged from the fresher he simply walked across the room and slid into his bed, ordering the lights off, knowing that Shirik would like the dark. She watched him from the foot of the bed until he pulled away the covers on the other side and gave her a smile in the darkness.

Shirik stood from the bed and moved to his side. She leaned down to kiss him gently. "Get some rest," she whispered. "I'm going to get cleaned up, and I'll join you." She offered him a small smile and momentarily rested her hand on his before going to disappear into the fresher herself.

She returned very quickly, having felt irrationally vulnerable and unsafe in the bathroom alone. Her reflection in the mirror had shocked her, she no longer recognized the person she saw there. But she was clean and felt marginally better, and slipped into the warm bed beside Saavar, snuggling close to him.

The Vulcan was already filled with a lassitude that drew him further toward sleep, and as she slipped into his embrace he conformed his body to fit hers and murmured softly against her neck, a soft kiss and a projection of warmth rippling through her bond. He felt comforted, and as he slipped nearer to the comforting warmth of sleep, his mind opened to her. He felt an illogical sadness at the loss of her hair.

Shirik held him protectively in her arms, burying the fingers of one hand in his hair. She kissed his forehead softly, and a small smile found her lips as the bond brought her his sadness about her hair. It wasn't so illogical to her, she felt the same way.

She lay there, warm and content, but she didn't feel safe, and despite her utter exhaustion sleep wouldn't come to her. She watched him in the darkness as he slept, guarding his sleep and thinking about what she'd felt in the bond. She'd thought about it while she was in the fresher and made her decision. They both needed time, time to heal, to recover, and to deal with the things that had happened. She wouldn't do anything about it, but give Saavar the time he would need to come to terms with what he was feeling, and to make his own decision as to what he would do about it. In the meantime, she would be there for him, as she had been since they met.

The bond was fully open to her as Saavar drifted in sleep. As a touch telepath, his body contact with her established the lesser mind meld, and she saw the images that played across his subconscious mind. He relived the moments of his beating, and he'd known full well that to have fought would have brought reprisals. It had been entirely logical for Saavar as an avowed pacifist to accept the punishment meted out to him in place of his woman. Only when Hadek had triggered Shirik's collar had he felt the burning agony tear across the bond. It had been a purely emotional response to Shirik's pain. He'd wanted to stop him. Shirik's pain had been unbearable for him.

She was saddened that he'd had to bear not only his own pain, but hers as well. His replay of the event triggered her own memories, and her eyes welled with tears once more. Her free hand stroked his back to comfort him, the touch comforting her as well.

Hers had been the first face that he had seen in sickbay after the minor surgical procedure. He'd felt the rush of emotion that he didn't understand at seeing her. Yet it wasn't an uncomfortable emotion. It had been accompanied by relief and happiness at seeing her unhurt as his last memory had been Hadek ordering her to be killed.

She closed her eyes, a faint smile coming to her as she lay quietly and let herself sink into the bond and absorb the images and emotions that came to her from him as he slept. It was oddly comforting, having someone who shared the horrible experience with her, who could understand what she was feeling and why. She hoped she could give him that same comfort.

It was four hours later that Saavar stirred from a deep sleep. His first awareness was the warm comfort of her body pressed to his and the slumbering mind drifting with his own. He opened his eyes in the darkness of his room and slid an arm around her back, feeling the luxurious softness of her silken skin. He missed her hair; the length of it and the feel of it brushing him. He knew that it was easily replaced, but that didn't seem to lessen the feeling. She murmured and snuggled closer, and he sighed as her lithe body moved against his. It was strangely erotic, and it caused him to examine the feelings that were evoked by her proximity. They were twined together, and his hand slid along her back and thigh, his mind feeling the response within her to his touch.

Somewhere along the way Shirik had succumbed to exhaustion and the pleasant comfort of the bond and drifted into sleep. It was deep and for a change, dreamless. The movement of his hand along her body caused her to press closer to him with a soft sigh, though she didn't wake. Her skin was soft and warm, and what was left of her hair still held the faint scent of the perfume she used.

The events of the night seemed to fade from Saavar as he held Shirik beneath the covers. The room was in darkness, even the stars were blacked out by the polarization on the view port. A snug and warm womb of comfort in which they both curled and the Vulcan experienced a swelling of emotion that bemused him and yet was heightened by the tiny whimper that escaped Shirik's lips as they pressed against his throat. He felt a growing awareness of her body and its rhythms; her breathing, the soft caress of her breath against his skin, and the twitch of her fingers against his chest. He could feel the exquisitely soft swell of her breasts and belly and the heaviness of her thigh laying across him. His hands stroked her, just to feel the sensation and to revel in it.

She nuzzled her face into the crook of his throat, her eyelashes brushing against his skin as her eyes flicked under their lids in sleep. Her breathing was slow and even, and her skin reacted to his touch with small shivers.

Saavar did not wish to wake her, but his thoughts were drawn to the physiological reactions that were spreading through his body with a slow inevitability. Instead of asserting his concentration to banishing them, a feat he was completely capable of, he instead catalogued the sensations and noted their progression from vague arousal to ardent desire. Her mental bond with him had changed him in many ways, and perhaps it had been the bond with Xayella Tagliesh that had unlocked the sensuality of desire in him, but Shirik personified it. He did desire her, both intellectually and physically. He desired her. It was a concept denied by most Vulcan-kind, yet embraced by their Romulan brothers. The Romulan Star Empire was far larger than the population of Vulcan, and it was so because they did not deny their passions. Romulan males mated out of desire, not the inevitable explosion of emotional chaos that was inflicted on the Vulcans.

Saavar was of Romulan blood and Shirik made his Romulan blood boil with desire. The currents of it stirred through their bond, and as they lay entwined, the strength of Saavar's feelings percolated into Shirik's sleep.

Shirik's mind was fuzzy and warm, but slowly moved closer to wakefulness as his feelings infiltrated her sleep. She murmured something unintelligible, her lips brushing his throat. Her eyes fluttered partially open, and she breathed in the scent of Saavar's skin and sighed softly. "Are you awake...?" she whispered.

The sound of her whisper in the darkness made him smile. More than awake, he thought at her. His hand brushed the exposed back of her neck as the other gently clenched her thigh that lay across him. The current state of his arousal made itself known as he turned slightly into her body.

The touch at the back of her neck sent a shiver down her spine and she chuckled softly. It seems you are feeling better, she observed. Did you have interesting dreams while you slept? She curled her arms around him and kissed his throat gently.

I was unaware of dreaming, he thought as she kissed him. He rolled to his back and held her to him so that she rolled above him, her softness pressed warmly against him. His lips found her throat and her shoulder as his hands moved down her spine to grasp her flanks.

Then what brought this on? she smiled slightly, giving a soft gasp as she shivered at his attentions. Be careful... you don't want to strain anything. I'm supposed to make sure you rest. Her lips found his chest, as her hand lightly caressed his cheek. Her desire was being kindled by him, but she was for the moment actively seeking to keep it from raging out of control.

I will be careful, he thought. I believe you did... at least the proximity of you. He shivered as her lips caressed him and for the first time he dropped all pretence at controlling his emotional responses. He allowed them free reign. He gripped her shoulders and pulled her gently upward until he could kiss her mouth, her full dark lips so soft and inviting. The swell of her breasts brushing his chest excited him. He wanted her; desired her. He needed to possess her, and that need and that desire was wide open in his mind as he lost himself in her kiss.

She gasped into his kiss in surprise, as she felt his raw emotions racing unchecked. Her control crumbled in the face of it, and she could do nothing but surrender to his desires as they ignited her own, and she returned his kiss deeply, her hands beginning to slowly roam his body. I've created a monster... she grinned.

No, he thought with a touch of ferocity as she responded to him, only freed one.

Saavar sank with her into the sensations of his desire and the sating of it. It was a primal thing that drove him and unlike Ponn Farr, he was conscious of all of it. This was what it was like to allow emotions freedom to rage and he swam in it. Her moaning sighs, her cries and the way she moved against him, drawing him into her, soaking up his caresses and surrendering to his lust allowed him to freely express his needs. He cried out her name, he sighed the syllables of it, he whispered it and he moaned it, and all the while he kissed her, caressed her and fulfilled her.

She reveled in the feel of his explorations in the bond, his emotions run free and uncontrolled. Her name from his lips, and the way it sounded, the way he sounded, all reached into her core and made her feel free and wild as well. For a time she was able to forget the fear and pain of what had happened, and lose herself in pleasure and desire.

It was an aching, passion-filled, sensual exploration of each other in a way that hadn't been touched before. It went on, and on, as they touched minds and souls, delving deeply into each other's minds, emotions and bodies as a singular reach for nirvana; one mind and one body climbing the steps to heaven as they held each other tightly against the universe. The release when it came was a roaring climax of such intensity that it left them both bereft of speech, and so exhausted that all they could do was hold each other and struggle for breath.

Shirik was exhausted once more. The sleep she'd had was only a few hours, and had next to none in the day or two previous, so what reserves of energy she'd had were completely drained by the time they were done. She lay panting for breath, coated in sweat, tired but utterly satisfied and content. A small weary smile graced her lips as her half-closed violet eyes studied his face. I never knew such a monster was within you, she said teasingly.

Neither did I, he thought with no small surprise tingeing his mind. Saavar was astounded, taken unaware at just how powerful it had been. Ponn Farr was a raging tormented release of such intensity that it burned...this was not as intense physically, but emotionally it had been. He breathed raggedly and did not care to exert his mind to controlled breathing. He didn't want to lose the contact he had with the woman laying in his arms. His own emotions were in turmoil, yet it was not unpleasant turmoil. He could sense her satisfaction and tiredness, and he too felt the same. He was sated. Truly sated. Was this what it meant to embrace his Romulan blood?

He drew her against him, wrapping his arms securely around her possessively and his thoughts were tinged with that same urge, a protective, possessive attachment to Shirik Lektar that defied his ability to classify the emotion. All he knew was that he didn't want to give it up. He didn't want to give her up.

She snuggled against him in his embrace, her cheek against his chest. Her arms were around him, and one hand lazily traced the muscles of his back as she relaxed. I feel like I could sleep for a week, she murmured. But there will be much to do tomorrow....

Yes, he thought. Sleep. I also will sleep. He smiled and kissed her brow, and she felt the touch of tenderness that rippled through the bond as he did it. There will be many tomorrows, he promised.

---

"Don't Sleep"
By: Ensign Raina Derrell - Emergency Medical Officer
Ensign Cristobel Sefton - Nurse
and Lt. Cmdr. Damhnait Sefton - Chief Medical Officer

Location: USS Sulu, Sickbay
Stardate: 57910.20, 07h58

***

When Cristobel Sefton stepped into the main ward, he didn't even see the Enforcers flanking the door. It was the small handful of patients and the overly-sympathetic medical officers whom he feared; he squeezed his telepathy shut tighter. The slave collar that the Enforcers had given him bulged under the collar of his uniform -- he had chosen to dress himself in the one that was still stained in Shyla's blood. Cris took a few more tentative steps into main Sickbay, but then stopped. He just watched the movement around him.

Raina hated the Enforcers for several reasons. But her attention immediately shifted to Cris, even as she tried to shake of very bad dreams that weren't just dreams. Though the emergency medical officer would be happier if they were only that. Doing her best to calmly approach her friend: "Morning..."

"Morning," Cris echoed, his voice thick. "Is there...uh..." he trailed off blankly and shrugged, shaking his head.

"Is there uh...what?" Raina asked a bit tentatively, still feeling the chill of her unsettling encounters with their overseers.

Cristobel bit his lower lip, as his facial expression contorted with concentration. Finally, he shook his head again, and sighed, "I lost it. I don't remember."

Raina nodded. "I know that feeling all too well. Are you ok?" Her comment was entirely serious.

"No," Cristobel shook his head much more pronouncedly. He clenched his jaw quite visibly and blinked furiously to hold back tears and sobbing; there had been so many already, and there was plenty of time for more later. He started to walk alongside her towards the equipment cabinet at the back of the 'bay, for no reason other than to avoid standing aimlessly in the middle of the room.

"How are you?" Cris asked, his voice cracking in the process.

Raina looked at him. "If you feel like talking about it I'm here but only when you're ready." Deeply pondering her friend's question before answering: "Tired."

Cristobel nodded at her offer, but explained, "I've only just remembered what it's like to properly feel again. It's gonna take me some time longer to understand it enough to form it into words." He suspected she'd understand. "We'll talk about it. When we're both less tired."

She nodded. "I'm going to hold you to that one." Raina paused as she looked at her friend. "When this is over we're both going to need a long break."

Cris emphatically nodded his agreement, or at least it was as emphatic as he could get this day.

"Cristobel," Doctor Sefton professionally called out from her office. Once she had Cris' attention, she led the way into the life sciences laboratory, knowing that Cristobel would follow. He caught up to her just as they were passing by the Enforcers, and Damhnait began to explain, "There are some very early warning signs of an outbreak of Tarkalean Flu. Since the replicators are offline, we will need to prepare medications through ancient..."

Once the sliding shut doors allowed them privacy in the lab, Damhnait faced her son and deeply frowned once she saw the uniform he was wearing. "Oh, Cristobel..."

"Don't," Cris simply insisted. "The replicators are offline."

Pursing her lips tightly to express her displeasure, Damhnait used her telepathy to explain, I've checked the records. All of our officers have been inoculated for Tarkalean flu. Now, there is a plan in action to non-violently subdue the Enforcers into unconsciousness with anesthezine gas, but for it to be successful, the Sulu's crew must remain conscious. We need medicinal laporalyn to do that, but we don't have any in storage.

Subconsciously affected by having been married to a chef for so many years, Fortu's expressions slipped into Damhnait's statement: What we do have are the chemical ingredients that you will need to bake a big batch of laporalyn.

Fear spiked in Cristobel's chest, causing a telepathically blurted, What about the Enforcers?

They have allowed continued usage of this laboratory, because the door leading directly to the corridor has been sealed, and no more than one person is allowed to work in here for extended periods of time, Damhnait assured him.

Her determined expression became marred by a pained grimace. Cristobel sighed, because he couldn't hide from her sympathy, the way he could telepathically hide from anyone else. Damhnait delicately reached a hand to his neck, and said, You've already been collared. They wouldn't see you as much of a threat.

So you want only me to create the laporalyn? Cris asked to be sure. He didn't want anyone else involved. Not like last time.

You will begin the project, Ensign Kremer will take over during Beta, and Ensign Szerda will continue during Gamma, Damhnait replied. The Enforcers don't have the medical knowledge to differentiate laporalyn from a curative for Tarkalean flu. Once the chemical is prepared, it will have to be manually loaded into dual hypospray cartridges. Half of the cartridge will be filled with laporalyn, the other half with a placebo for the Enforcers. We should still be able to get multiple shots out of each cartridge, but the dosage level will have to be adjusted for each different species aboard the Sulu. Those adjustments to the hypo should cover for the switch from laporalyn to placebo and back again.

Cristobel nodded lethargically at each step of the plan, but then looked to her with dull suspicion. You're trying to keep me busy.

I know you will choose to stop and talk to me or a Counselor when you are ready. If I push now, you'll simply become contrary. I'd rather keep you productive and let you heal the way you know how, Damhnait admitted, desperately hiding how useless she felt she was to him right now. You're the first to express your emotions in almost any given situation - particularly in inappropriate mission situations - and yet you lose awareness of your emotions whenever it would do you good to express them knowledgeably.

It's a curse, I guess, Cris telepathically muttered. His own emotions such a blur, he easily missed that one emotion that Damhnait was trying to hide.

Worrying about the work awaiting her back in the main ward, Damhnait quickly requested, I want you to report to me with mental snapshots at regular intervals, no matter what I'm doing. I need to know that you're progressing successfully and that you're not getting distracted as the day goes on. And I need you to tell me each time if you want to continue with this project. Or if you want to stop. You can go back to my quarters any time you like.

Randomly recalling Corran's words about helping those that were still alive, Cristobel asked, What about the maturation chamber?

I'm still gathering resources. Start this project for now.

I will. For now.

---

"Snap, Part One"
By: Ensign Mason Farrell; Operations Officer
Chief Petty Officer Calyca Boothroyd; Engineering
Crewman Sorg Jurell; Security

Location: USS Sulu, Boothroyd's quarters
Stardate: 57910.20 08h10

***

There wasn't time for this. Part of him ached for Shyla. Nobody deserved to die like that, but there just wasn't time for any of the grief right now. Engineering had said Booter was in her quarters recovering. Part of him ached that he had to do this, but there was too much in motion to wait. Too much was at stake. And Booter was too integral to it all to be left alone as she deserved.

The object of his musing was pacing at the moment, which was a fairly unusual thing for her. She had a PADD in her hand and held against her chest and a doll with red hair and dressed in a uniform tucked under her arm. Comfort things really. She'd finally changed out of her blood splattered uniform, taken a shower and was dressed in loose pants and a t-shirt. Something she didn't have to replicate. But she wanted a uniform. She would have felt -- safer in one for some reason. Better prepared. She still looked awful despite the shower. Dark smudges brushed the undersides of haunted eyes and she looked rather pale.

But he'd hate himself later. For now, Farrell rang the chime.

She jumped and her head snapped up as the sudden noise seemed to blare through the silence of her quarters. With Sorg off to fetch them something to eat, she was going to have to face whoever it was alone. She had to take a conscious breath to calm herself before she could speak. The Enforcers wouldn't ring the chime.... Would they?

"C-Computer, who's requesting entrance?"

"Ensign Farrell is seeking permission to enter."

Caly breathed a sigh of relief and combed her fingers back through her hair. "Come."

Farrell was through the door and closing it before it had even finished opening. He stood a moment, scrutinizing her, the PADD, and the doll. "Mornin'," he said neutrally.

"Sir..." Caly nodded slightly and unconsciously held the PADD and doll closer to her. She felt...awkward. "C-Can I help you?"

"Sit down," Farrell said softly. He indicated a chair, and pulled another to be directly opposite it.

She hesitated... As much because it felt so odd to have someone else tell her to sit in her own quarters as it was because of the circumstances and the fact that he was even here. But she sat after a moment, perching on the edge of the chair and looking ready to bolt in a heartbeat.

"We got dealt a really shitty hand last night, Booter," he said. "I need to know you're still in the game."

"Still what?" She blinked, slightly confused and clearly not expecting the question. What game?

"I need to know you're still good to go. The spiders?" he encouraged.

"The spiders?" She continued to look slightly confused as her mind sorted through and catalogued the different things that had taken to tumbling around inside it since last night.

"The plan, Booter," he pressed.

The plan? She blinked and it took her another moment before her mind sorted through everything and the plan clicked into place. "Oh!" She jumped up and looked around in a bit of confused agitation. "Geezus.... Is that now?" She wasn't ready. She couldn't believe she wasn't ready. "I'm not ready," she looked at him a little helplessly.

Farrell stood with her, a little alarmed, and a little disgusted with himself for pushing. "Whoa, now, Booter. It's not now. Not right this second." He reached for her then, and touched her bicep as gently as he could.

She visibly flinched at the touch and pulled in a soft gasp. She didn't want to flinch, hadn't meant to, and was distressed that she had. It'd been instinctive and uncontrollable and she hated it the moment it happened. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Her distress was clearly evident in her voice and eyes and in the way her hand grasped for his. "I didn't mean to do that...."

He let her keep his hand. She seemed to need the contact. And whatever she needed right now, he was willing to give. She was too crucial. Unfortunately, he couldn't give her time.

"Booter, we need you focused," he said, as gently as he could.

Focused.... Focused.... She had to focus. And she tried. She'd been trying all morning. She searched again for the Periodic Table and still couldn't remember the very first one. Huge green eyes welled up with tears as he watched and when she tried to blink them back they spilled over the edge and clung for a heartbeat to her lashes before splashing onto her cheeks. "I...I c-can't remember the first element..." she told him inanely.

"You can't--" Farrell was puzzled at the statement. "Hydrogen?" he offered lamely.

She stood there, looking like a waif with her PADD and doll clutched to her chest and tears sliding down her cheeks. "I..." she blinked and the dawning recognition in her eyes was almost comical. "Hydrogen..." she repeated and looked lost for a couple heartbeats, but then her eyes cleared and she focused on him. Her hand still held onto his. "I knew that..." she told him in a 'duh, how'd I forget', kind of way.

The door slid aside and Sorg Jurell stepped through it with a laden tray in his hands. His smile of greeting vanished as his eyes flicked between Mason Farrell and Calyca Boothroyd and the grasped hands that linked them. For a split second Jurell's eyes took in the scene and his halted steps resumed. His eyes looked up at the officer holding his girl's hand and even though Farrell had a certain reputation, the man's stance and his expression belied only concern and sorrow.

Caly jumped at the sound of the door and if anything, she moved instinctively closer to Farrell, not relaxing until she saw who it was. That she was glad to see him back was evident in the depths of her eyes.

"Sir," Jurell nodded at the Ensign. He slid the tray to the table and looked at Caly. "You okay, babe?" he asked meaningfully.

She let out the breath she'd been holding and nodded. "Yeah, I'm okay," she assured him. "Just a little...." She looked lost for a moment. "Hydrogen," she told him.

Jurell smiled. "Did you remember or did someone give it away?" he asked her and looked at Farrell, his eyes flicking to their linked hands. He felt irrational jealousy for a moment before he stepped closer. "Breakfast." He indicated the tray. "You'd better eat." The unmistakable smells of hot food wafted across the room.

"I didn't remember," she answered and looked up at Farrell, offering him a faint smile. "Thank you, sir... I...I think I'm okay. When do you need me?" she asked and finally let go of him, turning back to Jurell with a quiet, "Thanks," as she made her way to the table.

"Contact me as soon as you're able," Farrell said, putting his hands behind his back. "I'm sorry to have to push, but it needs to be sometime today. The clock's tickin'." He turned to Sorg. "Get her rolling. We all need her."

Jurell nodded, though his eyes held a hint of warning for the Operations officer as he stepped closer to the man. "We'll be ready for what ever is needed, sir," his tone was quiet but adamant. "I'm sure you're aware of the situation more than I, sir, and if you don't object, sir, I'll be accompanying the Chief wherever she goes. It seems that they discovered a plan to utilize some of the ship's probes that had been ordered by Lieutenant Tagliesh. I'd appreciate a heads up if they intend to come looking for those involved. It seems Ensign Sefton was acting under the Lieutenant's orders and those orders resulted in the...incident."

"It was a good plan," Caly commented almost absently as she sat down and started picking through the food Jurell brought. "It still is."

Jurell shrugged, "Of course, the plan's merits aside...using probes amidst an armada of several thousand ships...who knows. It might have worked. We'll never know. I'd appreciate any warning you could give, sir... in case they come looking..." His eyes told Farrell that they would perhaps find more than they bargained for if they did come looking.

"I've got to go," Farrell said, giving Sorg an unimpressed look. "You're no fool, Sorg. Don't turn yourself into one over what happened last night." He started for the door. "The enforcers are prayin' for somebody to make it personal. Don't let it happen."

"It is personal, sir," he said, looking at the table where Caly sat and back at Farrell. "I don't intend taking any risks at all, especially with her, sir. You can count on that. We'll be ready when the time comes...not before. Anything I can do...just let me know, sir."

"I need to talk to Cristobel..." Caly muttered absently as she started to eat. She gave Farrell an absent wave when he left, her free hand already pushing buttons on the PADD. "Thoron particle masked probes," she held a mug of Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee out towards Jurell. "The Armada never would have known they were there and they would have gathered invaluable data on the gate for us. Come eat."

As the door closed behind the Operations officer Jurell made his way to the table. As he sat he said, "Thoron particle emissions are a high energy field used to block sensor scans, babe, you may not be able to scan what's inside the thoron field, but you sure as hell know it's there." He unwrapped the Bajoran breakfast cake and broke it in half, the steam from the cereal, fruit and nuts wafted upward. He put one half on Caly's plate. "It wouldn't have worked, Cal," he said, sipping the fresh coffee. "Tagliesh may be a good science officer, but as a tactical officer she's a waste of space...it was a dumb idea."

"You have to be specifically scanning for thoron particles to sense them," she pointed out. "And we sure can't launch any normal probes," she added, clearly thinking it could have worked but not prepared to argue about it. She offered him slices of the orange she was peeling. "What's it like out there today?" she nodded towards the door.

"Ugly," he replied. "Hostility everywhere, but at least it's controlled. You can feel it...the Enforcers are very alert. There was some action last night. You don't have to worry about the animal. He's dead. He was disciplined by our new captain."

Caly blinked and the bite of Bajoran breakfast cake paused halfway to her mouth. "Wait... She killed one of her own people?" Shock registered in the petite woman's eyes.

He grinned. "Word is that Captain Tebrianne Bancroft is a Starfleet Officer. She's on our side. She's Commander T'Kal's Betrothed, from a while ago. I don't know all the details, but she carved up the animal last night as an example to her crew."

She was glad... Really. She was glad... Wasn't she? Didn't she have to be? But if she was... Then why did she have this sudden and overwhelming resurgence of horror that had her stomach churning and throat tightening into knots and making it hard for her to breathe? "I-- Oh gods...." She choked and everything was dropped as she made a panicked rush for the bathroom, her chair clattering to the deck behind her and her hand clamped over her mouth.

---

"Snap, Part Two"
By: Chief Petty Officer Calyca Boothroyd; Engineering Crewchief
Crewman Sorg Jurell; Security Officer

Location: USS Sulu, Boothroyd's quarters
Stardate: 57910.20 08h45

***

Jurell sat in stunned surprise for a moment before he went after her. He found her doubled over in the fresher and he grabbed a glass of water from the fresher sink and stood behind her as she lost her breakfast. He didn't say anything as he rubbed her back and just waited until she finished.

She was thankful that she hadn't eaten that much. She was pale as a ghost and her hand shook as she reached to grab hold of a towel, bringing it down to cover her face as she sat back and leaned against the bulkhead with a soft groan.

Jurell squatted down before her and offered the water. "You okay?" he asked gently. His blue eyes were filled with concern and one hand went to her knee.

Caly tugged the towel down from her face and took the glass with hands that trembled slightly. "No," she answered honestly and took a drink. "I... gods..." she groaned and leaned her head back against the wall again, handing the glass to him before she spilt it.

He took it from her trembling hands and frowned. He got up and wet another towel, rolling it up and placing it on her forehead as he squatted back down and took her hand in his. "You'll be fine," he said reassuringly, "it's just a shock reaction. Sometimes you don't know how wound up you are until something releases it. You were worried about him weren't you? Now you don't have to worry."

Caly shuddered and shook her head. "I w-was... But that's not why..." She rubbed her face with the towel as her eyes filled with unshed tears.

He clenched his jaw at the sight of her tears; he felt the lump in his throat as she was somehow hurting more and he couldn't do anything about it. "What is it then?" he asked gently. He squeezed her hand and watched the expressions on her face.

The horror she was feeling was still there around her eyes and she looked like she'd been handed something distasteful that she didn't know what to do with. "I was starting to find a way to...." She looked a bit helpless as she tried to find the right words. Her voice was quiet and a bit rough sounding. "... To catalogue them," she told him finally. "To put them, to put him where they belonged... In the 'bad guy' box..." she explained and took a breath, letting it out with a soft, distressed sound. "But she... She was a S-Starfleet officer..." her voice broke and two huge tears slid from her eyes as she looked at him.

He nodded, not really understanding the totality of what she was saying, but the gist of it made a kind of sense. "She had to do it, Caly. If she hadn't taken care of him, one of us would have...and it might have gotten very bad very quickly."

She knew that... Understood it. But it didn't change the fact that to her, a Starfleet Officer had acted in direct opposite to what she'd held as a truth and a constant. And the fact that she had to do it, somehow made it all the more horrible. She couldn't explain it, couldn't rationalize it, couldn't even except it really. And now she couldn't trust the woman. It was all there, reflected in the depths of her eyes for him to see. "I-I know..." was all she said, all she could say.

He just nodded and reached for her, drawing her into an embrace. Her whole world was turning on its end and all he could do was try to take care of the parts of it that he could reach. "We'll get home," he whispered.

She let out a strangled sound as she moved into his arms and held onto him. If that was what it took to survive.... "I... I c-can't be that..." she told him, knowing that no matter how tough she was, she'd never survive here if she had to turn into what Tebrianne had become. She just didn't have it in her. The welled up tears silently fell then and she just held tightly to him.

"I wouldn't want you to be," he told her softly. "There's no need for you to be," he said, knowing that he'd never allow that kind of taint to touch her. "I love you just the way you are."

But what if they got stuck here? She was afraid to ask the question. She was momentarily confused because she didn't totally understand his response. She rubbed her face against the confusion and shook her head a bit. "She was a Starfleet officer..." she said again, unable to comprehend.. Starfleet officers just didn't behave like that....

"She's been here a long time, Cal," he said, knowing now what she meant. "A long time... we're not going to be here that long, babe...don't fret."

She nodded, but she was still horrified and it showed in the depths of her eyes as she looked up at him. "L-Let's get out of here..."

He smiled and lifted her as he stood. "The fresher isn't the best place to have a talk," he agreed.

"It's an awful place," she agreed and held onto him, her arms wrapped securely around his neck. "You need to finish eating too," she reminded him. And she needed to do something before she went crazy. When she had told Jurell everything felt surreal, she'd meant it. It still felt that way, even now there was a part of her that expected to wake up any moment and everything would be back to normal. Only now she wasn't quite sure what normal was.

"It'll be okay," he said firmly, gazing into her green eyes. "You'll see. Have a little faith, Cal. I won't let them hurt you again." He carried her out of the fresher. It seemed that he was getting used to this...she was a very light burden to carry.

She studied his eyes, hers sad, troubled, and still haunted. "I think I've lost my faith," she admitted quietly and her voice quieted to a whisper as she repeated her previous answer to that. "You may not have a choice." She cupped his cheek with a warm hand, unsettled because of how much she knew that would affect him. "I'm sorry."

"We always have a choice," he said back to her, "that's what makes us who we are."

Something in his words acted like a dash of cold water on her and her demeanor changed. "You know what? You're right," she agreed and wiggled free of his arms. "We do always have a choice."

He let her go with a bemused expression on his face and followed her.

Once her feet were on the ground, she made her way back to the table to retrieve her PADD and the doll before settling on the sofa. "And you know what else?" she looked over at him. "That's what makes it so damn hard for me to understand your automatic defense of our unwanted captain."

He stood a few paces away from her and frowned. How could he sum up what he felt? Or why he thought the way he did. "Call it gut instinct," he finally managed. "She's a Starfleet Officer and she's been here five years from what they say. This place is brutal. We already know that. Sometimes a person needs to make a choice they don't like in order to survive. We always have a choice, so if she didn't want to change, or she decided to make a stand on Starfleet principles...she most likely would have died a long time ago. Why die for principles that no one here understands? Or why die when your death won't make a difference? We can all choose different reasons to spend a life. My choices would be different from hers - because I'm me...but in the end, she did what she did - and does, in order to survive. If I had to do that...I don't know...but if I knew that acting the part of one of them would save one hundred and fifty of us...or even just you from living that kind of life...I'd do it in a hot second."

She stared at him as he spoke, her eyes huge and greatly troubled. She was upset and cranky and angry. "So then. Sometimes it's okay to cross the line and become them? Or is there just no line? Or is it that we get to put it where we want when we want and then all the rest of the time get on our high horse and spout moral platitudes?" She rose to her feet and started pacing around her quarters. "Three days ago... Hell, maybe it's been less... I don't even know anymore... But you chastised me, Jurell." She paused to look over at him. "You lectured me on the 'Proper Way for Everything'," she reminded him. "Do you remember what you said? Because I do. Every word. You said... It's what sets us apart from them. The way we go about doing things says who we are. Actions speak louder than words, and how we act tells the universe that we're the good guys. It's important. It's what wins us respect, and even our enemies know that we keep our word, honor our promises and are bound by our treaties. You can't win trust in an enemy by laying aside the rules. Even if they do," she repeated what he said, verbatim. "She may have been a Starfleet Officer. But she willingly left that behind when she crossed the line and laid aside the rules. She did what she had to do to survive... And I can respect that, can pity her for that." She was visibly upset as she paced and talked, gesturing with her hands and the doll, her fingers moving abstractly in the air. "But don't defend her to me when she turned around and did the same thing to Crix that he did to Shyla. And do not ask me to put my trust in her, because I won't. My trust and my loyalty goes to my Starfleet Officers. Not someone who is partially responsible for the position we're in right now." She took a breath. She was shaking and tears were streaming unnoticed down her face.

He was amazed that she remembered what he'd said word for word, and even now when she'd repeated it to him he smiled and nodded. Stepping up to her he reached out and held her by the arms. "I also said, that the choices I would make would be different. I'd stand by what I believe in no matter what. I'd be dead for it too. I'm not asking you to put your trust in that woman, Cal, I'm asking you to put it in Lyrr, and T'Kal and Thaine, and Salinger. Commander T'Kal is a man I trust, and he asks for us to cooperate." He reached up and touched her cheek, and felt a swell of pride in her. She was so much like him in the way she thought. "We never really know how we'll react when our time comes. We can only hope that what we hold dear is worth the sacrifice. If I were in her place right now...this minute, and I knew that to play a part as she's doing would save my fellow Starfleet Officers from this place, I'd do it. I'd have to. It would be for the good of the many. If it was just me, alone in this place. I know that I wouldn't be able to do that. It's not who I am."

He took a deep breath and gazed into her troubled green eyes. "I'm so proud of you. To know that you feel as I do, and think the same as I about what we're doing in this uniform. I can't tell you how much that affirms what I am and why I do it."

Caly listened to him, half ready to snap irritably at him when he took hold of her, and even more ready to snap at him when he tried to deflate her argument. "You don't have to ask me to put my trust in Lyrr or Thaine, or Salinger. I'm already doing that. I'm suspicious of T'Kal though, and I'm sorry for that. But I'd suspect anyone's judgment who was dealing with a former lover in the situation we're in." She was still upset, still angry, and still crying. "And dammit, stop defending her!" She drew in a shaky breath. "She crossed the line. Which shows what she is willing to do. Do you trust her, Jurell? Trust her to choose the crew over herself if it came down to it? I don't. She wants to go home. And that is what motivates her. And now she has an opportunity. And she has to have us to help her achieve her goal. As far as I'm concerned, her motives are self-serving. And do not call her a Starfleet Officer. Because if she's a Starfleet Officer and what she's doing is acceptable, then what the hell does that make us? Are you willing to take back what you said? Is it okay now to act like them? Shall we start butchering them like Crix did Shyla and like she did Crix? Where's it stop? Where's the line get drawn now?" She drew in a shaky breath that was nearly a sob. "And dammit, don't try and diffuse me," she grumbled.

He dropped his hands away from her and seemed deflated. "I agree with you, Calyca, I'm not arguing against what you're saying, and no I don't trust her! You're right...and I'm not trying to diffuse you. I was just trying to tell you how what you're saying makes me proud of you. There's no reason to be angry at me. I'm sorry." His voice was totally reasonable, and he knew that stress often resulted in wild mood swings, and she'd been through a lot. She wasn't really angry at him, and like her, he didn't trust their new captain either.

He was right. She wasn't really angry at him. Although his argument seemed to confuse her because one minute it looked like he was defending Tebrianne and the next, he wasn't. She drew in an audible breath and rubbed her face, her hand continuing upwards to comb through her hair. "I'm not really angry at you," she admitted. "I'm angry at what seems to me as your constant defense of her." She crossed her arms under her breasts and hugged the doll to her chest defensively. "It's just.... If I can defend her actions and still see her as a Starfleet Officer, then I don't know where the line gets drawn anymore... And that scares the hell out of me. It scares me more than a hundred Crix's." She lifted a hand to rub harshly at her eyes. "I'm sorry."

He nodded. "I was only meaning that I could understand why she would do what she's done. I pity her. She gave in to weakness and now perhaps she wants to make up for it. Perhaps she's trying to redeem her bad choices and save the crew of the Sulu. Maybe a lot of things I don't know about. Being Starfleet doesn't make you perfect, Cal. I pity the woman for what she's done, but I'll use her to accomplish a goal if that goal is to get us home. She's compromised her ideals as a Starfleet Officer - and she did it because in this universe these bastards are Starfleet...just not our Starfleet. They are the opposites of everything we believe in."

Caly shook her head. "No... They're not Starfleet, Jurell... They're some warped Empire thing. I can understand why she did what she did. Why she made the choices she did. It's the path she took to survive. I pity her too. Because her legacy will never be what a wonderful Starfleet Officer she was. It'll be what she compromised, what she let herself do in order to survive," she told him, watching him and feeling as defensive as she looked. "I never said perfect. But there is a certain set of standards and ideals and principles that Starfleet Officers believe in and uphold... I believe and agree with everything you said to me the other day. I just don't want to feel that...slipping from our grasp."

"It won't," he affirmed. "We both won't allow that." He gave her an encouraging smile.

She sighed softly and rubbed her face again. "I have a horrid temper... And I feel like shit... And I want to bite everything that moves. And I'm cranky enough to want to have PMS so I can be even more cranky," she admitted. "I'm sorry if I said anything that hurt you."

"You didn't hurt me," he smiled kindly. "If that was a temper tantrum, it was pretty mild...not even close to Chief Case on a good day. I can't wait to see you really worked up." He grinned. "At least we've firmly established a very important point. We both have the same ideals. That's a good thing."

Caly gave him a look. "It wasn't a temper tantrum. It was a righteously angry, well spoken and delivered dissertation," she informed him. "The horrid temper was just a warning," she admitted and then shook the doll at him. "We seem to have the same ideals," she agreed. "Just so long as you don't justify or defend her to me again. She is the one who brought Crix on board our ship," she added with a slight huff. "And while we're on the subject," which of course, they weren't, and she fwapped him on the arm with the doll anyway, "what the hell's up with all this 'babe' and 'baby' shit? Is that a Bajoran thing?"

"Well who's playing with dolls?" he asked with a grin. "Don't you like it? It's just a term of endearment.." He shrugged. "I thought you liked it."

"I'm protecting my virtue here." She shook the doll at him again. "It's okay, I suppose. It just sounds kinda weird coming from you. I'd expect something more... more...Bajoran..." she offered. "I guess it's growing on me," she admitted.

Jurell laughed. "If I spoke Bajoran to you, you wouldn't understand me and the meaning would be lost in explanations. It's just easier to speak Standard. How is that protecting your virtue? I haven't even...I mean...we haven't...it hasn't been...well...." He stopped, his face was turning red. "Your virtue is not being threatened," he finished.

"Oh yes it is," she pointed and shook the doll at him again. "Little-me here is anatomically correct," she explained to him. "And I'm a bright girl, yanno." She started to poke him with the doll again, thought better of it, and tucked it back under her arm. "I can get the meanings of things once you explain it to me."

He looked at the doll as it went under her arm. "Why have you got an anatomically correct doll of you?" It seemed a very weird thing to have, and now he considered it, the doll did have rather large.... He tore his eyes away and gave her a raised eyebrow. "Humm?"

"Potts," she answered simply and eyed him eyeing the doll.

"Potts...." It was a question. "What has Potts got to do with an anatomically correct doll of you?" There was a slight curl to his lips as if the whole concept was suddenly very absurd. He'd heard rumours about Potts. Potts was a Deltan, and everyone knew about Deltans.

Caly pulled the doll out and started gesturing with her as she spoke. "He replicated her," she explained. "When I went to see him in the middle of the night."

"Potts replicated an anatomically correct doll of you. Why?" Now he sounded suspicious. "In the middle of the night?"

"Yes, in the middle of the night," she nodded her agreement. "And to make me laugh, I think. It worked too. And to put certain things into perspective.... Kind of."

"Put what into perspective?" He was still puzzled over why a counsellor would want to replicate an anatomically correct doll for her to make her laugh, or to put...something into perspective.

"The conversation we were having," she explained. "It's one of those standard, hokey kind of therapeutic things counsellors do that works in the right circumstances but is funny out of context."

"Uhuh...." He sounded extremely skeptical. "In the middle of the night."

"Well... The wee hours of the morning, actually," she clarified.

"You don't want to tell me...why?" Jurell asked as he sat at the table and sipped the semi-cold coffee.

Caly blinked. "I am telling you," she protested. "I've answered every one of your questions without going into a lot of detail. But then you haven't asked for any," she pointed out.

"Okay...I'm asking." He bit into the Breakfast cake and chewed, crumbs falling to the plate.

"Oh.... Well.... I had a nightmare the night... Uhh...early morning after we went to the Jazz club. It woke me up and then I couldn't go back to sleep and I was restless and unsettled so I checked to see if there were any counsellors about and Potts was in his office and free. So I went to talk to him," she explained and settled back onto the couch. "About things and us and relationships and puzzles and schematics and stuff. He replicated the doll when he replicated the orange blanket. And we talked while I guarded her virtue. And when I left, I couldn't leave her there, sooo... I took her with me," she added. It was all very simple really. He always thought she was keeping things from him, or trying not to tell him things and she never could quiet figure out why that was because she really told him everything. She was unaware that her delivery left a lot to be desired and he was unaware that she told him things as they came to the forefront of her mind. It was just that some things were slower to get there than others. So that in the end, what she was saying made perfect sense to her, while it...lacked something and was rather fragmented to other people.

He listened as he ate, breaking the cake into morsels and eating with his fingers, until she got to the us and relationships and stuff. He stopped chewing and swallowed. She'd gone to Potts to talk about their relationship...and he'd replicated an anatomically correct doll of her...why? To talk about sex? She'd said that she hadn't kissed a guy before...but surely.... He frowned slightly. "So...what was it about us that you had to talk about?"

"Well... That's a wee bit complicated..." She motioned with the doll and then tucked her back into her lap after a moment. "Sort of. Well, convoluted really," she added. "It was mostly about relationships... And well...you. And Shiri--" Her voice trailed off a bit. "And the giant black dragonfly that attacked me," she tossed in. "See... It's just... I don't do relationships. They confuse me. You confuse me," she admitted. "You and Shiri confuse me. And I thought... If I could just get the right tools to sort everything out.... And Potts would have them. He's a counsellor and he's had a lot of relationships himself," she explained.

"Hmmm Shirik and I?" His frown deepened. "We're just friends - that's all. I'm not interested in dating Shirik. She's not my type. She never was - only I didn't realize that because I hadn't really gotten to know her. I know her better now, and I know that she's not my type of woman. I don't have any interest in her except as a friend." He smiled. "You on the other hand...that's entirely different. You are entirely different. You I am interested in." He gazed into those beautiful green eyes and paused for a heartbeat. "I know you said you don't do relationships...but we are in one...and I'm not about to stop now. I couldn't if I wanted to...and I don't want to...ever."

She looked at him for a very long time before saying anything. Her thoughts were a little scattered but slowly coming to some kind of organized chaos she could deal with, and she wondered if they should even be having this conversation right now. The errant thought didn't stop her from answering him though. Or rather from giving him more of a glimpse into those wandering thoughts of hers. "I know we are. And I don't know how to deal with that," she admitted. "Shiri bothers me because just two months ago you told me you loved her... She told me you loved her. And I saw the way you looked at her," she told him. Her fingers were moving in that way they did when she was trying to work through something. "I saw the way her dance with T'Kal bothered you. And I saw the way she looked at you. And I knew, despite T'Kal, and despite her protests, that she was attracted to you more than she let on. Even after the party, I thought there was a chance that you'd get together and she'd find happiness and be able to put T'Kal behind her," she continued in a soft voice. "I don't understand being in love with someone two months ago... And not being in love with them now..." she told him truthfully. "How do you know you don't still love her? How do you know that I'm not some wacky substitute? Don't they have a name for that?" She was so bad at relationships and relationship issues, but Psych 101 had been part of her course schedules. "How do you know you're not on the 'rebound', Jurell? If you were wrong two months ago... Can't you be wrong now? I don't want to be a substitute for Shiri. And I can't sit here and say with complete honesty, that... That part of me doesn't feel that way, isn't afraid of that... And I can't say that part of me doesn't feel like Shiri just.... Pushed you off to me...." She shuddered a little and tried to smile, hugging the doll closer and feeling very vulnerable at the moment. She shouldn't have said anything. Not now. Not when she wasn't herself and not when she was already feeling so vulnerable.

He listened in silence and finally looked away from her and sighed. He sat back, digesting what she'd said, and the silence lasted for a span of seconds before he slowly nodded. "Okay, I can understand that," he said in a very soft voice. She was right in one way and wrong in another...and his eyes finally met hers as he pushed his plate aside. "You're right about everything you just said. The only difference I can add is that I thought I was in love with Shirik, but as I said, I really didn't know Shirik. I told you I loved her, yes, but that was to try to be fair to you...that I thought that I had feelings for Shirik.... I did, and I do...but they're not.. they aren't real. She has this way of acting that draws you in and makes you think she's interested and that's what she did with me...and all the while she was really only interested in T'Kal. She played me, Cal, and I didn't really know it. I was caught up in that act and for a short time I believed that there might be a chance for a guy like me, but that wasn't real. There never was a chance...not with her. But it was the idea of a chance that made me look at her that way, but it was only ever superficial. She never let me get close, and she never let herself get close to me either - so we never really got to know each other...so it wasn't love, only I thought it might be the beginning of that, but it wasn't. Then I met you...and even though I thought that I might be in love with her...I fell in love with you." He admitted it. It was in his eyes, the way he looked at Caly, right then. The truth. Naked and bare, and no pretense about it. "I'm in love with you, Caly. Really. Not a rebound. Never that. I know what I'm feeling is real, and it's not the same as what I felt about Shirik. It's deeper than that. We...just fit...and I know. I'm sorry...but it's the truth. I love you. I'm in love with you." He sat back and took a deep breath. "There...I said it." He looked worried.

Now it was her turn to listen in silence and finally look away, down to the doll that did bear a remarkable resemblance to her. His admittance hadn't shocked her like it might have because it wasn't the first time he'd said it. And even though she'd tried to ignore it, she'd heard every time he'd even hinted at it. She looked back at him finally, her eyes troubled and still very haunted looking. She drew in a breath and let it out in a soft huff. "How do you know though?" she asked him. "How can you be so sure? How do you know if you know me any better than you knew Shiri? Do you know me?" She watched his face, looking at him, studying the artic blue of his eyes, hers echoing all the questions she was asking. "I... I don't want you to be in love with me, Jurell..." she admitted frankly. "It scares me. I don't know what to do with it... And I can't say I'm in love with you. I don't even know what love is. Right now it feels like... Pressure," she told him, her eyes pleading now, confused and seeking some kind of understanding, some kind of order. "Like now I have to do things, right? And be certain ways? I don't know if I can... I don't know how..." she was starting to ramble now and looked slightly agitated. "I'm scared. I don't want to be in love with you. I'll screw up and you'll leave and then where will I be in two months? And I know that sounds selfish... But I can't help it..." Her eyes were filling up with tears again, but they just pooled along her lower lids and refused to fall.

He was getting confused more by the second. "Why do you think you have to do anything other than be who you are?" he asked with a frown. "I don't feel this way because you suddenly need to change! If you changed I probably wouldn't feel like I do. I don't want to pressure you at all. I certainly don't want you to change! Okay you're forgetful, so what? I have a hard time remembering dates, and names escape me for the first three times at least...and I happen to not mind having to remind you. It's one of the things I adore about you...the way your mind works is amazing. I can't hope to do the things you do, but I don't want to either. I'm happy with you the way you are. Why do you want to change anything? Do I know you? I'm learning to know you...reciting your family history, where you went to school, what grades you got, what you studied.... That's just facts I can read them anytime...but I know you...the way you draw little schematics with your fingers when you think or when you don't want to think. I know you get absorbed in little details, and recite the table of elements when you get scared or upset, and say what you mean and mean what you say. I know we believe in what we're both doing, and you'll stand by that no matter what - like I would. I know I confuse you and confound you and I know you like being held, and I know you like it when I kiss you, or when I look in your eyes and see the way you look at me too. I can't breathe properly when you do that. I can't think straight when you kiss me...and I know you can't either...and how could you possibly think you'll screw up when all you have to be is you?" He took a deep breath and wondered where it had all come from. Ttalk about blurting! "I don't need you to change...and I can't help the way you make me feel. If you need space...I'll understand." His eyes told her he really wouldn't understand, but he'd do it anyway.

Cal just sat there, silent and listening, flinching very slightly on occasion. About halfway through she lifted a trembling hand and pressed her fingers to her lips as she continued to watched him. She shouldn't be having this conversation now. She felt raw and vulnerable and she knew her mind was a jumbled mess emotionally. She felt like he was chastising her even though she was pretty sure he wasn't. He didn't answer all her questions, but he did answer some. She didn't have any more clarity now than she did before he spoke. She blinked and the tears that had been pooled for so long on her bottom lids spilled over and slid slowly down her face. She pulled her fingers from her lips and held her hand out slightly in his direction, an unconscious plea in her body language. "I n-need s-something..." she admitted with a voice that broke. "I... I c-can't deal with this right n-now. Everything's so...mixed up.... I feel so... Raw inside."

He was out of his chair the moment the tears started to fall and he knelt beside her, taking her hand and cupping her cheek. "What is it?" he asked her gently. "If I can give anything..." His eyes told her that he'd give her anything she asked...anything at all.

"T-time..." She stared into his eyes, hers so troubled and haunted they were nearly translucent. "And... And that s-space you don't really want to give," she told him.

He drew in a breath and nodded. "Sure," he agreed. "You want me to go?"

Caly blinked in confusion. "Uhh... N-no..." And then it occurred to her that he might want to leave. "You don't have to stay if...if you'd rather not..."

"I want to stay." He stood up beside her, and realized just how big he was beside the girl. "But what do you want me to do?"

She tipped her head back so she could look up at him. "I already told you," she answered with some confusion.

He smiled. "Okay...the meaning of space...is what? That I should go...or that I should drop any reference to how I feel about you...or that I should...what?"

If it was at all possible, she looked even more confused. She let her breath out in a soft huff and leaned her head back on the sofa. "I don't know," she finally admitted. "This is all... Beyond me. But... I don't want you to go. I don't want to be alone."

He nodded. "Okay. I don't want to leave you alone...but I will...metaphorically, not actually if you know what I mean."

"Not really," she smiled a bit wanly. "Just... Just don't expect anything from me right now. Okay?"

"I never expect anything from you, Cal." His tone was sincere and very gentle. "I didn't expect any of this...not really. I don't know what's going to happen, or where anything is going. I'm just as confused as you are right now, I think. I'll be with you, because I don't want to leave you alone because being alone right now isn't safe...but I'll respect that you want some room...and no pressure...and I'm sorry because I didn't mean to crowd you or put any pressure on you. I didn't mean for this. It just...happened." He sighed and sat at the other end of the sofa. "Just think of me as your Tool Caddy for a while." He smiled and chuckled. "Just don't call me T.C."

Caly watched him with troubled green eyes. There was a slight, perpetual frown marring her brow now that sometimes bordered on a scowl. She noted where he sat without any expression at all, save for a very slight deepening of that frown. "T.C. doesn't fit you." Her eyes lifted to meet his. "Being a Tool Caddy can be nice actually. I do it myself sometimes," she admitted. "Don't be sorry."

He looked at her and gave her a smile. He nodded. "Okay," he said softly. "You know...with that look on your face...." he mimed a very deep frown that made his Bajoran brow ridges furrow, "I could make you an honorary Bajoran."

She blinked and the frown deepened as she looked down at her nose a little cross-eyed and then back to him. "I didn't know you could make those deeper," she pointed to his brow ridges and then lifted her hand to rub her own brow. "I'm cranky and have a bit of a headache," she explained. "We need to go to sickbay so I can talk to Sefton." She sighed and rose to her feet. "I need another shower first... I feel so...dirty," she told him, giving him a wan little smile before padding towards the fresher.

---

"Finding Lektar"
By: Ensign Raina Derrell; Medical Officer
Ensign Mason Farrell; Operations Officer
Ensign Shirik Lektar; Operations Officer

Location: USS Sulu, Derrell & Lektar's quarters
Stardate: 57910.20, 09h05

***

Lektar wasn't at the cargo bay. She wasn't in her quarters. No messages had been left in the memory sectors they'd staked out. Farrell even tried a few other combinations of Rennari dates, just in case. The date of Shardra Veina's acquisition of her prized stallion (he'd snickered at the Rennari word for that) was a no-go. Equally blank was the memory sector corresponding to the date she'd ordered the blood sacrifice of her bastard, and only, son. By the time he'd gotten to the date of the Blood Queen's handmaid's ordered betrayal of a potential betrayer (a particularly juicy tidbit from the biography), he decided there was nothing to be found in the computer core.

Which meant he struck out to find her the old-fashioned way: look.

The computer said she was in her quarters, and her roommate, Ensign Derrell, was not. The door was easy enough to manage. Farrell had created an override door code for himself his first night aboard that duplicated the code of whoever actually owned the door, so when no one answered the chime he let himself in. She'd probably stab him in the dark, but sickbay was open.

The room was empty. Of living beings, anyway. The room's actual contents spoke to something unpleasant having happened recently. On one side of the room was Derrell's bunk, the bed neatly made, her personal effects on an end table. Lektar's bunk was the obvious other one, but it was a mess. The sheets were rumpled, but not pulled down. Someone had been on the bed, and moving, but no one had actually slept. In fact, it looked rather like someone had shed. A mass of white hair was strewn across the mussed blanket. Lektar's uniform and boots were on the floor, as was her combadge. This concerned Farrell, and he picked it up and put it on the table.

He placed the badge next to a cup half-filled with cold klaas, which didn't smell quite as bad when it wasn't steaming. It was then that he noticed the table. A hole had been punched through the tabletop, completely and cleanly. It was slender, and barely triangular. A knife? Punched completely through the surface? A vibroblade, he supposed, could do that, though the hole wouldn't be as clean. Vibroblades could cut through a number of surfaces, but did so messily. Blades that moved in your hand were difficult to keep on a straight plane. Maybe if someone jammed it hard, such that it was forced through quickly, and then turned it off.

This was not good. Not good at all.

Raina had just returned for a very late and extremely unsettling evening. All she wanted was to get some sleep. However as soon as she walked into her quarters something was beyond wrong. "What's going on here?"

"That looks to be the question of the hour," Farrell said absently, picking up the combadge again. "Lektar's missing, but she left everything but her skin behind." He indicated the clothing and the bed of hair. "Any idea where she's gone? If she gets caught without a communicator, she's sunk."

A frustrated sigh escaped. "Sorry I don't..." Raina got a good look at her roommate's side of their quarters than made a rather hasty dash for the restroom. Several incidents had left her normally rock solid composure with a lot of chips in it. This latest incident only shoved her over the edge. It didn't matter that her last meal was more than several hours earlier, Raina still got violently ill.

Farrell looked at the combadge in his hand, then stuffed it into a pocket. Wherever Lektar was, she could keep for another few minutes. He moved to stand just outside the bathroom door, allowing speech while respecting privacy.

"Derrell?" he ventured when she seemed to finish heaving.

Trying to pull herself back together Raina slowly asked, "What?"

"Everything alright?"

Raina emerged from the restroom, tired, looking haunted and extremely upset. "Do you have any idea where I just came from?" she spat. As her eyes traced the displaced quarters around her she continued, "All this with my roommate going on at the same time as I'm forced to do one thing I'd never touch with a 1000 foot pole."

"Forced?" Farrell questioned. "I don't understand. You mean the Tagliesh thing?"

The medical officer simply nodded. "There's no way to have carried on without proper medical assistance. Even though I know she'd have done so anyway. What you and others seem to be missing is the fact that's not a joke or even an element of my time on Yassir I care to remember. So I'd never wish that on anyone even on the darkest day. Sure I hate what's happening," Raina was referring to their current status with the Enforcers and the way Sulu's crew was being treating, "In fact I loathe it. My passion in that category goes deeper than many can understand because of my experiences on Yassir."

"Whoa, now," Farrell said, holding up his hands. He probably shouldn't have asked, but did before he could think too much about it. "What happened on Yassir?"

For a moment Raina bit her lip then responded, "The Cardassians happened. One of the guards..." She couldn't say it out loud though it was clear Derrell had actually been through what Xayella was pretending to.

Farrell moved his hands to touch both his temples for a moment. "Oh, no," he said slowly. "Ensign Derrell. . . I had no idea. Why didn't you say 'no'?" He shook his head. "To me, I mean."

"You needed me," she commented simply.

He thought on that for a few moments. "I can respect that," he said, then seemed to remember where he was. "And I think I may need you again. What do you make of this?"

Raina took a good look at where he was pointing. Hair and other items lay as evidence to something very heinous indeed. "This is not good. We need to find Shirik now." The fact that she'd resorted to using her roommate's first name was an indicator of how dire the situation truly was.

"Any ideas?" asked Farrell.

***

Shirik heard the chime and stiffened in the darkness. It took a moment for her to convince herself that it wasn't an Enforcer. They wouldn't bother ringing the chime, they'd already be inside, dragging she and Saavar from bed. Saavar was still asleep, recovering form his injuries, and she carefully slipped from the bed to answer the chime before he woke.

She grabbed up the only piece of clothing in the room that was hers, the white robe with the bloodied sleeve she had left on the floor in the bathroom. Tying it around herself, she went to the door. "Enter."

She stood there blinking into the light from the hall, white hair unevenly hacked off at neck level, rumpled bloodied robe, slave collar around her neck, and a haunted look in her eyes. The room behind her was dark, making her look like some kind of ghost in her white robe. She looked confused to see Farrell and her roommate standing there.

"Sickbay's visitor list," Farrell quipped quietly to Derrell. "I'll never doubt you again." Both entered and the door closed behind them.

Raina looked at her roommate and wanted to get a better assessment, "I'd like to examine you just to be sure there's no serious damage and fix what they did manage."

"They already looked me over in sickbay," Shirik answered quietly. "I'm undamaged, physically. Saavar wasn't so lucky, he had to undergo surgery... he's sleeping right now." She clasped her hands together in front of her to stop their shaking.

"What in the world happened?" Farrell asked.

Shirik moved into the darkened room, to sit on the sofa. "Hadek paid me a visit in my room," she said. She explained what had happened, what he did, the padd he confiscated, and how she had gone to Saavar for help, and what happened after that. "After we were released from sickbay, we came here. Hadek's in the brig, and I'm supposed to report to Tebrianne's room in the morning under the guise of being her personal slave as my punishment. But I can continue my work from there without any Enforcers watching me."

"So the goons know there's a plan out there, but don't know who's involved, besides you two, and don't know the specifics?" Farrell asked, thinking hard.

"I didn't tell him anything, so they don't actually have any real proof of anything," she said. "They have my padd, which is heavily encrypted, but if they can decrypt it, they'll have the list of the team members..." she trailed off as the feeling of failure sunk into her once more, and the guilt over Saavar's injuries, for nothing. "Hadek said their computer expert is on it and should have results within a day, but I'm rather doubtful they'll have them that quickly. I tried to erase the files, but they had already copied them. At the moment, they only suspect myself and Saavar, although Hadek wanted Xayella to be interrogated, since she's Saavar's superior and he said something about other science officers who'd been caught plotting something..."

Raina was livid given the fact they'd let Saavar out of medical's supervision and he'd just had surgery. Shirik didn't look any better but from what she was hearing this whole thing was one great big mess. No hint of her previous night's activities showed when Xayella's name came up. "How long ago did all this occur?"

"About 7 hours ago or so... We were in sickbay by around 0300, and left around 0730. Saavar's all patched up, he just needs rest now. But he was beaten up pretty badly..." She trailed off again, as the images of that beating came unbidden to her mind once more and she shuddered.

"Wait a minute," Farrell said. "So their computer expert's decrypting your padd with the names of the away team members on it?"

"Attempting to, anyway," she said. "I encrypted everything with the new algorithms I'd been working on for security, that aren't recorded anywhere in the ship's systems yet, and the access codes to secure them are in Drokari." Farrell looked impressed, and she carried on. "The files were erased from my padd, but Hadek said they'd copied them. To where, I'm not sure."

"Hmm. That may be worth looking for. It'll take time to do it quietly." Farrell paused and thought, sucking the inside of his cheek. "Meanwhile, you're laying low in Bancroft's quarters, right?"

She nodded. "Tomorrow. Better than being in the brig. I'll probably be here the rest of today."

"Good. Stay there for at least a couple of days. Lay low and let the heat die down. We'll still be able to deal with planning via data drop," Farrell said.

"I expect to be there until we reach the Gate."

"Good. Stay out of sight." Farrell thought a moment again. "You say you've been cleared by medical?" he asked, glancing at Derrell.

She nodded. "As I said, I was physically unharmed but for some zapping. Saavar has been treated, and he just needs time to finish recovering." She paused. "I've been out of touch for a bit while all this was happening... But Hadek said something about a crew member from astrometrics being killed, something about scientists caught plotting something... What's been going on?"

"You don't know," Farrell said flatly, not as a question. He took a deep breath. "PO Moreau from astrometrics was killed by the main goon in engineering. Apparently she was helping Ensign Sefton and Chief Boothroyd in some project. The details are spotty. But Moreau died, and Sefton and Boothroyd both got taken to sickbay. I'm unclear on their status," he looked to Derrell.

Raina spoke for the first time in a long while, "Incredibly shaken is the best information I can give you right now. Not much has been said and I doubt it will be for a long time." In truth she had only spoken to Cris once since the incident and even then it was a very short conversation.

"Shaken? What happened?" Lektar said, now concerned about her two friends, Cris and Caly. "Were they hurt? Who did it?" She frowned. Communications were still a problem.

Raina noticed the look in her eyes. "They'll be just fine. Right now you just need to be worried about yourself."

"Have you spoken to the rest of our team?" she asked Farrell. "I'm concerned about the communications lack, and everybody has to be ready and know what's expected of them before we actually go."

"It's in process," Farrell said.

Shirik nodded. "I'm hoping we'll have time for a last planning session with the whole team once the Enforcers are taken care of."

"To plan what?" Farrell asked dryly.

Shirik gave him an odd look. "To finalize. It might be our only chance to sit down and talk about the mission as a whole team before we have to go execute it."

"What's to talk about? There's not much that can be planned until we're there. All we need is a go from team-members and a willingness to think on our feet. We can finalize things on the way. Right now, it's lay-low time."

Shirik shrugged. There didn't seem to be much more to talk about, with him. "Well, I need to get some rest myself, so if there's nothing else...?" She looked at both of them.

Farrell looked at Derrell.

Raina nodded to Shirik, reacting like the medical officer she was trained to be. "Yes you should. If you need anything don't hesitate to find a way to contact me." She'd seen more than enough in this mess already.

---

"There Is No Worse"

Ensign Cristobel Sefton, Medical
CPO Calyca Boothroyd, Engineering
Crewman Sorg Jurell, Security

Location: USS Sulu, Sickbay
Stardate: 57910.20, 09h30

***

Caly stepped into Sickbay with Sorg, somehow managing to seem smaller than normal and keeping away from the Enforcers posted at the door. Her pack was over one shoulder and she was dressed in a training uniform.

Uncharacteristically Sorg was subdued. He avoided eye contact and stayed close to Calyca. He didn't want to draw attention to her at all, yet his eyes took in the scene without missing anything.

She asked one of the passing nurses for Ensign Sefton's whereabouts and made her way over to his location once he was pointed out. She looked pale and there were dark smudges under eyes that still held that haunted look if one checked closely.

Sitting on the foot of a biobed, clad in his blood-stained Class A, Cristobel looked up to Calyca, and hardly noticed Sorg. He placed aside his PADD, on which he was monitoring his project in the life sciences laboratory. Its automated processes would be complete in fifteen minutes, and he would need to get back to it. Cris just appeared to be tired, despite a full night's sleep. "How are you?" he asked, utterly tentative.

Caly stopped before him, green eyes studying him quietly before answering, her gaze taking in the blood and the lines around her eyes tightening in response. "I'm.... Functioning," she answered quietly. Manganese, atomic number 25, atomic radius 124 pm. "How are you?"

"I'm... I'm here," Sefton said simply.

"Heh..." She slipped up onto the biobed to sit next to him. "Functioning?"

"Remains to be seen," Cris answered in a tone as uncertain as his words. He reached over for a medical tricorder to begin scanning Caly with it, without getting up from the bed.

Caly leaned over and tried to peek at the readings, but it was a half-hearted attempt at best. "What's the verdict?" she asked softly. The tricorder showed that she was still experiencing very slight muscle spasms every now and then and her brain electrical activity was a little more hyperactive than normal. What it didn't show was the unexplained tearing up she'd experience without any notice, or the emotional trauma she was attempting to bury for now. Nor did it show the bruising her spirit had taken. "Maybe I should use that thing on you?" She held her hand out for it.

"I was hardly touched," Sefton remarked ruefully, but handed her the medical tricorder anyway. "You're only going to find my bruises if you use a psychotricorder. And those went out of production over fifty years ago, because of their unreliability."

She took the tricorder and scanned it over him, not really looking at the readout because she was looking at him. "I think I could probably modify this thing to work," she offered casually. "But I don't think I need it." She sat the tricorder aside and offered him her hand, palm up. When he took it, she entwined her fingers with his. "I ache inside. My heart hurts and I can't always breathe," she admitted quietly as that familiar feeling crept over her face and her eyes filled with unshed tears. She had to take a breath before she could say anything else. "I should have done more to stop--" She drew in another breath that was difficult at best. "I think you feel worse than that."

"If you had done anything else, you would be dead," Cristobel said, sounding certain for the first time since Caly arrived. He wore a saturnine frown. "She wouldn't have wanted that."

Sorg stood motionless watching the two and listening intently. For all intents and purposes he wasn't really there. He examined Cris Sefton with his peripheral vision, and knew that he'd shared the incident with her, and irrationally he envied him that.

Caly nodded in acknowledgement. "I know..." she admitted. "But knowing doesn't stop the empty feeling that gnaws at my insides," she whispered softly, drawing in another breath and blinking back the tears that wanted to fall. "It wants her death to have some meaning..." she added with a quiet exhale and stared intently at their hands. Nickel, atomic number 28.

"Death never has intrinsic meaning," Cristobel asserted, blinking rapidly. Morosely, he went on, "Certainly not as much as each individual moment of life to come before it. Her life was lived as a Starfleet officer and a good person. That has meaning. ...And it's gone now."

She wasn't sure she agreed that death never had meaning, so she didn't comment. Not about that. "I'm sorry," she offered softly. "I know she was a friend of yours." The fingers of her other hand began moving slightly and she pulled in another breath. Her eyes were downcast and she was fighting back that urge to cry. She was marginally successful... Save for the lone tear that escaped her efforts and slipped from her eyes to splash down on the back of his hand.

Cristobel tightened every muscle he could think of, as if it would help force his telepathic senses inward and block everything else out. His non-perceptual empathy -- imagining how Caly felt -- was twisting him up inside like a contortionist as it was; he didn't think he could handle truly knowing the hurt she felt or the sympathy she felt for him. Not while he was on duty. He jumped up from the biobed, and used his free hand to take back the tricorder to distract himself with the LCARS display on its flat screen, but he didn't let go of Caly's hand. He just squeezed tighter.

That startled her and she jumped a little, her eyes huge and still mist-filled as she watched him with a fair bit of confusion. And then it dawned on her... He was Betazoid... A fact that she knew, but one that she never consciously thought of. "Oh Geezus... I should leave, huh?" she asked. "I... I don't want to... I don't want to make it worse for you," she said.

"There is no worse," Cristobel asserted in pained matter-of-factness. His black eyes were half-lidded, and seemed darker than usual, but then Sefton eyed Caly with sudden focus, as he remembered, "And you can't leave. You have to help me save the baby."

She was on the verge of doing something totally out of character and offer him a hug, but his words halted her. They made her blink and the shock on her face was real. "Wait... Wait... It's alive?"

"It's alive in stasis. I have..." Cris trailed off suddenly. Though he was more animated than he'd been all morning, Sefton dropped his voice to a whisper and stepped right into Caly's personal space. He couldn't allow anyone other than Calyca to hear him. "I have very rough schematics for a Federation maturation chamber. They are extremely confidential; I can't allow a single person more than is necessary to learn of them, but we're also going to need as many people as possible to get this built and actually functional in a very short span of time. Within forty-eight hours the stasis field's cumulative effects will become damaging to the fetus."

Caly blinked when he got right up into her personal space. And as she was sitting on the bio bed and he was standing now, they were close to being on eye level with each other. She thought for a moment, her eyes never leaving his and she answered in a hushed whisper. "Forty-eight hours is doable," she commented. "And since when does the Federation have a maturation chamber?" It was a rhetorical question and one that she didn't expect or give him the chance to answer. "I need to see the schematics..."

Cristobel nodded an, "of course," and then further shared, "My mother began converting private exam room two into a makeshift engineering lab last night. We have to keep everything in Sickbay. I don't think the Enforcers are going to care much, but the Daystrom Institute back home might be displeased by the sharing of their classified files. I might be looking at a reprimand. ...Of course, if we make it work, then we could very likely be decorated." It was a beautiful thing to escape his pain for a matter of moments, even though every few seconds the hurt threatened to return despite his busy mind.

"Just up my security rating for this if you need to. Although you might not," she tapped him lightly in the shoulder and gave him a faint smile. "I think we can make it work.... I've already got some thoughts... But I need to see the schematics. Hell, Sefton. We could probably design one ourselves," she winked at him.

"Do you think you'll be allowed to start work on this right away?" Sefton asked hopefully.

Caly thought for a moment and nodded. "Have Dr. Sefton order it," she suggested and then her voice lowered to a whisper. "And as long as I can continue to work on the gas releasing project, there won't be a problem. And being here would be a good way to keep me out of the watchful eyes of the engineering goons... Although now that Crix is dead that's not so much of a problem, I don't think."

"Give me five minutes, and then consider it an order from a senior officer. I'll let you pick out an engineering team. It's gotta be small and brilliant. Kinda like you," Cris offered, almost smiling. He set down his tricorder on the bed, and then gave Caly that hug she shied away from earlier. It made her squeak in surprise, but after a heartbeat of pause, she wrapped her arms around him and hugged him back.

When he released her and pulled back, she looked...not uncomfortable, exactly-- Well, sort of... It was more of a... 'Okay, that's over and wow... it wasn't as bad as I thought.' She gave him a faint smile and looked like she wasn't sure what to do with her hands so she settled them into her lap. "Five minutes, small team... Uhh... Got it."

"Be right back," Cristobel bubbled, and sauntered away. It was invigorating to have a purpose -- a chance to save part of Shyla -- but in the alone time it took just to walk to the Chief Medical Officer's office, the dark feelings began to creep along the edges of his thoughts. His shoulders slumped, and his pace became slower. The dark was never far away.

She watched him walk off, saw the slump of his shoulders and watched as he stepped into Dr. Sefton's office. She was troubled, imagining what it was like for him and knowing that it had to be so much worse than what she was feeling. He'd been Shyla's friend. Caly couldn't even imagine what it would feel like to lose a friend... And to witness... She shuddered and her gaze turned to find Jurell. She might not have looked at him while she'd been talking to Cris, or spoke to him... But she'd been very aware of his presence the entire time. Very aware. And right now troubled green eyes were fixated on him.

Jurell winked. His smile was barely present but it was directed at her none the less. It made her blink and her shoulders visibly relaxed as he watched. It was then that she gave him a faint smile that didn't totally reach her eyes. He could see she was still gravely troubled but for the time being was putting that aside so that she could function and do what she needed to.

The tall Bajoran watched the small engineer with more than a touch of concern. He knew just how close to the edge she was, and she surprised him with her tenacity to continue, even after their breakfast. She had guts.

She had a job to do. And if there was one thing Caly could do, it was perform to near perfection when under pressure. This, however, was a totally different kind of pressure, unlike anything she'd ever experienced. But she was adaptable, able to think on her feet, and totally capable of improvising. It was just taking her a bit longer to adjust than normal. She watched him for several moments longer before she pulled out her PADD and her attention went to it.

Space...the final frontier.... What did it really mean? Jurell cast his eyes on the Enforcers and back. They were alert and wary. So was he. Caly had asked for space...and Jurell had to respect that even if right now he didn't want to leave her for a second. He knew he had to back off, or he'd just lose her altogether. So he would. It was difficult, but he'd do it. She was vulnerable though...and she wore that damned collar. A collar that, even as he watched, she absently reached up and tugged at, her fingers slipping under to scratch at the irritated skin beneath it.

She continued to work on her PADD, whatever she was doing was holding her focus to the exclusion of everything else. Sickbay faded away. The Enforcers faded away. And even Jurell faded away. All that was left was her concentration, the project she was working on, and her itching neck.

Jurell wandered over to the duty nurse and asked her for something to soothe an itching collar, and he pointed at Caly and the thing she wore on her neck. The nurse nodded and gave him a tight knowing smile and went to a replicator, then went back to him. She gave him a small tube of ointment and he pocketed it. It wouldn't do for the Enforcers to see him trying anything untoward on the damned collar. He went back to watching her, mindful that he was supposed to be an engineer's mate...or tool caddy as she'd called him. He smiled at that. For a crack soldier and fearless fighter of the Great Resistance to a tool caddy...and he'd do it again in a hot second...for just one more look in those green eyes.

---

"Zareb's Baby"
By: Lt. Commander Benedict T'Kal
Lt. "jg" Jabari Zareb

Location: Port Nacelle Maintenance Gangway
Stardate: 57910.20 09h54

***

Benedict T'Kal stepped quietly onto the gangway that ran the length of the Sulu's port warp nacelle. He saw the man he sought at the far end, crouched over an open conduit panel and being assisted by another engineer. He walked the length of the structure and saw them look up at him and back to their work.

He stopped within a few feet of Jabari Zareb and nodded a greeting. "Lieutenant. May I have a word alone?" Ben nodded to the ensign who smiled and nodded.

"Not a problem, Commander," Jackson said affably before walking away.

Zareb didn't pull his attention from the conduit. "We have about three minutes before the enforcer makes it back around," Jabari said out of the side of his mouth. "If you lean down here with me, she might take you for Mister Jackson from a distance. She hasn't been walking the length of the gangway."

Benedict assumed the same position he'd see Jackson in, and he hurriedly tucked his ponytail inside the collar of his tunic so that his hair looked short to mimic the other man. He picked up a random tool for good measure and placed one hand on the rail, just high enough to hide his face from below. Benedict knew a little about hiding in plain sight.

There wasn't a lot of time, so he got right down to business. "We're putting together two Away missions for when we arrive at the Gate system. After we take out the Enforcers the TAC team has to leave the Sulu without being seen in a shuttle. We'll be surrounded by the Empire fleet, so the only vessel capable of it is your Nightingale. Commander Bancroft will lead your mission to the Windsor to rescue Salinger. With any luck you and the Nightingale can get close enough to beam the team aboard and get out clean before they even know you're there. You'll need Vijay."

"We need the Rio Grande to get the second team onto the Gate station and off again once they've done what they need to do. We'll need the decals changed on the Grande to mimic a craft from this universe. I was hoping you could manage that with help from a couple engineers. There's no Enforcers in the shuttle deck as everything is locked down. The second team consists of Ensign Lektar, myself, Farrell, Bennett, Commander Sefton, Boothroyd and Finn. We'll be getting the access codes for the Gate itself and making sure the station doesn't survive when we leave. There's a minefield around the Gate, the Nightingale should be able to slip through it...and meet the Sulu once you have the Captain. It's a tight operation with pretty severe timing...can I count on you?"

Zareb nodded slowly without taking his eyes from his work. "I will assist in any way I can," he said, finally. "But with regard to my ship, I will have to insist on several stipulations."

"They are?"

"Save for Ensign Vijay, the rest of the team will have to confine themselves to the midship module. The Nightingale has specialized equipment in the aft compartment and cockpit. Regardless of our circumstances, I cannot allow them access to it."

"No problem." Benedict nodded. "They won't need anything except a ride and to use the transporters once you're in range of the Windsor."

"Consider it done," Zareb said, arcing his spanner to send another fluctuation through the EPS grid. "She'll get the team where they need to go, Commander."

Benedict nodded. "Thanks, Jabari, I appreciate it. We'll try not to get her scratched." He gave the engineer a grin.

"If only that were up to you," Zareb sighed, managing to not bristle at the familiar tone. "Unfortunately, Ensign Vijay has shown a certain fondness for scratching my ship."

"I'd better get out of here." Benedict looked around and noted the Enforcer had yet to return. "Have a good day, Lieutenant," he grinned and nodded as he stood.

"Aye, sir," Zareb said, not to T'Kal but to the conduit.

Benedict strode away. He made it through the doors just as the Enforcer returned and glanced up at the Engineer. A second later Jackson walked back in hefting another tool. He held it up. "Forgot this," he said by way of explanation for his absence. The Enforcer just gave him a sour look and wandered off again.

---

"Unsettled"

CPO Patrick Riley, Engineering Transporter Crewchief
CPO Calyca Boothroyd, Engineering Crewchief

Location: USS Sulu, Sickbay
Stardate: 57910.20, 10h55

***

It was quiet in Sickbay and relatively calm. Sorg had gone off to get something for her to eat and Cris had stepped out for a few minutes. Caly wandered out of Exam Room Two, stretching her back and trying not to look over by the guards at the door. She had her PADD in her hands and was working on something even now. She was dressed in an old training uniform and her ball cap was firmly perched on her head. Every now and then a soft pop could be heard from her vicinity as she chewed and popped her gum.

***

Riley pulled the base plate from Biobed Four to take a peek inside. According to Doctor Sefton, it had been giving the nursing staff intermittent readings for two days now and with their lovely hosts meting out scads of 'discipline' amongst the crew so freely, Medical couldn't afford to wait much longer for it to be repaired.

"Hey.... Want a tool caddy?" Caly asked as she hunkered down beside him and peered into the bowels of the Biobed.

He turned towards her only to be greeted by a big expanding purple bubble that promptly burst when Booter chomped down on it. Paddy smiled and said, "Sure, Lass, but what are you doing in sickbay? I thought you were still in your quarters."

"Working to help Cristobel save Shyla's baby." She handed him his diagnostic meter. The eyes that looked at him were haunted despite her seemingly nonchalant demeanor.

The Irishman nodded sadly as he took the proffered tool. "A shame that...she was such a lovely young lady...." He wanted to say more about Shyla and Crix and revenge and vengeance, but their new captain had denied them any recourse in that arena.

Paddy bent over and hooked the tester to the bed's output computer interface while asking over his shoulder, "How are you, Booter...do you feel okay?"

Caly started to give him the automatic 'okay', but when she looked in his eyes, she couldn't. She drew in a soft breath and let it out in a little huff as she shook her head just a bit. "No," she answered honestly. "But I'll manage."

Cocking an eyebrow, he asked quietly, "Do you want to talk about it? Just...engineer to engineer?" His face showed a considerable amount of compassion, but the tone of the older chief's voice indicated that Caly was free to let the topic drop if she so desired.

"I'm not sure I can and stay composed," she answered after a moment and quite honestly. She sighed and offered him a wan smile. "I've... I've never seen anything like that, Paddy... I didn't realize people could--" She drew in a breath and shook her head, blinking to clear her eyes. "He enjoyed it..."

"Aye...he was a vicious bastard," Paddy reached out a consoling hand and laid it gently on her petite shoulder, "it's never an easy thing to see something like that done to someone...." His words trailed off, because deep down inside his heart, the Irishman knew they were inadequate for the pain Calyca was feeling right then.

She sighed softly at the touch to her shoulder, the stiffness in her easing some from it. She liked the older engineer and he always seemed to make her feel better. Maybe that was because he usually made her laugh. Just not today. She didn't think she could laugh today. "It's okay." She reached up a smaller hand to lay atop his. "You don't have to do that whole 'say something to make me feel better', shit." She gave him a faint smile and squeezed his fingers a little. "I hate the way Crix died..." she announced out of the blue. She was keeping her voice hushed so that only he could hear her.

Nodding silently, his eyes studied her for several seconds. "You think something else was more appropriate for him?" Riley locked eyes with Calyca as he awaited an honest answer from the talented engineer.

Caly drew in a soft breath and let it out in a quiet huff. "I don't know," she admitted honestly. "But the way it happened just feels all... wrong. Almost contrived..." she told him with a wry look. She dug in his pack and handed him a spanner. "I think Jurell was impressed with the way the she-bitch took care of it... It made me physically sick. I think I hate that people might see her in a positive light because of it."

"Contrived?" Riley glanced around before taking the spanner and edging closer. "Why do you think...that?" His voice had dropped to a whisper while his face took on a guarded look. Before Caly could answer the first question, he added quietly, "Don't be too hard on the Lad...a lot of Bajorans died during their world's occupation. And I think maybe they've forgotten what it's like to live without a war of one type or another."

The big man looked down at the biobed's pedestal. "I know a few 'fleeters' that can't seem to let go of that way-of-life either...."

"I'm not being hard... At least I don't think I am," she admitted and reached out a hand to rest on his forearm. "I don't mean to be. Are you that way, Paddy?" she asked him, releasing his arm so he could work and so as not to draw attention to them. "And 'contrived' as in it might make her look good to most people, don't you think? And if I wanted to be accepted, that would be one way to do it..."

He shook his head no, then reached inside the pedestal and flipped open a small cover that revealed a series of blinking status lights. Two were amber, denoting a minor system fault. The engineer used the spanner to adjust a torsion fitting underneath the frame cradle before finally replying, "No, Booter, I was thinking of Sorien...he keeps that scar to remind himself everyday 'bout the war. I don't know Jurell...but then, he's Bajoran and their culture isn't quite like ours...."

Caly crouched down and peered into the pedestal along with him. "Oh... I didn't think about Case..." she admitted, not quite understanding why anyone would need a reminder, but not about to get into that right now. "I know Jurell was in the Resistance," she told him.

A brief chirp indicated the diagnostic test had started, so Riley swiveled his head back to her. "Ah, well maybe Jurell doesn't know how that some of us might be repulsed by that kind of violence." Paddy handed her the spanner back. "Thanks." His eyes looked troubled by her speculation, "Aye...you could be right, Booter...there're some evil people in this universe from what little I've seen of 'em." His latest comments referring to her earlier suggestion that the whole thing had been staged by Tebrianne.

"Yeah... That scares me," she admitted, taking the spanner back and stowing it in his pack with an answering "welcome". She looked thoughtful, her fingers absently drawing in the air. "I think Jurell understands that," she mused, and then out of the blue.... "You ever been in love, Paddy?"

Riley had turned away temporarily from Calyca to check his meter's progress. Upon hearing her question, he jerked his head back suddenly, only to hit it on the overhead bed cradle. "Ouch," he muttered while putting a hand up to rub the throbbing spot. Looking at her sheepishly, the engineer asked as if his ears were playing tricks on him, "Did you just ask if I've ever been in love?"

Caly winced and gave him a commiserating look. "Didn't mean to startle you," she offered apologetically and nodded. "Yeah. Have you?"

"It's okay." He let his hand linger a few moments longer before dropping it to answer her question. The Irishman's eyes twinkled for a moment, "Aye, a long time ago." His face hinted that there was more to the story than that, but Riley didn't elaborate further. Instead, with his right eyebrow raised quizzically, he asked, "Why do you ask, Lass?"

Caly chewed on her bottom lip a bit, a clear indication that she was wrestling with something. She finally didn't answer his question directly. For some reason that she couldn't fathom, she wanted to keep the fact that Jurell had told her he was in love with her to herself. Not because she was worried about it, or didn't like it, or even because she was afraid of it... It was really as simple as feeling rather possessive about it and not wanting to share it with anyone yet. Even though she didn't understand why, or even that she was. So instead she asked, "How do you know when you're in love? Or when someone loves you?"

He started to sit back, but then saw an Enforcer looking their way. Paddy barely leaned against the bed while sticking one hand inside to make a minor interface adjustment. It was clear his mind was chewing over what to say.

She sat on the floor next to him with his tool kit in her lap. Her fingers moved lightly over his tools in an unconscious gesture as she waited for him to respond. She was quiet and thoughtful herself, and not in a hurry. One foot jiggled lightly, a testament to her aggravated hyperactive state.

After several long moments of silence when it looked like he would not answer her question, Riley finally said quietly, "It's not a black and white thing, Booter...not like a schematic, or specification readout." The big man shifted his kneeling position a tad. "What do you feel when you are around him?"

She looked up from contemplating his tools when he started to speak. Large troubled green eyes watched him intently and she frowned at his words. After several moments while she asked herself the same questions, she finally sighed and shrugged a little. "Is it possible to be confused and content at the same time?" she asked and then added a half grumbly: "I like schematics and spec readouts though."

Paddy smiled sagely, buy sadly. "When it comes to love, yes it is." The engineer paused and then said, "There aren't really any rules, Lass...it just happens. And a lot of times to the surprise of both parties." He reached for sonic probe in his kit. Holding it up he pointed, "This is pretty easy to understand right? Simple, easy to use, an ON and OFF switch." Riley stopped to think and postulated, "Compare this to say, a puppy or kitten. They can be pretty darn unpredictable by comparison, no OFF or ON switch whatsoever. And either can be pretty darn complicated when they choose to be."

Caly frowned at his words. If it was possible to be content and confused at the same time... Did that mean she was falling in love with Jurell? Her frown deepened and she made a soft sound of exasperation, shaking her head a bit to clear it and then focusing on the rest of what Paddy was saying. Her lips quirked at the sonic probe and she looked rather confused at the rest of what he was saying. "My puppies and kittens all had ON-OFF switches," she told him, popping her gum lightly and took the probe from him, handing him the calibration tool he'd need to make any more minor adjustments. "You want to help with Shyla's baby?"

He mouthed her words silently in confusion, "My puppies and kittens all had ON-OFF switches?" Paddy looked back at Calyca with a strange look, not sure how to respond to that statement. The fact that she had some 'pet' robotic spiders in her room never even crossed the Irishman's mind. Taking the calibration tool from her dumbly, he managed to say, "Sure...I guess...what's the plan?"

She smiled a bit at his silent mouthing, but it wasn't a gesture that reached her eyes. If Paddy'd asked, she would have explained that all her childhood pets had had ON-OFF switches because they'd all been something robotic built by her father and then herself. "We're gonna build an...incubator that'll be able to mature a fourteen week old fetus," she told him and dropped her voice to whisper, "Uhh... Very classified stuff."

Riley asked tentatively, "A maturation chamber? We have specifications for one?" Paddy's brow wrinkled a little bit as he considered what would be needed to get one functioning with what was currently stored on the ship. It would be a difficult task to scrounge up that many parts without the Enforcers deciding that they were planning something underhanded.

"Shhh.... Not exactly.... Well... sort of..." she whispered and looked to what he was repairing. "How close are you to being done here?"

"Oh, I see." Athough the expression on his face clearly denoted that he did not. The engineer glanced back to the meter. "Another 20 minutes I think. Both of the bed's biosensor controlling circuits seemed to have fractured the lattice integrity of their isolinear controlling chips." He turned his head back to her. "I want to find why those chips were damaged before replacing them."

"What can I do to help? Want me to pull up the treatment log on the bed to see what it's been doing the last twenty-four hours?" She peered inside at the controlling circuits. "Maybe there's some overload happening. Or a loose connection somewhere is causing a power fluctuation. The jolt we took when the blast hit us could have knocked something askew," she suggested. "When you're finished with this come into exam room two," she added softly. "And we'll show you what we're working with."

He tried several times to say something, but every time the Irishman got ready to speak, Caly would add to her list of suppositions. Finally, Paddy just closed his mouth and waited for her to finish. After Booter whispered for him to proceed to Exam Room Two, Riley nodded, "Aye I can do that." The big man motioned to her. "It might be better if I finish this job myself before that thug over there takes an interest in you, Lass." A slight shift of his eyes towards the door indicated they were being watched.

Caly automatically glanced to the door and the Enforcer there. Instant and irrational fear welled up inside her and threatened to send her into a full-blown panic attack. She looked back at Paddy, the terror quite evident in her eyes before she closed them and took a breath to force herself to be calm. Chromium, atomic number 24, symbol Cr... Her hands were shaking. After several moments, she nodded and answered in a faint, tight voice. "Y-You're right... I... I'll be in Exam Room Two..." she told him and opened haunted and disturbed eyes to look at him for several heartbeats before she began to rise.

Paddy reached out and touched her elbow. "Take a deep breath, Booter. Don't let them intimidate you." Moving his head slightly to ensure only Calyca could hear his next words: "We'll be rid of them soon enough...mark my words, Lass."

Caly paused when he touched her elbow and blinked several times as tears welled up in her eyes unbidden. She did as he told her and took a deep breath, blinking back the tears and refusing to let them fall. She gave him a tight, wan smile that didn't reach her eyes. "I know..." she spoke just as quietly as he did. "I won't believe anything else..." she admitted and reached out a hand to lightly, and briefly touch her fingertips to his cheek. "Thanks, Paddy."

The Irishman fought back a slight blush. "Now off you go, Booter, from what you say, there's work to be done." He motioned for her to go, but his face still held a warm smile on it; an attempt to lend support without tipping off the Enforcer standing only a few meters away.

She hesitated for a moment and then nodded. "Aye, Paddy, there is. You know where I'll be," she offered quietly and didn't even spare a glance for the Enforcer as she got up and made her quiet way back to Exam Room Two.

"Aye, Lass, I do..." He watched her leave and then shot a look towards one of their babysitters. The Enforcers appeared to be talking to one another and they didn't take note of Caly's departure...at least it seemed as much for the moment. Paddy sighed to himself and started tracking down exactly what started the problem with this biobed in the first place...Caly was right, there was a lot to do here in Medical.

A lot of work indeed.

---

"Duty Dissonance"
by Lieutenant Xayella Tagliesh - Chief Science Officer
and Ensign Cristobel Sefton - Life Sciences Officer

Location: USS Sulu, Astrometrics
Stardate: 57910.20, 11h00

***

The long, pale-blue medical smock that he wore mostly hid the blood that was still stained into his Class A uniform. Cristobel took slow methodological steps into Astrometrics, where Tagliesh had previously arranged to be working at this time, since Enforcers only roamed through occasionally. They had also previously scheduled a medical check-up for her in Astrometrics. All of this planned before the events of the previous night.

"Lieutenant," Cristobel blandly reached for her attention. Since the lab was empty, save the two of them, he forthrightly told her, "I have a report for you."

Xay waved him over without her usual sarcastic quip or dazzling smile. There was only a seriousness to her character that seemed misplaced, though it hardly was considering the events that had engendered it. Grief and guilt often banished all signs of cheer easily enough. She swivelled a chair in his direction and watched him take it. "How are you doing?" she asked gently.

He already hated that question after not even twenty-four hours of it. Cris simply responded with, "Broken."

Xayella sighed and nodded full understanding. "I know how you feel." Exhaling impatiently, she looked away to mask her disgust. "I want this finished," she whispered, then regarded him with a sharply probing gaze. "Report, Ensign."

Cristobel clearly eyed her with distaste at the request for a verbal recital. He exhaled sharply, as all of the carefully selected diction, from the night before, slipped away from his mind. Cris managed a verbally stumbled, "Three of the, uh, sensor-proofed probes were modified, and all three were destroyed by Windsor personnel. As you know, my team...suffered... casualties..." He trailed off, and just handed her the isolinear chip on which his report was stored.

Xayella regarded it with near trepidation. Their plan had already cost so much, and it had yet to be seen whether there was any worth in it. But for Shyla, they needed to make it work. Sighing, Xayella reached out and closed her fingers around the chip, encompassing Cris' as she did. She watched him as she offered a squeeze, then withdrew her hand, now grasping the chip. As she slipped it into her computer terminal and accessed the information, she asked him, "Are you still up for this?"

"I don't know," Sefton admitted sadly. "I will do my duty, whatever it comes down to. Shyla knew that. ...I should too... I don't know if I can, though. The Enforcers will be suspicious of any activity in the probe hold now; won't they?" --Cris almost sighed-- "Are you certain there are no other avenues towards information about the Gate?"

"There likely is," Xay admitted, "but I'm not sure how willing Captain Bancroft is to hand over that information. All the probes are good for is an assessment of the Gate's external structures and defenses...but even with that knowledge, we'd need to gain control of the ship before we can put it to some use."

For the first time since entering the lab, Cristobel's voice shifted from its flat, dark monotone to the dawn of realisation, as he said, "...And even if we take back the ship, there will still be an armada of alternate universe starships between us and the Gate, who will be suspicious of any sensor sweeps..."

Xayella nodded grimly. "Which means we'd also need a way to stop them...or we could just plough right through." She attempted a smile, but the effort proved half-hearted.

"Sir, to be completely candid, I don't believe I will have time to continue with this project," Cristobel told her contritely, before the probe plan became any firmer. "My duties in Medical are increasing, and the most important of those is ensuring the continued life of Shyla's child."

"How long do you think you can keep that baby in stasis, Ensign?" Xayella asked realistically. "Unless you find a compatible host, it won't survive much longer. It sounds cruel...but is the life of one child worth scrapping a plan that could be beneficial to a crew of a hundred?"

Archly responding to her unbearable condescension, Sefton snapped, "I said that I couldn't work on it, not that you should scrap the plan. I mean, dhia, probes armed with weaponry to 'plough right through' is even more standard than probes armed with thoron-generators. What you need are engineers, not a life-medical-nurse-science officer! Or maybe you should risk your own neck" --Cris tapped the slave collar beneath his shirt collar-- "to get it done. Besides stasis won't matter if--" Cristobel stopped suddenly. Tagliesh didn't need to know about the maturation chamber.

"I have to get back to Sickbay," he declared abruptly. In a moment, Sefton was on his feet and marching for the door.

Xayella studied him with a raised eyebrow, then shrugged and swivelled to face her terminal once more. "Just remember," she called to him, "saving the child won't bring her back. If it comes down to sacrificing it for the sake of something far greater in importance, I trust you will be able to do so."

"I will," Cristobel responded harshly, stopping just micrometers before the range of the door sensors, without turning around. "But right now, this sneaky science probe scheme isn't more important. Every piece of technology has a control panel, if you get close enough. Every piece of technology blows up if you use enough quantum torpedoes. What you need to deal with the Gate is to hide a ship with sensors, weapons and transporters, not a damn probe."

Xayella smiled secretly. "Who says I plan on hiding, Ensign? But...you're no longer a part of this project, so don't fret. Just...go save that baby if you can. I'll focus on the more important task of saving this ship." She turned her back to him, and despite her disparaging remark, she knew if it was a choice between Matt and the ship, she'd focus her efforts on saving him, too. But that baby wasn't Matt, therefore preserving its life was the last concern on her mind.

---

"Fall From Grace, Part 1"

Acting Captain Tebrianne Bancroft
Lt. Commander Benedict T'Kal

Location: Teb's Quarters, USS Sulu
Stardate: 57910.20, 13h30

***

They were alone in her quarters. It was a VIP suite, normally assigned to ambassadors and other dignitaries. The crew from the Windsor had been using them during their stay. Teb slept alone in hers, well except for the ruse she and Benedict were now going to attempt to pull off. He was standing, watching the stars streaking past. Just looking at him, still clothed in his uniform, it took her breath away and sent her heart into a thundering rhythm.

She stepped away from the bed, the leather of her outfit creaking slightly with her movements. "We can try to find another way to convince her," Tebrianne said. "We don't 'ave to do this if you're not comfortable. We'll find another way that's as convincing." They both knew nothing would be as convincing.

He turned from his contemplation of the stars and looked into Teb's eyes. "There's no other way," he said, resigned to the fact that no matter how he looked at the situation it was risky. Tayla had thrown down a gauntlet at both Tebrianne and T'briane. If Lyrr won him, T'briane would simply take Benedict anyway, and he thought that Lyrr's winning role would probably result in T'Briane having her severely disciplined. Probably in the same way as Crix had been. If T'Briane wasn't totally convinced that Tebrianne owned Benedict, then he would be off to the Windsor and to the bed of T'Briane. So he was faced with this; to convince T'Briane that he and Teb were lovers they had to show her an image that looked the part. It wasn't that Benedict had any qualms about nakedness, or even lying to the Alternate Teb, it was that he would be with Tebrianne, in her quarters, in her bed...naked. Alone.

He knew exactly how Lyrr Tayla would react to even the suggestion of it - but she had caused this! Her stupidity in front of the Captain of the Windsor had made this necessary! Not that she would entirely understand it. If they didn't convince the woman Benedict was already gone. He couldn't let that happen. Tebrianne had convinced him that he couldn't let it happen and she wouldn't either.

"It's not as if we haven't done this before," he said with a wry smile.

Tebrianne laughed softly and moved closer to him. "Aye, that we 'ave," she said. "I guess we should get ready to call over to 'er." There was a soft pop, as she eased one of the fastenings of her corset open. She couldn't help being a little nervous. It'd been five years, and they were going to be together, and...and she couldn't deny how she still felt about him. Fully clothed, her body reacted to being near him. She could only imagine what it would be like with them both naked. "I'd offer to 'elp, but that...it might...might be too much."

He chuckled, the nervousness plain as he tried to look anywhere but at what she was doing. "Prophets...." He shook his head. "I think I can manage." He turned red, blushing. "This is not a great idea," he breathed as he unzipped his jacket. His heart rate had already shot up, and he could feel perspiration on his brow as he contemplated what they were about to do. He just wasn't prepared for this, but he couldn't not do it. Another soft 'pop' and another fastening and it was loud and he tried not to look but it was impossible.

His jacket hit the floor as he looked into her eyes again. Drawn there as if by a tractor beam.

The air was cool as the corset came away and dropped to the floor at her feet. Her boots came next. Once she was barefoot, she grinned as she looked up at Benedict. He was so much taller when she didn't have those extra centimetres of height from her footwear. He was still working slowly at his tunic, and it took every bit of willpower within Tebrianne not to watch his every movement. She took a deep breath, hoping that maybe breathing again might slow the pounding in her chest. She popped the first fastening on her pants.

He drew the shirt over his head and off, dropping it on the pile that was growing between them. Her skin was unmarred, alabaster smooth, her figure a little fuller than he remembered, but not by much; only the added maturity of her womanly curves. His memory was so clear, and the sensations of touching that skin seemed to prickle his fingertips as he looked up into her eyes to see a faint smile. Her lustrous hair was glossy, arched eyebrows delicately upturned and the pointed ears peeking from the dark mass as she tilted her head slightly as she drew her pants down over bared thighs.

He'd stopped undressing and breathing at the same time. His torso exposed and the bronzed flesh bared to her gaze, and he had to turn away as he unfastened his own pants. Turning the golden tiger to face her, and him looking suddenly at her refection in the clear night sky in the view port. No matter where he turned, it was like the portrait that had hung on his wall. Her eyes sought his in the reflection. There was no escape from her.

He dropped his pants, leaving his underwear on, and saw in the reflection her small framed body, and he breathed deeply, muscles flexing as he tried to control the shaking that seemed to steal over him. Fear was a cold ball in his gut. He tried to think of Tayla and couldn't. Tebrianne's reflection captivated him.

It'd been over five years since she'd seen the tiger, and since then, it had only ever been in her dreams. But there it was before her, nearly glowing in the lighting of her quarters. Her breathing was short and her heart hammered in her chest to the point where she was certain he would hear it. They were close, only a couple meters separating them, but it still felt like it was light-years. She wanted to touch him, to hold him, and to be held. She wanted to love him again, to become one with him. She slid the pair of scant underwear down her thighs and stepped out of them. She stood before him completely bare, as they'd been so many times. She took a couple steps closer to him.

Benedict closed his eyes as she slipped out of her last garment. His heart was hammering in his chest, an ethereal calmness stealing over him as she stepped closer. Her presence was magnetic and electric at the same time. He'd almost forgotten the aura of her presence, it had faded with time in his memory, but now it was alive and close and overwhelming. He stood trembling with a certain knowledge that she would be feeling the powerful emotions that they had both shared. Their love had been a consuming passion for both of them. They had shared everything: duty, career, life, love, minds, music, friends, experience...time....

The enormity of the loss of her had been so powerful that Benedict had almost taken his own life just to be with her, to follow her into the void. He would have gone gladly if his hand had not been stilled by the vision. He still had something to do...that was all the Prophets had imparted. Had they known then? Known that he would meet her again? Had they arranged for it to happen as Tayla feared? As he feared?

That loss seemed to dissolve as she stood behind him. The silence between them was absolute, yet he could hear her short breaths, the rasp of skin on skin as she stepped up to him. It was like the tattoo on his back was alive, pulsing as he breathed, the gold lustrous and reflecting light at her. The yellow and black eyes of the tiger transfixed her.

Benedict took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, seeking solace in the meditation technique that for him was as easy as breathing, only this time the chaos of his emotions was too strong. He wanted to turn to her, if just to look into her eyes again, but he knew he wanted more than that. He did want more than that. Only he couldn't allow that.

His whole life had been lived to a certain code: Bushido. Honour was a concept embraced by the Klingons and by the ancestors of his father. Martin Tikaru had trained his son from birth in the Martial arts, and in the code by which he lived. It was an uncompromising code. He had given his word. He had made a promise. To break it would make him a lesser man. To break it would make him into a man he despised. Tebrianne had been seduced by a married man before they had met, and Dieran Casey, the XO of the USS Galaxy had been Benedict's nemesis. To break his vow to Tayla would make him just another Dieran Casey. To break his vow to Tayla would break her heart. It would make him another Oresh. That thought was like a cascade of ice water to his spirit. He opened his eyes to see her reflection so close to him, and he felt the longing in her eyes.

Tebrianne put a hand on his shoulder, but didn't dare move any closer. She'd sensed his anguish, the doubt and fear. It was the same as hers, a building anticipation of what might happen. Her eyes were locked on his, gazing at their reflections. She could tell something was different now. He'd calmed, and his anticipation had seemed to diminish. She sighed but wasn't willing to give over to defeat yet. Standing so close to him like this seemed to set fire to her body, and her desire for him seemed to have been inflamed even further.

She tugged gently at the waistband of his underwear. "We should go get into the bed so we can contact her," she said. She blushed at the sound of her own voice, husky with the way he was affecting her.

He nodded, barely perceptibly. Her touch was a stimulus that jolted him. The barest contact and he didn't want to let it end. He was being torn in two and it seemed as if he had no control over it. His resolve was adamant, yet just that touch had inflamed his emotions again. It was like a glimpse into her heart. Her desire was palpable, her voice thrilled him to the core, as he recognized the sultry quality of it. It bombarded him with a million memories and he distinctly remembered that same tone as she'd breathed into his ear that he was the one, that she loved him...and he'd told her that she was his only love. He'd told Tebrianne that he'd love her until the day he died. It was true. He would. Always and forever.

He turned his head and looked at the bed, its covers turned down invitingly. A tear fell from his eye. Always and forever he'd said. She'd been his Betrothed. They were going to be married. They hadn't had the time and it had been taken away from both of them. Her loss had been a raw and jagged wound for so long and the barely healed flesh of it was tearing again as he turned to face her. He only looked at her eyes. His desire for her was pounding in his blood and the voice of Farrell muttering behind his back came to him then: keep yours zipped he'd said, obviously not meaning for Benedict to have heard, but he had, and he'd ignored the man's insolence and insulting manner for the sake of the mission. Did any of it matter?

He had no control. No center. He knew that he was at Tebrianne's mercy. If she pushed, he'd fall. It was so clearly written in his eyes as he looked at her.

Tebrianne took his hands into her own and led him toward the bed. She kept her gaze on his eyes, on the beautiful violet there. She could see the conflict in him, but the way he burned for her...it was too much. She knew the truth of the situation in some rational part of her brain, but all she could feel was her yearning for him, and his burning desire for her.

Her love was on fire, and she wanted to make music with him again, to be close and his dearest friend. When they reached the bed, she gently eased his underwear down over his hips. As he was exposed to her, a familiar pulse of desire swept through her. She could barely find her breath. She shifted her gaze with effort, back to his eyes. He was so beautiful.

All the memories, all of their time together came flooding back, and it could very nearly have smothered her, but not with him there. She reached up and brushed her fingertips over the edge of his tattoo, as she'd done so many times. Hers weren't nearly as elaborate, but it was another bond between them. So many bonds, so much depth. Her body was flushed and nearly pulsing with her need. The touch of her flesh to his was like flames of pure bliss.

It was the way she traced the lines of the tiger's paw that stirred him. So familiar, her light tracing fingertips brushing his skin, taming the tiger, she'd once said. His eyes found hers and once again he fell into the darkness of her chocolate colored eyes. There were no motes of gold there. He was looking for the motes of gold...dark eyes and tiny fragments of gold. Tayla's eyes. His head was spinning as if he was intoxicated. He wanted her so much.

He stepped back and sat heavily on the bed, sliding under the covers. The movement away from her was defensive, and the moment her fingers left his shoulder he missed them. For a moment he looked at her, naked and flushed, sultry and erotic. Her every movement sinuous and for a moment he was reminded of Shirik Lektar in that same quality of grace. Only this was Tebrianne - the original and no substitute. His breath stopped as it caught in his throat as he surveyed her beautiful body. He'd dreamed this moment a thousand times, remembered it more, anguished that he'd never see her again and yet here she was. Stepping out of his dreams and into his life once again.

He hadn't said a word since undressing. He didn't trust his voice. He didn't trust any part of him, and he hadn't been able to hide the effect she had on him. He lay down fully, and looked up at her as she stood beside the bed.

Tebrianne slipped onto the bed with him, her body stretched out against his. She couldn't help reaching out to touch him, sliding her hand along his arm and feeling the muscles there. Her eyes couldn't leave his, wouldn't leave his. She brushed her lips against his shoulder as they lay there together. She couldn't help noticing just how much of an effect she had on him, and the relief was overwhelming. Her fear had been that he wouldn't have any reaction, but...he'd definitely reacted, just as she remembered. Her breathing seemed to be coming in shuddering gasps as she gazed deeply into his eyes. Her hand slipped up to his chest, revelling in the touch of his skin.

His fingers brushed her hip and he was aware of the softness of her body that lay beside him, then was touching him, the swell of her breasts pressing against his chest, her thigh sliding over his and between his legs as his automatically moved over hers. He traced the curve of her back, her side, her shoulder and they were pressed together, the strength of his reaction to her was frightening in its intensity. Her lips brushed him and he let out a soft sigh and closed his eyes, surrounded by her womanly scent and her own heightened state of arousal. He ached. It would be so easy to give in to it. He was like a surfer suspended upon the crest of a massive wave, waiting for the crash, knowing that it would come and not being able to steer away from it. His arms snaked around her and he held her to him, locked together, twined together as lovers. He held her tighter as the rush of emotion overwhelmed him and he drew in a shuddering breath as he buried his face in her hair.

Her lips found his chin and jaw, trailing kisses there as she held herself to him. The heat of their bodies was intense, an all-consuming fire that would claim them both. Her hand found his hip, nails gently scratching against the flesh. It wouldn't be enough to break the skin, but it would feel nice. It'd been so long since they'd been twined together like this, and it was almost too much for her. But the feeling of his body against hers, it was perfect and blissful. How she'd missed the feel of Ben. Her lips found his throat. The heat of him against her was intense. She needed him.

He moaned softly as she scratched him, and as her lips found his throat he drew a sharp breath and rolled back away from her, but they were entwined and so she flowed with him, her hair falling around his face as she lay almost atop of him. His hands ran up her back, through her hair and scrunched it in his fists, drawing her almost roughly upward so that their lips met in a mutual exhale and a kiss that was intimate and immediately passionate. He held her strongly by the hair and one hand stole downward to caress her flanks along her back. He held her immobile, the kiss stretching, burning and arousing. They breathed in pants and sighs between dancing tongues and biting lips. It had been an eternity and Benedict lost himself in the kissing, pressing her body against his hard frame, driving her as he'd done so many times into a heightened state of arousal and desire.

Tebrianne heard herself moaning as she kissed him, her soul aflame. She circled one arm around him, and the other reached back to him. The touch, the feeling, the heat, it was all exactly as she remembered it. It was almost as if time had not passed for them, and they were back in his quarters on the Galaxy. Their lovemaking had always been rough and frenetic. The passion they shared was intense; she loved the way they moved together.

The heat built until it was too much to bear. The covers were roughly kicked away, and he rolled her onto her back, hands tangled once again in her hair as he kissed her throat, laying his weight upon her and trapping her leg between his. He felt her other leg part and raise, and wrap behind him, pulling his lower body against her. His lips found her breast and she shuddered beneath him as he held her and tasted her flesh. He knew exactly what she needed; what drove her wild, what brought out the wanton side of her, and he played her like his favourite instrument.

Tebrianne cried out at his beautiful touch. With one hand, she kept contact with his body, touching caressing. She needed the reality, the touch. As if the length of his body, the heat of his being, weren't enough. The other hand, clenched the sheets as she squirmed against him. She wanted to laugh and sing, cry out his name and pull him into her. She wanted to become one with him, to meld together as they belonged. She was his.

He raised himself up above her, kissing her lips, feeling her intense joy and knowing that it was time. Ben broke the kiss, and in a throaty, lust filled voice he said, "Make the call..." His intense violet gaze held hers. "Please, Teb...do it now. She'll believe you now." One look in her glazed eyes, at her tousled hair, the flush of her throat and the sound of her voice would convince T'Briane. He barely could control the urge to keep going, to make love to her, and be joined, become one and in becoming one lay his greatest fear.

It took a moment for Tebrianne to comprehend what Ben had said. Her body felt like it was on fire, ready to be consumed by the heat of their passion. Her eyes were locked on his, her expression pleading. "Oh god, Ben," she whispered, nearly delirious with desire, "please...don't just..." Her hands reached out to him, leaving a trail of fire across his chest. "Please... Don't tease me. Don't tease."

He closed his eyes and clenched his jaw, the pleading in her voice, the way she moved beneath him, her touch, all combined to make his body demand that he do as she wanted. The desire was a rage inside of him, and yet he couldn't. He wanted to. Prophets he wanted it more than anything right now, but he couldn't. When he opened his eyes it was to see her pleading expression, and it nearly broke him. "Please, Teb...it's not supposed to be like this. I want to, Prophets...I want to.... " He lay against her and wrapped his arms around her, his face pressed against her breast. "You know what will happen if we do this. You know why...we can't. If you love me...you won't ask this of me. I know you want me. I want you too. More than you could imagine. I love you. But I love her too.... If I do this, it will change the both of us. It'll make it less than what we had. It will kill me. Make the call. Please...."

"Less than what we had is light-years better than what I have now," Teb murmured. "Oh Ben... This is killing me. I've lost. It's her, and there's no room for me. I can't do this, Ben. Not like this. I can't do this with you working me up, taking me to warp, and then bailing out. It's not fair. It's cruel. It's easy for you. You can just go to Lyrr and she can help you take the ache away. What about me, Ben? What the bloody hell am I supposed to do after this? I've got no one. Your crew doesn't trust me. The Windsor's just a pile of sadistic bastards." She writhed beneath him. Her eyes were rimmed with tears, but she wouldn't cry. "What the bloody hell am I supposed to do? Oh god, Ben..."

Her plea cut through him like a knife, and he responded to it by holding her tightly, eyes clenched shut. It was the stark truth. Tebrianne was alone if she didn't have him. The crew didn't trust her, and for all he knew they never would; she had compromised too much already and they'd see her as another Andrea Collins - always with suspicion, wondering when she'd bail on them to look after her own interests. That was what she was doing now to Benedict. She cared for what she'd lost, not for what he'd had to put up with, or what he'd lost or the dreadful heartache that this situation was putting him through. She cared for Tebrianne and what she wanted. Only Benedict also cared for Tebrianne and a large part of him wanted her, demanded to be with her...only if he gave in to it, he'd also lose the respect of the crew. He'd lose everything. He'd lose Tayla, and maybe this might destroy her too. It would destroy him....

He spoke with a dead voice, the emotional overload just too much to bear. "You'll be okay," he said through the tears that pooled on her chest. "What about me? What about what I want? What about the woman that I love? The woman that I've asked to marry me? If I do this with you, Tebrianne, it will destroy everything I have and everything I am. You'll survive...I can't say the same for me. I can't deal with this. I can't be in love with both of you, and yet I am. You asked for this. You pushed and you knew after everything I've said to you that this is wrong, but you still pushed. I'm not capable of denying you. I can't stop loving you, but if you make me do this it means that you don't respect who I am, or what I stand for. Prophets have mercy on me, but I love you and I'm afraid of you...of joining with you, of melding...and living through everything all over again. I can't do that, Tebrianne. I can't face it. I've had so much pain already and you just want to inflict more. Do you think you'll earn anyone's trust if you do this and destroy the woman I love because you are lonely? You're a beautiful woman, you'll find someone else. I won't. My life belongs with Tayla. That's my choice to make. If you don't respect that...then you aren't the woman I always loved. I'm not doing this. I can't."

Everything he said made her head spin, but one thing caught, one thing held her. "Afraid of me? Bloody hell, Ben, I can't meld with you again. That part of me is gone. I burnt it out when I saved Roallo. I burnt it out when I saved myself." She turned away from him then. "Bloody should have just given up then. I should have just died. It would have hurt far less than this. Far worse than having you take me to the brink and dump me. They don't want me here, Ben. I can see it in their eyes. And, I can't go back. Go back to Lyrr, Ben. That's where you want to be. I'll figure a way for myself out of this. Just go back so I can stop 'urting you. We can't keep up the ruse, so we'll 'ave to figure another way. But...just go back to 'er." In a soft voice, she sang, "I love him / But every day I'm learning / All my life / I've only been pretending / Without me / His world would go on turning / A world that's full of happiness / That I have never known."

Her voice and the sadness in it hurt him. He still held her. She turned away, and he was behind, still aching with the desire for her, but feeling an infinite sadness at her distress. She couldn't meld? It was unexpected. It was a key that unlocked his greatest fear of her, but was it truth? He was good at discerning lies, her voice had the ring of truth about it. If she couldn't meld, he couldn't fear...yet there was still Tayla. He was confused, and the soft singing stilled him, and drew his attention to what she was saying. If she couldn't go through with the ruse, then all this was for nothing. He'd be taken by T'Briane. He felt a chill at that, yet her warmth against him was undeniable. He held her, not knowing what to do - where to turn. Their whole existence depended on Tebrianne being able to get them home.

He touched her shoulder, softly, and kissed the warm skin there, not understanding anything anymore, only that she was in pain and he loved her. For her to think that death was preferrable to this...he couldn't bear her pain and his own.

His touch seemed to dissipate the anger she felt and she leaned back against him. She felt the tears slipping from her eyes and chastised herself for them. One arm groped back and found his hip and thigh. She wanted to hold him forever and never let go. It had all been torn away from her before, and she'd never been given a chance to fight back. And, here he was again. How could she not fight? Why did it all have to be so complicated? She tilted her head toward his and gently kissed him, catching the side of his head as his lips nuzzled her shoulder.

"We need time," he whispered brokenly. "I need time...." It was an admission that he couldn't let her go either. She just couldn't expect to walk back into his life after five years of mourning her death to think that nothing had changed. "Please, Teb...." He curled into her, the desire waning, but still, he needed to hold her again and he sought her hand, twining fingers with hers as he held her to him. "I don't know what to do...I just need time."

She turned back to him, her eyes finding his. She brushed her lips against his chin, against his lips. Their bodies were twined together, as they had so many times before. It felt so familiar, so comfortable. Things were different, but there was a sameness there that couldn't be denied. "Yes," she whispered. "Just...just don't lead me on, Ben. Don't take me to the brink and let me go." She kissed him again, as the pounding of her heart slowed. "I'm afraid, Ben...but, yes. I love you, Ben. I love you so much it hurts. I can't lose you...you're all I have. I love you."

He closed his eyes against the words, but they struck him anyway. He couldn't deny her the right to fight for what she wanted. He was in an agony of uncertainty, one minute resolved and the next confused, lost, at the mercy of her eyes and her lips. She kissed him and nothing else mattered...and yet everything else mattered.

Benedict held her gently now, his hand stroking her back without conscious thought, their bodies twined again. The whole point of this was to make a call...yet she wouldn't do it. If they couldn't find a way. "What about T'Briane?" he asked softly.

"I don't think I should try to talk to her while I look like I've been crying," she said. "Or if I look like I'm about to explode from pent up desire. You are supposed to be taking care of that in here, you know." With a mischievous smile, she slipped her hand down between her legs and let out a soft gasp. "Oh crikey..."

"Prophets..." he sighed and felt the ripple of instant desire that tore through him. "Teb...please." He was holding her, completely taking him by surprise. He could feel her responses as she took in a shuddering breath and his head swam as he stared into her eyes. His own body was responding despite his wishes. He groaned and closed his eyes, his hand gliding over her thigh. "No...Teb. Come on...." He kissed her, he couldn't help it..

She responded instantly to his kiss, one arm flung around him to hold herself tight against his body. She hadn't intended the pulsing flare of his desire, only to slake her own. She needed T'Briane to see her satisfaction, and this was the only option. His kiss, his hand...she couldn't stop. She wanted to say something, but couldn't as his kiss consumed her.

He broke the kiss as he pulled her hand away from her. There was a momentary flare of frustration, almost verging on anger but his lips caught her breast and he moved down her body. It was just too much to handle. He couldn't stop it. The rational part of his mind was subsumed by desire. His lips brushed her navel, biting her skin, moving lower and she gasped as she understood what he intended..

Her hands brushed through his hair, touching and caressing. The anticipation of his touch, the actual touch, it was all bliss. His lips against her skin were intense, driving her wild. She'd always been sensitive to touch, especially his. Her fingers curled into his hair as he slid ever lower, and she let out a gasping cry. It was better than she remembered.

---

"Fall From Grace, Part 2"
By: Acting Captain Tebrianne Bancroft
Lt. Commander Benedict T'Kal
Captain T'Briane

Location: Teb's Quarters, USS Sulu
Stardate: 57910.20, 13h55

****

Benedict lay on his back, one arm slung across his eyes, breathing heavily and filled with guilt. Her body was curled against him, one arm slung across his chest, her fingers once more tracing the lines of the tiger. He felt guilty, heavy and dreadful. He felt shame and confusion. His emotions were in turmoil, he'd satisfied her needs, but at what cost? He hadn't...loved her but where was the line? He knew that it had been crossed the first moment she'd touched him.

Tebrianne leaned up and kissed his forehead then his lips. She looked sated, unlike earlier when her entire body seemed to quiver with her desire. Her movements were languid and relaxed. She kissed him again. "Time to contact 'er," she said. She sat up and activated the comm, holding the sheet to cover herself from anyone else who might see, even though visual was currently off. "Ops, get me Captain T'Briane on the Windsor."

"Aye, Captain," came the reply.

Tebrianne snapped on the visual and let the sheet fall. The screen was dark, but then quickly replaced with T'Briane's face. She smiled her cruel smile.

"Tebrianne, I see you've been busy."

Teb glanced back at Ben, then at T'Briane. "You could say that," she said, and brushed her fingers over Ben's thigh, then slipped her hand into his. "Everything is good here. We're on schedule for joining the fleet. The crew will be ready when we get through, but I'm not certain yet 'ow they'll perform. Against the Dominion, they may fight without encouragement. Against the Federation, that may be different."

"We may need to replace the crew for that stage."

Tebrianne nodded. "I'll keep you informed."

"Anything further?"

It only took a little more time to give the rest of her report, through most of which T'Briane's eyes were focused on Ben.

He was aware of her scrutiny, and sat up behind Tebrianne as she was speaking, one arm draped slowly across her shoulder, his hand caressing her skin as he kissed the nape of her neck. He smiled at the view screen, and stared into T'Briane's eyes as he kissed Teb's earlobe, making her quiver as she tried to talk business.

"Very good," T'Briane finally said. "I look forward to your next report. Make me proud." With that, the screen went dark.

Tebrianne collapsed back against Ben, her head falling on his shoulder. After several moments, she turned back to face him, her hand sliding over his chest. "I think we did it," she said softly. "We can go now, if you'd like, Ben."

He nodded, relief warring with guilt as he fell back against the pillows. He rubbed his face, knowing there was nothing else he could have done. He had to get the ship home. It was the only way he could rationalize it. Only he knew in reality it was only so that he could go home. "What do we do now, Teb?" he asked in a lost voice.

She held herself to him, gazing into his eyes. She could feel his sadness, his guilt. She felt it too, her own as well as his. She brushed her lips against his chest, a touch as light as feathers. "I don't know," she whispered. There was no doubt everything had become monumentally more complicated.

"I don't know if we can just concentrate on getting 'ome, and...and then figure it all out." The love that shone in her eyes was undiminished, but her guilt and sorrow was there too. She knew she'd hurt him; they'd hurt each other. And, somewhere along the way it would hurt Lyrr. Why did it all have to be so complicated? And, why did she have to love him so damn much?

"At least we fooled her, and it'll keep her at bay for a spot longer." She was silent for a little longer as they just watched each other, sharing in each other's feelings through their bond. "We can stay in 'ere for a little longer, then get dressed and go back. We can just 'old each other for a little longer."

His arms went around her as she rested her head on his chest. Her hair brushed his sensitive skin, and her body moulded to his. He wanted to keep holding her, but his thoughts went to Tayla and he was torn. The situation was out of control. If he told Tayla then she would fall to pieces when they needed her the most. He couldn't allow that. She was already on the edge and she needed to focus or it would be totally lost - their one and only chance to get home. He'd not made love to Tebrianne, but in his mind he had. He'd still pleasured her. There was no difference. Not really. He still wanted to and he cursed his own feeling of frustration. He knew he'd lost. He just had to hold it together until they got home. Once that was accomplished...he'd deal with this.

He'd deal with the shame. The loss of face. Once they were home.

The bond they shared was stronger than ever, and through it, Tebrianne sensed Ben's remorse, his guilt, his shame. She didn't know what she could say to him. She knew no words that could mend the situation and make everything right. She knew what they felt for each other, and she knew he felt the same for another. And, he'd chosen the other. She also knew that he couldn't give up on her, the love they shared, the love that had never diminished. The joy she should have felt, however, wasn't joyful. "We'll figure a way through this," she whispered. "I don't know 'ow, but...we will. Ben, if you don't want me to, I won't. And... it may be wrong to ask, but... but I want to do something for you."

"You've done enough for me," he whispered brokenly.

Tebrianne sat up and gaped at him. "Done enough--!? I didn't ask you to go down on me, Benedict T'Kal. I would have taken care of it on my own. I would have done it myself. I thought that despite everything else, you did it because you loved me. I thought you enjoyed it. You make it sound like some obligation you were forced to perform. I spent five bloody years without you, Ben. I don't have the willpower to not touch you, not love you. And, if you start touching me back, I melt into nothing. Don't blame this on me, Ben, because what we did, we did together. I know you're ashamed, and I know you feel guilty. A part of me feels so bloody rotten, I don't even want to look at my reflection in a mirror. But this is the situation we're in, but I'm not about to curl up and wallow in my shame and regret. Making mistakes is part of life and everyone makes them. Maybe we made a mistake, Ben; but we made an even bigger one five years ago. We 'ad our lives torn apart, ripped to shreds, and I lost you...we lost each other. What...what 'appened today just shows what we still feel. It's complex and difficult, and won't be solved easily...but we still love each other passionately. I know I can't turn that part of myself off and I can't ignore it. I love you, Ben, and you love me. And...I hope you don't resent me. I hope you're not ashamed of your love for me. And, I hope you don't really blame this on me. I love you, Ben. I'm not ashamed of that. I'm not ashamed that you can turn me on with a look. Or turn me into jelly with a touch. And...and it's almost insulting that you feel shame and guilt at giving into your feelings and desire for me."

He listened almost impassively through it all, not contradicting her at all. He simply looked at her. "I did what I did because I love you...and because when it comes to you...I'm weak. You know how much I love you - I've always loved you from the first moment I set eyes on you. I still remember the expression on your face when we rode a bloody lift together seven years ago! Do you think for a second that I've forgotten anything about you? I've thought about you every single day without exception. I've compared every woman I've seen since your death to you...and no one has ever come close. Not even Tayla!" He rolled off the bed, hands reaching through his hair as he struggled for breath. "Dammit, Tebrianne you're in my mind all the time. Always! We have this bloody bond that didn't even go away after you died! Now I know why! At least you lived with some bloody hope for five years! I lived with the fact that you'd died! Five long damned years and you were dead- not coming back, no hope of seeing you, talking to you...touching you...."

His tears were streaming down his face as he stared out of the view port. "Not being able to love you...but loving you anyway...knowing you were dead...and still I used to sit up at night and sing to you...just you and me...until I couldn't bear to sing anymore and I didn't play my guitar for so long. When you died you took everything with you!" He stumbled to the view port and gripped it with both hands staring at his shattered reflection. "You took everything with you, Teb, yet here you are...and you say you've suffered! I loved you so much I wanted to die! There's been so many times where I risked my life carelessly because I wanted to die...each time I lived through it and cursed that I had!

"Three months ago I was almost killed because I chose to fight an assassin with a blade instead of a phaser...and she beat me - almost. I would have died - should have died if she'd been focused enough to finish me when she could. I killed her, Teb. Lyrr saved my life and brought me back and it was the closest thing to death I'd suffered." He turned to look at her once more. "How can you love someone so much that all you want to do is die when they aren't there when you wake in the morning? That's how I felt without you! For five years!"

She moved up behind him and put her arms around him, holding herself to him. "I'm so sorry, Ben," she whispered. "I think...I think it was bad on both of us. I would 'ave given anything to get a message to you, to let you know. I wanted to tell you I was trying to come back to you. I didn't know if I'd ever make it. I wrote...a lot. I've got a padd with five years of letters for you. I've got about...four hours of songs... I felt like I was dead without you. It was...it was like a part of me was gone. All the notes sounded flat...except for the songs I wrote for you; they sound alright." She kissed his shoulder. "I remember that turbolift. I don't think I realized it at the time, but I definitely fell in love then. And, the first time you sang to me, I fell in love all over again. We had so much. I hope we still do. That's why I wanted... I love you so much, Ben. And, I wanted to give you something, something that I could give you from me. I loved doing that...with you. I think I just loved hearing those noises you make. Okay, and the pleasure it gave you too. I don't want you to resent me because of this, Ben. We still love each other so much We're very passionate people and our feelings for each other go all the way to our core. You can't just turn that off."

"Do you think I can?" he asked. "Even my own body betrays me with you! One look is all it takes, one smile...and I can't close it out. I can't turn away from you and I can't...." He was trembling. "I love Tayla, Teb...but it's different than what we had. It's not any better but it's not any worse either. She needs me...as much as you do. I need her...as much as I need you. I can't live in the middle. If I choose you I destroy her. If I choose her...I turn my back on you. What happens if I can't do either?"

"I love you, Ben," Tebrianne said. "I know you love me, and I know you love her. I can...I can feel it. I know I can't have you to myself. It isn't fair for me to ask you to love only me, or be with only me. You love both of us, and to force you to choose...it's five years ago all over again. Choosing one of us is only going to tear you in two...it already is. I won't ask you to choose. It's not fair...none of this is fair. I don't know if it would ever work...but I know I can't ask you to make that choice. I love you too much to try to force you to split or sunder your heart, Ben."

"So what is it you're asking? To share?" He put his head back and closed his eyes. "Prophets if it was you and Jules I'd probably do it." He shook his head. "Jules is light years away...and Tayla wouldn't share." He looked at Tebrianne. "I wouldn't share her either. Let's just put this aside and deal with it after we get home. I can't deal with it now. If I tell Tayla what happened she's either going to take you on or fall apart - or both. I need her. I can't let that happen, she's the one the crew will follow and we need her."

"I think putting it aside is best," Teb said as she nuzzled her cheek against his. "At least until we're past this crisis. But, just to clarify, I don't want 'er; I want you. It wouldn't work anyway. Like you said, she won't share you." She let the moment hang as they stood together. After several long minutes, she kissed his shoulder again. "Now, you did for me...will you let me do for you?"

"Not now," he said shaking his head. "The mood is gone." He walked over to his uniform.

She gave him a sad smile and started toward her own clothing. She brushed the tips of her fingers over his back as she passed, then stooped to gather her clothes. She began pulling them on as she watched him. She only hoped the pain she'd caused him would dissipate. At least she could still feel his love for her, burning as hot as ever. He was conflicted, and that was where the sadness began. He felt he'd dishonoured himself. There were things, though, that went beyond honour and codes. Their love for each other, their desire for each other...they couldn't be contained so easily. She didn't know if she could ever make him see. She wasn't sure if it truly was destiny that brought them back together, that brought him to her...but if that were the case, they were helpless to resist. Even if it wasn't destiny, they were helpless in the face of their love for each other. It was too strong, too overpowering.

Tebrianne finished pulling on the last of her clothing, and then moved over to where he was still pulling his on. "If you're up for it, I was going to bring my guitar to the lounge tonight."

"I'll be busy," he said tiredly. "I have people to see, and I have to make sure everything is on track for what we need to do. I'm Chief of Security, Teb, I can't just drop it and jam in the lounge...not in the situation we're in. The crew would see that as deserting them...and singing with the enemy." He finished zipping his jacket. There was something feral to his stance. Pent up and caged. "I need to get out of here." He turned away and made for the door. "I'll see you." The door opened and swished closed on his back as he was pulling his hair back into a ponytail.

"See you," she said softly with a sigh. "So much for keeping up appearances." She just hoped he wouldn't resent her, hate her. He blamed her, she knew that. She scrubbed away the tears. "'ow the bloody hell do you expect me to resist you? You know I'm weaker than you. You know I've never been able to resist you." She kicked at the edge of the bed and turned away. With a ragged sigh, she left her quarters and headed toward the bridge. Better to get lost in work than to wonder if Ben would ever speak to her again.

---

"Life Happens"

Lt. Commander Damhnait Sefton - Chief Medical Officer
Lt. (jg) Natalia Druschev - Astrometrics
Ensign Cristobel Sefton - Life Sciences Officer
CPO Calyca Boothroyd - Engineering Crewchief
CPO Patrick Riley - Engineering Transporter Crewchief
Crewman Sorg Jurell - Security Officer

Location: USS Sulu, Sickbay
Stardate: 57910.20, 14h03

***

Hiding behind the locked doors of private examination room two was an effort to keep their activities confidential from fellow officers, rather than Enforcers, for once. They couldn't have kept the Enforcers out, even if they tried to.

Sorg Jurell sat at a workstation that was configured for the medical sensors of the room and was busy tapping information into a text file that would eventually find its way to the TAC Team. He was compiling a list of replication menu items that had been passed to him innocuously as he'd passed an operations officer in the corridor. The switch had been done rather well, and Jurell even prided himself that Calyca hadn't even noticed the pass. The compilation was the food items requested by the Enforcers. All information was being pulled together, regardless of its nature. As such he kept a watch on the door, but left Caly and Cris to do their thing. He idly wondered where they had managed to get all the parts they had collected..

Leaning against the door, from the inside, Cristobel Sefton made another minor adjustment to the schematics for the maturation chamber. The changes showed up on Boothroyd's PADD for her approval and she looked them over, incorporating them into the thing already being built in her head. She gave her approval and after a moment of thought, added a slight tweak to a parallel circuit and sent it back to the medical officer.

Multitasking objectives in his head, Cristobel prepared to send a telepathic request to Doctor Sefton and immediately asked, "Do you think we'll need any more materials?"

"I think we're good to get started putting this thing together." Caly looked from where all the parts and supplies were laid out over to Cris. "We'll probably need more as we go along, but let's get this going. The clock is ticking and we've got," she glanced up at the chronometer, "thirty-six hours left? Did you get the bio-neural gel pack?"

"I did," Cris affirmed, yanking the medical kit from his shoulder. They couldn't afford to arouse suspicion among the Enforcers or their fellow crewmates by having Doctor Sefton order all of the materials through official channels. And sneakiness was clearly already the order of the day. Cristobel opened it up and presented the case, in which a gel pack had been tucked.

Caly took it and peeked inside, smiling a little and reaching in to touch it. She loved these things and even hugged the case for a moment. "I love these things," she murmured, and after a moment set it somewhere out of the way and safe. "Perfect." She patted it and turned back to Cris.

Jurell heard her, it was hard to not hear her. He was tuned in to the sound of her voice and talking about the gel packs made him smile. Maybe he'd get her one for her very own. He grinned and kept on entering data.

Cristobel wanted to smile, but ended up grimacing, which only got worse when he recognized that he was grimacing, when he meant to be smiling. He quickly hid his face behind his PADD and remotely checked up on his project in the life sciences laboratory. With a few more taps of the controls, he lowered the heat output on the proto-laporalyn, and watched the sensor readouts to ensure it reacted accordingly.

"So.... Before we get started... And while we're alone," the smile she gave him was a wee bit tight and didn't reach her eyes. "What's the word on the probes? We still going ahead with it?"

"I..." --Cristobel had to think on it for several beats, before settling on-- "...lost the word. I informed Lieutenant Tagliesh about my other projects, water and air, but neither of us were keen on her having only a small portion of my time. She wouldn't tell me what the plan is now, but it sounds like she's lost interest in subterfuge."

Caly nodded and rubbed her brow. "I feel horrible about not--" She started to say how horrible she felt that they didn't get finished because that just made it seem like Shyla's death was for absolutely nothing. But she stopped her words, not wanting to say anything that she knew would upset him. "I suppose that figures..." she finally wound up saying and gave him a wan smile.

After the doors swooshed open for him, Riley came back into Main Sickbay with the parts Calyca had asked him to round up. It had been far easier for him to move around and rifle through the Sulu's spare parts stores without strict Enforcer supervision than Boothroyd after the probe incident. And since he liked her, and since there was no emergency that required his services, it was a request he did not mind one iota.

There was a tiny life to save after all.

Alerted to Riley's arrival, Cris and Caly came out from the exam room, but they brought the somberness of their conversation with them. Cristobel forced his expression impassive, since Caly's attempt to preserve his feelings, with the use of careful words, was utterly lost on the telepathic Ensign. Quietly, he remarked, "Last night changed the entire situation, and new situations need new behaviours, no matter how much we might want to make the old behaviour worth something."

The Chief sighed and nodded, her gaze more fully taking in Cris. "You're right," she agreed. "And right now... Doing this is... It's as important as everything else. Because it's something for everyone to focus their hope on. It's symbolic."

The Irishman walked up into their conversation carrying a box and immediately realized he'd interrupted a difficult moment. "I can come back in a few minutes if you like," he offered both Caly and Cris.

"Nonsense." The petite engineer moved over to peer into his box of goodies. "You get it all?" she asked, looking up and smiling a little at him. It was an automatic gesture, and like the one she'd given Cris, wasn't reflected in her eyes. "We were just talking about how important what we're trying to do is."

He nodded 'yes' to both the question and her statement concerning symbolism.

"Aye, I got everything you requested." Paddy gave both of them a small grin. "Yes, it is and in more ways than either of you can know."

"How many more ways?" Cristobel queried in puzzlement.

"Oh?" Caly looked up from pulling things out of the box and echoed Cris' question in that single uttered word.

Paddy looked at Cris and then back to Caly. "You haven't heard?" He nonchalantly moved further away from the Enforcer's hearing and set the box down on a nearby biobed. The older chief turned back towards his two confidantes. "I think the whole ship knows about what happened." He produced a PADD and showed it to them. "Ensign Hansen handed this to me just before I left Main Engineering."

Caly took the PADD he offered with more than a bit of curiosity and stood where Cris could see it too. Her eyes widened at the list of over one hundred names of people who'd volunteered to help with Shyla's baby in any way they could. She let out a low whistle. This was more than even she'd thought. "Wow..." she uttered simply.

"That's great," Cristobel intended to enthuse, but it ended up coming out as a matter-of-fact statement. He wanted to be ecstatic; he knew he should be gladdened by this show of support, but what he felt was bitterness. In one regard, he felt a sense of comfort and security in the certainty that Shyla's child would survive, but, mostly, it upset him to have recognized so many of the names on the PADD. So many of those names had come to Shyla's side after Ethan's death; so many of those names had made big promises to stay by her side; so many of those names had never so much as shared a meal with Shyla since the memorial.

Sefton gestured to the private exam room, and led the way back in. He felt embarrassed to be feeling the way he did, and he covered it with an uneasy, "None of these people know the details of our confidential plans, right?"

Caly followed and shook her head. "No, we are the only ones who know," she assured him, and included Paddy and even Jurell in her 'we'. "And anyone you've told." She smiled a little tightly but there was no humor in the depths of her eyes. There was still just a haunting pain. "You realize Crix made a martyr out of her..." she continued softly, her voice as tight as her smile. "Whether they knew her or not, people will rally around her, and more importantly, the baby now. Around the symbology of what they represent." She wasn't looking at either of them now. Her eyes were focused on the counter before her and her hands were automatically starting to sift through parts and fit pieces together.

Taking up the PADD to regard the names again, Cristobel offered, "I'll start sussing out if anyone else has expertise that we need, and get Doctor Sefton to order them onto our project. We'll fight back against the Enforcers through continued living, rather than barbaric brutality."

***

Some days, Damhnait Sefton wished emergency alerts didn't appear on the LCARS in blood red. It made minor emergencies seem inherently more dangerous, and it provided a chilling foreshadowing of how dire emergencies would likely end. After Sefton summoned Lieutenant Druschev, Damhnait made sure to deactivate the alert on the console behind her head, and simply monitored the situation on her private desk terminal.

Natalia walked into Sickbay feeling raw. She'd discovered in the Mess Hall that Shyla had been killed the night before, and the news had shocked her so badly that she had been unable to attend to duty that day. She'd spent the entire morning in tears, and had been looking after Domenic, who was still ill. As such she was still wracked with grief. Her eyes were red and swollen; Shyla had been perhaps her only friend. She'd had dinners with her and Domenic. She'd looked after Domenic a few times, and even during the emergency while Natalia was away on a mission. Shyla had been a kind and gentle girl, and she didn't deserve what that animal had done to her. Natalia couldn't face anyone, but Doctor Sefton had called her in. She'd said it was important. So she was here.

She turned up at Damhnait's door in her uniform, hair loose, but looking a mess. She looked in and gave the doctor a curt nod. "You wanted to see me, Commander?"

Suddenly standing behind her desk, Damhnait gently offered, "Please, have a seat."

There was a strange look in the doctor's eyes; compassion and anxiety. Natalia nodded and did as she was asked, seating herself and crossing her legs at the knee and curling up, elbows resting on her thigh. Her throat was sore from crying, and she wore no make-up. She looked at Damhnait expectantly, but a little dully.

"I had planned to contact you after your duty shift and to offer you a day to consider the situation, but the effects of the stasis field are becoming dangerous to Shyla Moreau's unborn child much sooner than expected. Lieutenant Druschev, you are among the most compatible women for the procedure, and you knew Shyla professionally and personally. Would you consider being her child's surrogate mother?" Doctor Sefton evenly asked, attempting to present the situation as objectively as possible.

The words registered and Natalia's emotional reaction was instant. She burst into tears and shot out of her chair. Her face registered shock, amazement, confusion, grief and hope in a progression almost too fast to comprehend. As she drew in a shaking breath she found that she was already nodding her head, even while she was still trying to come to terms with what the doctor had just laid out to her. Shyla's child was still alive? It wasn't even something she could reject. The idea of being pregnant and carrying a child was the farthest thing from her plans, but it was Shyla's baby and if there was a chance to offer anything of life to her child then.... "Of course." Her voice was croaky and uneven but there was no hesitancy about it. The decision was already made in the part of her mind that was a mother. She'd loved the girl like a younger sister, her only friend on the Sulu, what else was there? "Yes...." Natalia's eyes met those of Damhnait Sefton and she straightened her shoulders and nodded more vigorously. "Yes."

"Before you agree, you need to be made aware of the entire situation," Sefton told her, even though she was preparing for the surgery at the back of her mind. "I am sure you are already aware of the scientific medical risks, but Shyla made a great number of arrangements before she died. She feared she would die in childbirth. The child's legal guardian will be Shyla's father, Dennis Moreau, on Earth, and should the child be born prior to our arrival in the Alpha Quadrant, the child has been entrusted in the care of Cristobel Sefton and Corran Quezith."

Natalia sat down again and digested that. She frowned. "The baby should carry to term? Why did she fear death in childbirth?" This was the first time Natalia had heard this bit of news. It shocked her. "I do understand the risks, but as far as I understand it the procedure has been used many times for surrogates - even cross racial surrogacy. The answer is still yes."

"Simply because a child should carry to term, does not mean that there are no premature births," Damhnait remarked, trying her best not to present the information condescendingly. She hesitated to explain about Shyla's case in particular. If Shyla had chosen not to share her condition with Natalia, it was not Sefton's place to do so, but if the woman was to carry the child, she deserved to know. "Shyla was terminally ill. She was born with Kelway's Syndrome. Under the best circumstances, she would have died young. Childbirth would have been particularly dangerous for her."

Natalia sat back, the shock making her blink. "She knew?" Her voice was quiet, thinking about the situation for a few seconds. "Is there any danger in carrying the child?" she asked. Not that it mattered a great deal, she just wanted to know.

"There are more risks than one would typically expect," Sefton replied seriously. Taking up a spare PADD, Damhnait had the computer compile a report on both the pregnancy dangers that came with a child borne of a parent with Kelway's Syndrome and the dangers of a child who had inherited Kelway's Syndrome. After the computer's quick response, she slid the PADD over to Natalia.

She scanned the PADD, speed-reading. The contents were specific. After digesting it for a few minutes she turned off the PADD and set it down on the desk. "Okay," she said. "That doesn't bother me." It was very sad to think that Shyla knew and didn't tell her. They didn't know if the child would inherit either. Sadness all around. But the child was alive and if Natalia didn't do anything.... "The answer is yes. I will save the child if I can. Please... it would be a gift. To give life in such tragedy."

"Would you like some time to yourself, or with your son, before I contact Counselor Scott for the preliminary evaluation and a nurse to prepare you for the surgery?" Damhnait offered, wanting Natalia to be absolutely certain of her decision, while not forgetting that time was slipping away.

"I don't need time, Doctor. I'll explain the situation to Dom, he'll understand. He loved Shyla too." The very thought of it brought more tears and she wiped them away with a kerchief from her sleeve. "We haven't got that much time. As I understand it, the longer we take the greater the risk of cellular breakdown in stasis...so...let's do it."

She stood on shaky legs. The strain and the shocks multiplying and she felt momentary lightheadedness. She looked across the desk at Damhnait Sefton and nodded. Squaring her shoulders she took a deep breath. "Yes...let's do it now." Her voice was firmer. The decision had been made, now it was fate. Pregnancy had been something Natalia actually enjoyed. She'd had a perfect pregnancy with Domenic, and she had blossomed as a result of the life inside her. She wanted to feel that again - an affirmation of life in such dire circumstances. Even in this hell.

***

"Caly, what do you think about..." Cristobel's mouth suddenly hung open in silence, and his eyes lost their focus. Still staring blankly for several seconds, he muttered a somber, "Oh."

Paddy and the petite chief were in the middle of trying to put two of the components for the main chamber together, and at the sound of Cris' voice her ears perked to listen even though she didn't look up at him. It was the sudden halt in the middle of his question followed by that somber, 'oh' that grabbed her full attention... She cast a glance to Paddy and then looked fully at Cris. "What is it?" Judging by the look on his face, something was wrong.

"The child must be taken out of stasis immediately," Cristobel replied, unsure how he felt about that, other than worried.

Paddy glanced back to Calyca while listening to Cristobel.

Caly looked confused as she tried to process that. All she could finally think of to say was, "But... But we're not ready yet..." Her voice sounded small and weak even to her own ears. "You.... You have to do something to get us more time..." She could feel that sensation rising up in her face that told her tears weren't too far behind. They couldn't lose Shyla's baby now.

Vaguely shaking his head in the negative, Cristobel sounded distant as he shared, "It's the time-giving stasis field that is the problem. ...A surrogate mother is already being prepared for surgery. The baby will be okay. But...we cannot... I guess we...go back to our normal duties...and our other abnormal duties...?"

"Ohh...." Her face cleared and she drew in a breath. After a moment she nodded. "A surrogate is probably much better than a chamber," she agreed with a soft pop of her gum. She didn't understand the vague hint of disappointment she felt. "It'd be a shame to not continue, sir... Shyla's baby aside, the chamber could have many benefits... Although with the child safe, our energies now might be better spent elsewhere. Perhaps we could continue when we're back home? I'd like to volunteer if you decide to..."

Riley quietly took in what Sefton had said and just kept working on the chamber to give his hands a purpose while digesting every word that had been said. The Irishman believed in insurance, so he wasn't going to stop now...even if the chamber wouldn't be used for Shyla's baby...it could always be used for someone else's.

"We do still need to figure how to make it into a productive artificial womb without the speed-aging feature, despite how interlocked the two functions seem to be," Cristobel agreed. "Besides, this is still my official research project, for less stressful times, when the Medical staff is allowed such luxuries."

"Well..." Caly went back to working with Paddy, her hands automatically working in unison with his. "Basically all you really need is nutrient rich environment that can process waste products, right? From what I've read, and I'm sure as hell not even close to being an expert, the womb environment is pretty much a separate thing from the mother. All the mother's body does is feed it and eliminate the waste it creates.... Sounds like what you need is a filtering system, an attachment spot for the placenta, and some synthesized amino fluid...." She glanced over at him. "And that's without any speed-aging stuff.... Am I over simplifying? I like things simple," she admitted.

"That sound accurate," Cris nodded, "but the execution has proven to be far from simple to create an environment that can stably and safely maintain a life that hasn't even become a humanoid formed fetus."

Caly frowned a bit and reached a hand up to absently scratch at the skin under her collar. "But isn't everything pretty much started to form by fourteen weeks?" She was so ignorant about that stuff. But she had read up on it so as not to be totally unable to talk intelligently about it. "So you mean... So far you haven't been able to get all the little minute details established in that kind of environment?"

"I haven't tried this before, but there have been several failed experiments. While Shyla was the reason I started the project, it isn't the only reason for the project. Ideally, the chamber should be able to nurture a life at literally any point after conception -- even much younger than Shyla's child," Cris explained. "It may not be a terribly common danger to prepare for, but there aren't always available surrogate mothers in the middle of tragedies."

He nodded his affirmation of Cris' intent. Continuing to work unabated and without saying much, Paddy grabbed a Pasron spectral filter and slid it into the first of seven monitoring arrays necessary to monitor an infant's life signs.

"Right. I was speaking in the generic 'you'. Sorry, sir," she gave him a faint smile. "So the failed attempts have been in duplicating the womb environment.... What have they used in the past to control it? Didn't they have some limited success with cloning back in the twentieth century? What did they use then?"

"Even current cloning technology isn't without side-effects in later years," Sefton reminded. "Safety is the key word, and, well, assimilation aside, Borg maturation chambers are safer than anything that anyone in the Federation has built."

Caly looked over at him and nodded. "Aye, sir... What matters right now is that the baby will be alright. We can work on this later... Or.. Rather... You can. I'd still like to volunteer my help if and when you decide to continue with it..." She hesitated a moment. "The baby will be alright won't she, sir?"

"Yeah," Cristobel nodded, but sounded distanced again. For a moment -- a brief moment, while they'd been debating the maturation chamber -- he had forgotten it all. Forgotten about Shyla, the Enforcers, the gassing plan, the Gate, the Mirror Universe, everything. And that scared him more than the idea of the pain never leaving.

"I'll definitely need your--" Cristobel started and then stopped when his PADD chimed. Reading it over quickly, he jerked a thumb towards the door and backed towards it, as he murmured, "I need to get back to the med lab." Caly cast a glance in the direction of his jerking thumb, her troubled gaze traveling over Jurell in the process.

"Alright, sir..." Haunted green eyes turned back to Cris. "Paddy and I can straighten up here if you'd like..." she offered and gave Paddy a 'right?' look.

The older chief nodded and proceeded to torque a stainless support rib into place after installing the final circulation pump on that side. As soon as the torque wrench chirped, he set it back in the tool caddy and started the task of picking up tools and unused parts.

"Thank you," Cristobel told them all sincerely, but was still quick to leave the room.

Caly watched him go and then turned to Riley, a thoughtful expression on her face as she moved to help clean up. "So... You, uhh...ever grown a baby before, Paddy?" she asked curiously, and softly popped her gum.

With his hands still picking up tools and parts, Riley replied with a wink, "Not this way, Lass...but the old fashioned way...well now...." He bent over to deposit everything into the caddy. As he straightened up and noted Calyca's questioning smirk, Paddy shrugged, "It's a long story, perhaps later."

"Aye. Later," she agreed, working alongside him to clean up. "I look forward to hearing about it..." She worked in silence for several long moments before finally rambling out the thought that was circulating through her mind.

"In the long run though, I wonder if there's really much difference between life this way," she tapped the chamber they'd started working on, "and life the old fashioned way."

---

"Spider Queen"

Ensign Mason Farrell, Operations
CPO Calyca Boothroyd, Engineering
Crewman Sorg Jurell, Security

Location: USS Sulu, Farrell's Quarters
Stardate: 57910.20, 15h10

***

Caly stepped off the lift and walked down the corridor with Sorg at her side. She stayed close to him and played up someone of her size being overlooked. She stayed in Sorg's shadow, kept to the bulkhead side of him and was as inconspicuous as possible. She was quiet, thoughtful, pensive, not speaking to the tall Bajoran at her side or to anyone else for that matter. She glanced up at Jurell when they reached Mason's quarters and she activated the chime. She knew he wasn't happy, but she couldn't deal with that right now. Strontium, atomic number 38, atomic radius 215.1 pm...

The door opened to Farrell. His hair was wet and rumpled, and he wore nothing but a white towel with a Starfleet arrowhead emblazoned on it in blue.

"Sir," Caly nodded, taking the appearance of the half naked officer in stride and acting as if this was an every day occurrence for her.

Jurell ignored it and was busy looking both directions in the corridor.

"Afternoon," he said pleasantly. "Come on in," he added, turning to head back for the fresher.

Caly slipped in ahead of Sorg, wanting out of the corridor as soon as possible. She quirked a brow at the grizzly disruptor burn scar slashed across Farrell's left shoulder blade and idly wondered how he got it. She wasn't prepared to ask though. Not now. Any other time she likely would have. She was uncharacteristically pack-less and dressed in an old training uniform.

"I'd say 'make yourselves at home'," he joked from the fresher, "but I'm already half naked. That's probably plenty."

"Indeed, sir." She shared a glance with Sorg, offering him a faint smile before looking back towards the fresher. "I suppose I'm reporting as ordered, sir," she called out.

Jurell stood back and waited, silent and wary, yet his face held a hint of a smile.

"Was there anything specific you needed me to do today? Or would you just like an update?" Caly took a look around the room while Farrell was occupied. Looked like it paid to be in Ops. He had some awesome quarters. Damn thing was a suite. And where'd he get that furniture? Maybe he shared his quarters. The little tidbit of information was catalogued and stored away amongst the myriad of other tidbits she stored in that head of hers.

"Just wanted to make sure you're alright, Booter," Farrell called back. He came out of the fresher again, this time in his shorts and tank top. "Sorry," he said as he crossed the room in front of them and headed into his bedroom. "You've caught me getting ready for shift. Keep talking," he called from the other room again. "I'm listening."

She watched him pass by then and gave Jurell a confused sort of, 'what am I suppose to say?' look. But Jurell didn't know either and he shrugged and rolled his eyes. He smiled and scratched his ear, leaning back against the wall casually. She wrinkled her nose at him and stepped towards the doorway Farrell disappeared into. "I'm fine, sir... But I'm not quite sure what it is you want me to keep talking about.... Perhaps I should just give you an update?"

"Sounds good," she heard him say. "What's our status?"

Caly leaned in the doorway with her back against the frame as she pulled out her PADD and punched up one of the maintenance logs. "Decrypt file main_log_beta_one_eight, authorization Booter-zulu-seven-omega-one," she commanded and the maintenance file faded away to be replaced by her spider program. "I've done some prelim subroutines," she told him. She picked up one foot and pressed the sole against the doorframe near her opposite knee. "Now that I have the canister specs inputted from the spiders, I can finish up the sequencing programming. That won't take long. The visuals help," she went on, punching up 007 and taking a look at the canister he was crawling over. "They seem pretty straightforward."

"Excellent. With the spiders doing the activating we can keep the tanks separate from the ship's systems. Excellent," he repeated, zipping his undertunic as he appeared in the doorway, his duty jacket slung over a shoulder. "One command and they all hit the switch? It's got to be simultaneous."

Caly straightened and moved aside for him to exit the bedroom., shutting down the program and sending it back into the bowels of her PADD. "Aye, sir. Give me about half hour's notice for them to all get into position and then it's just a matter of giving them the command and the release will be simultaneous," she agreed as she followed him into the living room part of his quarters and went to stand beside Sorg.

"Excellent," Farrell said again, then noticed they were standing. "Y'all can sit down. Got someplace you need to be? Hot date?" he grinned.

Jurell frowned. "No, sir."

"No, sir," Caly answered and glanced up at Sorg before looking back to Farrell. "I thought you did, though. We wouldn't want to keep you from your shift, sir," she assured him, not sure if they should sit down or not. "Do you have any idea when the release is scheduled? Or even what happens once we take the Enforcers out? The Windsor's gonna notice something like that, I'd think."

"I think the Windsor will only notice we've taken out the Enforcers if we don't cover their communications regime. The TAC Team have been monitoring that, we'll cover it. As long as we hit them all simultaneously immediately after a check in, we'll have time to do what we need to. Lt. Commander Sam can mimic their communications and their voices, it's within his parameters." Jurell crossed his arms. "With the gas attack it takes the danger out of it - I would suggest a simultaneous force field erected around the two Computer Cores, Bridge and Main Engineering to prevent any last second damage. We've also been on the lookout for explosives...so far they haven't planted any against an uprising." He looked at Calyca. "Your spiders will be useful on the Away Mission, too. We can transport them inside the reactor spaces with explosives, program them to self navigate. Spin their explosive webs around the containment systems and blow them while we're doing other things."

Caly listened and quirked a brow, impressed. She knew the TAC Team was in hiding, but not what they'd been up to. That alleviated some of her fears at any rate. "My spiders?" she looked thoughtful and nodded. "Okay. that's workable. I'll need to get into a chemlab so I can make some of my explosives... and I'll need schematics of the containment systems and the reactors...." she mused, almost to herself, the fingers of one hand working lightly in the air. "I'll need to be close enough to get commands to them...." She blinked and looked at the two men, wondering if she was getting ahead of herself, something she tended to do. "Just... Uh.. Let me know what you need."

"You don't need them," Sorg smiled. "All you need is one torpedo case, we can rip out the proton and anti-proton packets and use several containment cells from the life-sciences lab. program the spiders to drop the containment shells...instant antimatter explosion. It would be low yield but far more effective than chemical explosives, and we don't need to remove the torp from inventory, or risk being discovered making the compounds."

She looked thoughtful and her fingers moved slowly in the air. "Hmmm.... That would work," she agreed, a little glint lighting in the depths of her eyes. "Never mixed antimatter explosions with my spiders before," she admitted. "And low yield or not, it'll sure make one hell of a bang..." She was hooked.

Sorg grinned. "No mess...until after. If you set them up for simultaneous detonation, we'll need five spiders, one for each of the five fusion reactors. Set them off above the containment system controllers and you can force multiply with the five fusion reaction chambers losing containment. It should blow straight up the spindle of the station and radiate out for at least a hundred kilometers, so we need to be well away when they blow. I'd set them on a time delay trigger...that okay?"

Caly was nodding and her fingers were moving and she was already starting to work the particulars out in her head. "Delay trigger is no problem," she agreed. "But are you sure simultaneous is best? If you sequence them just a smidge, the ensuing explosions should grow exponentially because each consecutive one would have the fusion breach of the one before to add to it," she offered thoughtfully. "The whole thing would be like this huge spiral going off..."

"I thought of that," he nodded, "the only problem is that the wave front of the first explosion will travel faster than the second trigger. You might just end up with a single bomb detonation. Simultaneously all five antimatter packets would combine in a ring pattern that will force the plasma upward. The containment systems are at the lowest level of the internal hull. Like an plasma torpedo spread - or a cone shaped blast area that will encompass the entire station."

Caly frowned a little. "If you did a shaped charge you could direct them... But you could just as easily end up inadvertently sending the blast downwards," she pointed out. "With a spiral you could direct it upwar-- Hmmm.... Or stagger them along the length of the reactors... So that the upper blasts would pull at the lower ones... I need to see the schematics... The design..."

He frowned. "The reactors are set in a ring pattern at the lowest point of the station. They are all on the same level. Right at the bottom of the spindle. The TAC Team have already looked at the station and its layout from what Commander T'Kal relayed. A DS9 station with some cosmetic changes. You can't shape charge an anti-matter explosion."

"I know. That was my point," she nodded. "I'll pull up a DS9 station plan and take a look at it. How'd the TAC Team get a look at the station?"

"It's a DS9 station...supposed to be the same...out of the archives of course." Jurell shrugged.

Caly nodded. "Have you studied DS9 plans? Want to go over them with me later?" she asked him.

"Yes I have, and yes I would." He grinned.

"Good." Caly actually smiled back. The first genuine smile to actually reach her eyes since the incident in the Probe hold. She turned to Farrell then and even gave him a very small smile. "Are we done then, sir? You'll be in contact with me?"

"You should probably contact me, seeing as how y'all have better access to the timetable than I do," Farrell shrugged affably, thoroughly amused. "A word of caution, though. We're putting an awful lot of stock in an awful lot of assumptions. Seeing as how no-one we know's actually been to this station, I'd advise that any plan be kept soft. If something's not what we expected, I'd rather fall back on a contingency plan than have to improvise from whole cloth."

Caly blinked and looked at Sorg. "You have access to the timetable?" She was clueless and looked back to Farrell. "I don't even know what plan there is, sir. Except for what little bit Sorg just told us. But I can certainly understand keeping it soft," she agreed.

"Not really," he said, shrugging. "I get updated."

"And you didn't tell me?" She lightly fwapped the back of her hand against his stomach which she couldn't help but notice was surprisingly rock hard and couldn't help the brief lingering touch. "I don't believe you didn't tell me," she teased a bit grumbly.

"Need to know," he said seriously.

Caly quirked a brow at that and then slid her hands in her pockets as she listened.

"Is there anything I need to get to you, sir? I've been passing intel to the TAC Team." He reached behind his back and pulled out an ordinary PADD. "This is full of literary references, sir, all you need to do is transcribe your message and activate the search program using your authority code and Tango Alpha Charlie One. The PADD will search the references and send the message using a transcription code and a one-time tag. It can't be used twice, but it's a way to get a message directly to the team if you have something they need to know or if you need help."

She didn't interrupt, didn't ask questions, didn't even watch them directly. She watched her toes instead, reaching up to absently tug at the control collar and scratch the skin under it.

"Nice," Farrell said, taking the PADD and stretching the word to show appreciation. "I'll keep this in mind. Thanks. And Booter?"

Caly looked up from contemplating her toes with a questioning look in her eyes. "Sir?"

"Thank you for being part of it all. Your spiders are going to be invaluable."

She smiled a little then, her second genuine one since the incident. "No, thank you, sir, for letting us be involved. The guys are excited they get to do something other than watch me."

"That's nice of you to say," Farrell gave a friendly smile, "but I'm not really in charge of anything. We all had some ideas, and happened to sit down to breakfast together. All I was was the first to bring it up. Frankly, I'd rather watch you."

Jurell looked at Farrell with a carefully neutral expression. He wondered what else the operations officer was thinking. The man did have a certain reputation with the ladies, even though he'd been seeing Counselor Chambers.

Caly blinked and offered a rather light, rueful sound that might have passed for a laugh. "That's likely because you don't have spider parts, sir," she deadpanned. "And I think you're having a fair hand in the organizing. Something that's as important, if not more so than the planning itself. Things start to fall apart if the horse's head doesn't know what its ass-end is doing."

"Which am I?" Farrell asked, his voice richly laced with humor.

The small, genuine grin that curved her lips was automatic and not something that even her recent trauma could prevent. "Can I get back to you on that, sir?"

Farrell chuckled. "You bet. Was there anything else we needed to discuss here?" he added, glancing to the PADD in his hand again.

"No, sir," Caly shook her head and looked to Jurell. "We should go so Mister Farrell can get to work," she commented and looked back to Farrell. "The boys and I will be ready, sir. You don't need to worry about that." She lightly touched Jurell's arm and started for the door.

He nodded at Farrell. "Good day, sir," he said politely with a hint of a smile. He followed Caly to the door but was careful to be the first one out, stepping aside to let her exit when he was sure it was safe. The incident in the Probe hold had upset her enough that she didn't mind his caution right now, and a large part of her welcomed it. The reality was...wWere any of them really safe....

---

"Tea Would Be Good"
By: Crewman Sorg Jurell, Security
CPO Calyca Boothroyd, Engineering

Location: USS Sulu, Turbolift 3, and Boothroyd's Quarters
Stardate: 57910.20, 15h35

***

Caly was quiet as she and Jurell left Farrell's quarters, not quite subdued, but nearly so. She walked with her hands in her pockets and once again maximized on that 'overlooked' thing that often happened to someone her size. She stayed on the bulkhead side of Sorg, walked close to him, and unconsciously kept him between her and anyone else without being obvious about it. She looked up at the turbolift doors when they reached it, and as they stepped inside Jurell leaned against the wall and crossed his arms, a slight smile on his face as he looked at the door frame.

The tiny etched heart and arrow showed about halfway up. One of the duty engineer's mates had done it several weeks ago to signify that this was the lucky lift. He looked over at Caly as she stepped into the lift behind him and chuckled. She needed space. He had to remember that.

She was frowning slightly as she leaned her back against the wall opposite him. She thumped the toe of one foot with the heel of the other, crossed her ankles, jiggled her foot, went back to thumping heel to toe again and finally started searching her pockets for some gum. She let out her breath with a soft huff when she finally located a piece. "I don't get it," she blurted out of the blue as she unwrapped the gum and popped it in her mouth.

It wasn't until then that she lifted her head and looked at him directly. "I don't get what you get out of this relationship," she told him. "I'm not attentive... I forget about you when I get my nose in something... I forget our meetings... I don't do girl things... It seems to me that I'm the one doing all the taking and you're the one doing all the giving..... Don't you feel used? I feel like I'm using you," she admitted. "It's not like I mean to... It just happens... I refuse to change and so I get to just stay the same while you have to do all the bending... I just don't get it..." she said again. That she was bothered by this whole line of thought was evident in her eyes as she looked over at him.

Jurell frowned and gave it a little thought. "Why should I feel used? You don't make me do anything I don't want to do. I don't have to be any different with you than I am." He looked a little confused. "Is that what you're worried about? Prophets girl, I don't want you to do girlie things. Do I look like the kinda guy that appreciates girlie crap? Sure I like it when you dress up and I take you out, but I hate women who are needy and always want you to do things for them like they're useless. I hate that!" He grinned. "I'm self absorbed, Cal, busy most of the time, in training, you think you forget me - and I don't even realise it because I'm too busy!" He laughed, and it was an easy sound.

"I enjoy your company. We can talk all night - and I've never been able to talk all night with a woman before! We just click - haven't you noticed? I want to be around you - but I don't want to be smothered. You're just perfect for me...believe me. You're beautiful, intelligent, funny! I love the way you think, and do the little...." He drew in the air with a finger. "I get plenty from our relationship, and I think you do too. Am I wrong?"

Now it was her turn to frown in thought. Her foot went back to jiggling and she popped her gum as she lowered her eyes and contemplated her bouncing toes. After a moment or two, she started absently going through her pockets again until she finally pulled out another piece of gum to offer him. When he took it, his fingers moved over hers and he exchanged it for the small tube the nurse had given him, tucking it gently in her hand. "For the neck," he absently said as he unwrapped the gum.

When she looked at him again, her eyes were a bit distant, troubled, thoughtful and definitely not focused on him. She was only marginally aware that she'd offered him the gum, and the fingers of her free hand began making very subtle motions in the air. He was right about so many things. She did enjoy his company, and even...gods forbid...liked that he paid attention to her. They could talk all night. They did seem to click and he just seemed to instinctively understand things about her; things that she couldn't put into words even if she tried and was likely unaware of them herself. And she knew she'd miss him if he was just suddenly not there any more.

Her frown deepened and she let out a little huff of breath before answering with an honest, "No, you're not wrong." Her eyes lost their distant look and focused on him. They were still troubled, still thoughtful, and still haunted. "I've never noticed that you were self absorbed," she admitted rather inanely and sighed again, her hands burying deep in her pockets with the tube he'd given her clenched in one of them. "I like it when we talk all night," she admitted. "I don't think I could smother or be really needy... But I am afraid I could get clingy sometimes." Like now, after last night, she could feel that tendency wanting to rear its ugly head. "I just never saw you really getting anything from it," she told him. "And except for the talking all night thing, you'd probably be better off with a good dog," she teased slightly and gave him a wry half smile.

"Oh...I think you'll do." He grinned and chewed. "I can't dance with a dog...and damn you look good in that little black dress. I happen to be extremely attracted to you as well...just thought you should know. In case you wondered.... "

"I did," she admitted. It made her frown deepen and the furrows creasing her brow became more pronounced. "But even I could figure out that part." Her cheeks tinged with just a hint of color at her words and she popped her gum in slight agitation because she could feel it. She was thankfully distracted by the announcement of the elevator when they reached their destination. After a brief look towards the doors, her eyes went back to his and she gave him a faint smile as she straightened from the wall. "So... Talking and dancing are all that separates me from a good dog, huh?" she asked as the doors to the lift opened.

"And a great ass," he chuckled and stepped in front of her just before the door opened. "And beautiful eyes," he counted on his fingers.

Caly blinked and sputtered a bit, her mouth opening to protest, only to snap closed when he stepped in front of her. She tipped her head back to look up at the back of his head, so he missed those beautiful eyes of hers snapping warmly, torn between laughing and smacking him. In the end, she wound up smiling a little and poking him in the ribs with a softly spoken, "Scoundrel."

"Very kissable lips," he counted, making her wrinkle her nose and toss a look in his direction. "Pretty little button nose...." He stepped out of the lift and stopped.

Two red-clad Enforcers stood right outside waiting to get in. Both of them stood aside, and with the big Bajoran stepping right in front of them, they automatically unhooked painsticks.

Jurell put both hands up at waist height and away from his body. It was the universal sign of unarmed but it also effectively stopped Caly from walking out of the lift. It didn't stop her from nearly walking into him though, and she instinctively lifted a hand to his lower back, bracing herself. "Hey," he said, the smile still playing around his lips. "Just working here," he said casually. His eyes flicked over both of them, gauging the threat level. Both of them had been startled by Jurell's exit, no real drama.

"Hand." The taller Enforcer held out his palm reader.

Jurell gave him a smile and slowly placed his palm on the device. A second later the Enforcer looked up and said, "Sorg Jurell. Assigned to Engineering...step aside." He waved at Caly. "Step forward, hold out your hand."

The other Enforcer had taken a further step back and had one hand on his phaser, with the weapon pointing down and almost in the direction of the two Starfleet officers.

Caly's heart was thudding hard enough that she thought everyone around her could hear. Raw, instant flashbacks of Crix bludgeoning Shyla flooded into her mind and she had to forcibly fight back the panic attack that threatened to send her screaming down the corridor. She was trembling by the time she stepped out from around Jurell and held out her hand, placing her palm on the reader.

Her panic intensified to the point of nearly overcoming her as she grasped frantically for the Periodic Table, unable for several heartbeats to recall even a single element. Not one. Not until Jurell's hand settled on her shoulder with a slight comforting squeeze that told her he was there and at the same time it would allow him to pull her away from the two men should anything bad happen. He was looking very relaxed; the smile still on his face.

"Caleeka Boothroid," the Enforcer said with a slight smile for her. She was very attractive and had wide green eyes that looked filled with fear. "Engineer." Hollifar glanced up into the Bajoran's face and saw no fear at all; just startling blue eyes that held his.

Sorg's touch had the desired effect. Something inside her settled and Hydrogen bloomed through the recesses of her mind. She drew in a steadying breath, her back stiffening slightly as the panic eased down to something she could control. Once she wrapped her thought process around the element and all its information, the panic disappeared and she settled into putting the facts into some semblance of order.

The Enforcer glanced at Jurell's hand on her shoulder. To Caly it was a warm grounding presence. To Hollifar, it looked possessive and at the same time reassuring. He was obviously trying to calm her fear and judging by the look in her eyes, Hollifar noted as he looked back at them, it had done so. But she had been afraid. Very afraid.

"Stand back," he said to Jurell. Hollifar's tone was menacing. The Bajoran was big, and his uniform showed a muscular frame that was easily the match of Hadek's. The information on the screen of the palm-reader said that he was Sulu security. It showed. Jurell still smiled and he even nodded. He moved off to the side rather than away one pace. It was an easy step that brought him away from Argren with the phaser and still kept him in line of sight. He wasn't doing anything to avoid their weapons, every movement had been slow and measured. It said don't mind me I won't fight in every gesture.

Caly stood a bit taller when Jurell was ordered to step back and she lost his touch. She wasn't going to cower or look away. She wasn't defiant in any way and she couldn't hide the haunted look in her eyes or the slight darkness under them even if the fear was no longer evident in their depths. Hollifar started to search her and came up with a couple of padds, no tools. A quick look at the Bajoran security officer and he saw a tool pouch slung around his shoulders. Hollifar grinned as he turned back to Calyca.

"Got yourself a Gofer there," he waved absently at Jurell. "About all the Sulu's security officers are good for." He chuckled at the joke., Argren only smiled, not taking his eyes off the Bajoran for a second. Caly'd stood quietly as she was searched and her PADDs taken. Nothing in her face changed or registered her annoyance at his 'joke'; one corner of her lips actually quirked a bit as she purposefully tried to look like she got it and may or may not agree.

The Enforcer activated the padds and scrolled through the first one. Engineering Maintenance logs, lists of parts, storage codes, technical details on ship systems...the other was the same. Caly remained silent and unmoving as he randomly opened one of the files to find it was filled with mundane engineering details. He screwed up his face in a grimace of all things technical and gave the two padds back to the silent girl. It wasn't that she didn't trust her voice. But she didn't want to encourage any kind of familiarity. His next words let her know that her efforts had been a lesson in futility.

He gave her a smile. "We're not that bad," he said to her. "My name's Hollifar. What say we meet up later for a drink in your Lounge?"

They were brutes. Sadistic brutes. They'd taken the Sulu, taken the Captain... Gods knew what they were doing to him... They'd brutally murdered Shyla. They'd shown at every opportunity just how brutal they could be, and he expected her to believe they weren't 'that bad'? When pigs flew out his butt maybe. And go for a drink with him? Right. When hell froze over. Her answer was polite, but let him know she wasn't interested. Caly had gotten pretty proficient over the years at turning down offers gracefully and without making it seem like a rebuke. "Thank you, but I'm afraid not. I don't drink and I have a report that I need to finish."

Hollifar raised an eyebrow, but he wasn't one to push Tebrianne's rules. Crix had been a perfect example of why not. It had served to remind all of the Enforcers that the only one who might consider arguing was Hadek. The Romulan woman was just too damned fast with her blade and of course she was T'Briane's favorite. "Too bad," he murmured to Calyca, "you don't know what you're missing, little lady." His grin was sly, and meaningful.

Jurell wanted to tear the grin physically from his face. Yet his smile remained. It didn't even look forced. His balance shifted slightly, and his eyes judged the angles through peripheral vision. He readied himself to take both of them.

"Go back to work," Hollifar commanded in a harsher tone.

"Come on, Cal," Jurell said softly. "Thank you, gentlemen." He nodded to each in turn and waved Calyca ahead of him. She didn't let the distaste she felt show on her face and even managed a faint apologetic look towards the guards. She instinctively followed his directing wave without even a moment's hesitation. As she moved off he dropped in directly behind her, glancing back to see the two Enforcers already standing in the turbo-lift. The doors closed on them and Jurell let out a breath. "You were fine," he said as he turned back to her. "Nice refusal," he said with a grin.

"Bastards..." Her hands were shaking as she brought them up and ran them through her hair, reaction was setting in now that the goons were gone. "I wasn't sure it'd work on him," she admitted. "Subtlety sometimes doesn't work against brutes that think with their di-- er... hormones..." she corrected. "Geezus.... They make me sick to my stomach," she admitted as one hand pressed against her abdomen. "I'm glad now I took the security restriction off my PADDs." Her quarters weren't far from the lift and they were soon within sight of them.

His steadying hand settled on her shoulder again, as he said, "These guys aren't brutes in the literal sense. They are extremely well trained, and they all have intelligence. I'd think that survival in this place depends on those qualities. Cunning intelligence too. They seemed to operate well together as a pair," he summed up the two as if he were complimenting them. "I'm glad the senior staff came up with the gas attack," he said quietly. "We'd sure as hell lose crew if it came to a firefight. The inoculation idea worries me though. There's too much room for a slipup. I don't know why they just don't gas the section that the Enforcers are going to be in with a short duration debilitant and just subdue them."

"I gave up questioning the wisdom of the senior staff a while back... Perhaps it's as simple as...no one thought of it," she offered. "Maybe you should suggest it," she smiled faintly at him. "I know they're not brutes in the literal sense. They scare me too much to be those." She glanced back at him, clearly worried about something but was forestalled from addressing it as they reached her quarters, and then the moment was gone.

"You going to be okay?" he asked. "Do you want me to stick around?"

She was suddenly and irrationally terrified at the thought of being left alone. She had to draw in a steadying breath before she could activate the door and step inside. She turned to face him, leaving enough room that he could easily enter if he wanted. "I don't want to be alone," she admitted truthfully. "But I don't want you to stick around if you have something you need, or want to do."

He stepped inside with a smile. "Just asking...in the interests of .. space." He unslung her tool bag. "You know, I didn't realise just how much I used a damned replicator until I couldn't access one. I need coffee but I don't feel like sitting under the watchful gaze of those Enforcers to get one." He reached out and touched her cheek in a purely affectionate manner. "You don't want to be alone...and I don't want to leave you alone." His voice was a soft caress too.

The relief on her face and in her eyes when he stepped inside was almost tangible. She reached up and cupped his hand so she could briefly press her cheek into his touch. "Thank you for staying," she smiled a little and her hand lingered for a moment, her fingertips brushing his knuckles before lowering. "The 'space' I need isn't physical," she told him quietly. "I can probably make us some tea if you'd like...."

He didn't drop his hand, he just caressed her cheek with his thumb for a moment and gazed into her eyes. "Tea would be nice. Where will you get the tea? or the cups?" He felt the urge to lean in and kiss her for no reason than to feel her lips against his for a moment. He didn't do it, but she could tell by the look in his eyes; it was the same expression he always had when he was thinking about kissing her. And as always, it paused her thought process and she became mesmerized by it.

"Glasses...." She gazed up at him, her eyes wide and still haunted. "I have the tea..." There was a barely discernable sway of her body towards his and she let out her breath with a soft huff before whispering, "Are you going to kiss me?"

It sounded a little more like an invitation than a question as she gazed into his eyes, and so he leaned down, very slowly, staring deeply into her eyes the whole time as he brought his lips to hers, tilting her chin up with his hand until they were a breath apart. She was mesmerized by the look in his eyes and couldn't look away or even breathe while he closed the distance between them. Her fingers clenched the material covering his broad chest as she watched those blue eyes draw closer and closer.

She'd wanted him to kiss her. She realized that the instant his lips finally brushed hers and her breath escaped in a small huff of emotion that wafted warmly into his mouth. He closed his eyes and kissed her then. He was barely conscious of his arm sliding around her waist and pressing into the small of her back as he pressed his lips to hers in a gentle but deep kiss. Her arms slid up to wind around his neck, helping to press her lithe body against his as she kissed him back, her lashes fluttering closed to rest like shadows on the gentle swell of her cheeks..

For the first time since the "Probe incident", the horror that had constantly plagued her faded into the background as her mind and senses were filled with him. She became a little desperate for the kiss to not end and so deepened it by surrendering to it with a soft moan and a gripping of her elbows as she clung to him. She felt Jurell's arms tighten around her, his body melting against hers as the kiss continued beyond anything either of them had planned.

It was a long time before Jurell finally broke away, and even then it was only to gain breath and kiss her lips with soft touches as he tried to quell his raging heartbeat. He brushed his lips against her chin and cheek, and back to those perfectly bowed and kissable lips. He breathed in her scent. Those fragrant oils she used were the same ones he'd recognized in sickbay as the first impression of her when he awoke. Her response had heightened his desire for her, yet he knew that this was not the right time for anything but the kiss, and so he made it last as long as he could. He was consumed by the sensation, totally focused on the kiss and the awareness of her softness pressed tightly to him.

Caly kept her eyes closed and her face turned up to him. He had kissed her breathless and her own heartbeat was racing and thudding strongly against her chest. She wasn't aware of it though. She was only aware of him... His scent and taste, the feel of his strong arms holding her securely, the sensation of his body pressed against hers. She murmured his name at one point, but it was little more than an exhale of breath that carried the vibration of his name washing warmly over his moistened lips as she tugged on the bottom one, the gentle pull lasting for several heartbeats before she let him direct the kiss to its conclusion.

Finally he couldn't take any more, and breathless he broke the kiss to look into her eyes. Their reaction to each other was a surprise for them both - especially her, he could see it in the bemused depths of her eyes. Jurell smiled tenderly, still holding her, yet now with a softer embrace. The moment of silence was punctuated only by the mingling of their ragged breaths and the softness of his hand against her cheek as she pressed lightly into his touch.

"I think...tea...would be...good," he managed to whisper, yet he didn't want to let her go. A sentiment that was clearly echoed by her continued and even slightly tightening hold on him. She let out a soft huff of breath and a tiny shudder of reaction moved through her body when his warm breath washed over her.

"Tea..." she repeated, the tone of her voice reflecting the bemused look that clung to the depths of eyes that never left his. She leaned in and took hold of his top lip in a soft kiss that lasted for just a heartbeat, maybe two before she pulled back, her lips clinging to his until the last possible moment. "...would be... good..." she breathed.

"Hmmm," he agreed softly, humming a response as he followed her lips and kissed their willing softness again. The urge to draw away had been completely defeated by her last tender kiss, and he drew on her sighing breath as he plucked softly at her bottom lip, causing it to quiver and her arms to tighten around him. His eyes once again fluttered closed as he responded to the tremor and press of her body against his. He sighed, a soft moan escaping his lips as he fell once more into a long kiss that pulled her headlong and willingly in with him.

She surrendered to the kiss again, letting it flood her senses as she wrapped her mind around it. Everything else was blocked out by the sense of him that filled her. She liked kissing him. He'd been right about that. She couldn't think, and right now she didn't want to think. Not about anything. She kissed him back, moaning softly at the pleasure and warmth she couldn't help feeling. It was finally Caly who pulled back this time, panting for breath and trembling in reaction.

Jurell took a longer time in opening his eyes. He was trembling and the desire for her was strong; amazingly strong. He rested his forehead against hers as he tried to breathe deeper and steadier to no avail. When his eyes opened his ice blue gaze was turned almost black as his pupils focused on her. His heart was racing, and he was filled only with a sense of her; an awareness that wiped out everything else. He couldn't get his mind to function in order to say anything. After a moment of swimming in her wide green eyes he managed a smile.

Her eyes were nearly translucent as they gazed into his. Bemusement danced in their depths and hinted at her own growing attraction. There was also, for the moment, no sign of the haunted look that had pervaded them since the she'd opened her eyes to him in sickbay. He could see the indigo depths of his eyes reflected in hers as she struggled to catch her own breath. One arm slid from around his neck and she pressed trembling fingers to his lips when he smiled, just managing to get them between their mouths. "...N-no more kisses..." she panted and smiled softly. "...You drive... all rational...thoughts from my head." Her fingertips lightly rubbed over his lips and their faces were a hair's breadth apart. "... and...and you...you make me...feel good," she added with a soft whisper.

He kissed her fingertips, reaching up to press them more firmly to his lips as he gazed into her eyes. They were standing together, he bending down to meet her, and he closed his eyes as he kissed her palm and the soft flesh of her thumb, and then the pulse point of her slender wrist.

She blinked and let out her breath in a soft huffing "...ooohhh..." The sensations he was causing by his kisses confounded her. It had her pulse leaping against his lips and her body sagging against his in response. "B-Bajoran scoundrel," she accused and a delicate shudder moved through her body. "...T-thought thief...."

His eyes opened to meet hers and he kissed her palm again, her fingers curling slightly in his hand as the delicate sensations had their effect and all she could do was stare up at him. He didn't smile, he was long past that. He brought her hand down to his chest where her fingers could curl against his heart and she could feel the thudding of it against his chest. She closed her eyes as he leaned in and nuzzled her cheek, his lips grazing her soft skin. "I am...yours," he breathed against her ear, causing a light rash of goosebumps to rise on her neck and her stomach to leap in reaction to his words. His arm was supporting her weight now since she had sagged against him, and the slender arm around his neck tightened as she clung to him.

She let out a soft sound of confused semi-protest and her fingers tightened in the material of his uniform. "Dammit, Jurell..." she groaned softly and buried her nose against his throat. "..I.. I can barely take care of myself..." she murmured and pressed more tightly against him. "I don't think..." She pulled in a shaky breath and slid the soft contours of her face over his until she was looking at him, green eyes large and troubled and translucent. They echoed the confusion she was feeling. "I don't think I can take care of you too...."

"Let me take care of you," he whispered into her mouth as he kissed her again, pulling on her bottom lip and lifting her onto her toes as his arms went around her waist. It was another soft, grazing and almost agonizingly slow kiss that allowed them both to feel the delightful pressure of their bodies pressed together.

His words caused an ache deep inside her that she didn't understand. "Damn you," she whispered against his lips and kissed him back, her touch as soft as a dragonfly's wings and achingly tender. Her hand slid up from his chest and she secured both arms around his neck once again, clinging to him. Her curse was nothing more than an expression of her frustration and confusion. "I...I n-need to think..." she finally told him as she pulled soft, clinging lips from his enough to murmur.

"I need you," he whispered, brushing her lip with his. Her arms around his neck felt wonderful. Her fragrance permeated his surroundings and he breathed it in as he drank in her eyes.

She shuddered softly at his words, shaking her head a little even as he kissed her. "I... dammit..." she groaned.

He leaned down slightly and lifted her until she was back in his arms as she had been when he'd carried her from Sickbay. It made her gasp softly and hold onto him as she suddenly found herself cradled in his arms. He gave her a tender smile as he walked to her sofa and sat down, with her sitting across his lap.

Her padd pressed into her hip, a gentle reminder of what she should be doing. She didn't budge though. Instead she settled into his lap and her body molded to the contours of his as she let her breath out in a soft huff. "I do need to work..." she murmured softly, her eyes gazing up into his.

He brushed the back of his fingers across her cheek, and the fingertips down the curve of her chin to her throat and neck, gazing into her eyes and leaving a trail of shivering goosebumps in the wake of his touch. He just nodded as she spoke about work, knowing that it was true and yet he wanted to be selfish for just a little while longer. He wanted her attention while he had it, knowing that they were heading into harm's way and the possibilities that held for them. He could also see her own reluctance in the depths of her eyes. She didn't want to give up this respite from thinking any more than he did, even though she knew she had to.

"Caly..." he breathed her name as he kissed her, his arms tightening around her as she shuddered and sagged against him, kissing him back with an achingly soft tenderness that had his heart skipping a beat and his breath catching in his throat. It had a similar effect on her, causing her insides to melt as once again her senses became saturated with him.

Time seemed suspended. There was only the kiss and her eyes that captured him when they were open. Trembling, he cupped her face, and revelled whole-heartedly in sharing her breath and lips, tongues entwining as desire edged into passion. His strong hand smoothed over her arm and side, roaming her back and hip. A tremor moved through her and she pulled back hastily, gasping for breath and utterly confused by what she was feeling. It scared her because she could feel herself starting to lose control, could feel herself getting sucked into some kind of swirling vortex of emotions that threatened to overpower her and take control. She didn't understand that she was experiencing her own budding desire.

She pulled her arms from his neck and settled shaking hands on his upper chest as she drew in a shuddering breath and stared at him in confusion. "T-that's... That goes...beyond not...thinking," she panted.

He was trying himself to pull back from the brink and she could see the same emotions raging in his eyes, yet he knew full well what it was. He drew in a shuddering breath and was only able to nod as his hands closed over hers. His heart hammered in his chest, and his chest ached with a tightness that only looking into her eyes brought. "Tea...?" he managed weakly, his voice thick with emotion.

She pulled in a shaking breath and leaned her brow gently towards the backs of his hands. "T-tea...." she repeated and her fingers clenched into the material under them. Gods she was so hot. She closed her eyes and tried to get her breathing and heartbeat back to normal. "I-I'll get it... in just a minute..." She couldn't quite bring herself to move.

He could feel her heat too and he chuckled then, sliding his arms around her and drawing her against him in an embrace as she sat astride him on the sofa. He just held her, feeling the beating of her heart against his chest. He let her calm down, and allowed himself to breathe easier. "Wow girl," he chuckled, "you really know how to kiss. Damn it's hot...."

Her arms wrapped back around his neck and she rested her head on his shoulder. His chuckle made her smile and she listened to the beating of his heart as it settled into some semblance of normal and her own agitated body quieted. At his words, she picked her head up and gave him a look. "I didn't do it by myself," she pointed out with a small huff of breath. "And I didn't know how until some Bajoran scoundrel taught me."

"Oh no, girl...I did not teach you that. That is all you...and Prophets, you drive me crazy." He smiled, and chuckled, his chest shuddering with mirth.

Caly blinked and sat up. "Hah! Then I suppose it was that other guy I found to practice with," she smirked. "Not you, indeed," she huffed and eyed him. "So... Do you still want some tea?"

"Yeah...it might help," he smiled. "But first I want to tell you something." His voice was soft and his eyes were a wide ultra-blue. "I've never met a woman like you, Calyca Llewellyn Boothroyd, and I want you to know that there won't be any other girls but you. Just so you know...I want you."

She watched him with wide green eyes that searched his and his face as he spoke. Her hand moved and her fingertips brushed lightly over his lips when he was through. His words did funny things to her stomach and she let out her breath with a soft huff before answering him, her eyes staying clear and on his. "I never met a man like you, Sorg Jurell," she admitted softly. "You confound me, confuse me, mess up my orderly mind, throw spanners in my thought process, turn me into a moaning idiot, and then you make me weak with your kisses. You scare the hell out of me," she admitted, although her voice and eyes didn't hold any real fear of him.

"I like the moaning idiot part," he grinned, "reminds me of me. But you have nothing to fear from me at all. I'll always respect your boundaries, I'll never ask for more than you're willing to give, and I'll always be there for you." He was absolutely serious.

She sobered and her eyes gazed into his as she gave his serious words the attention and focus they deserved. She finally let out a soft huff of breath and smiled a bit. "I believe you," she answered simply. And for whatever reasons, she did. "I... I'm not sure what to say," she admitted frankly. "I trust you, Jurell," she smiled a little ruefully. "I'm not sure why exactly... But I do. Even more than Shiri... Just in a different way. And I'll always be honest with you," she added. "I'm not sure that I can ever give you what you want... I just don't know if I have anything like that in me," she told him as honestly and frankly as she could. "I don't want to hurt you."

"Just be you...and you'll never hurt me," he said simply. "You already give me what I want...so relax and let everything just come naturally. I trust you too, Caly, more than any other woman I've ever met. I know you won't mean to hurt me, and that's all I need." He cupped her cheeks in his large hands and kissed her squarely, yet gently for just a moment. "Is there any way that you can rig your spiders for the away mission without you going? I don't like the idea of putting you in harm's way like that...it scares the Pagh Wraiths out of me."

She relaxed as she listened to him, a small smile lifting the corner of her lips a bit. "Scares the what out of you?" she couldn't help asking and shook her head a bit. "Maybe... If I had exact specs on where they needed to go, the route they had to take to get there, and where they needed to set the explosives. And then I'd need the exact time you wanted the explosives to go off. But once they're programmed, if anything is off, you're screwed. I can only stick so many variables in their subroutines. If anything needed to be changed or adjusted, I'd be too far away to do it." She relaxed into his arms and pulled the PADDs from her waist, settling them between their bodies. "We've got a ton of work to do. And I won't cower from danger, Jurell," she added quietly.

"I know," he whispered, his voice filled with concern. "That's what I'm afraid of." He ran a hand across her thigh as he watched her, and knew that she would go. She really had to. There was no escaping it. It was duty. He smiled as he gripped the PADDs and pulled them from her fingers. "Tea," he said simply. "Before you wander away from me and get lost in spiders... Oh, Spider Queen." He grinned.

"Spider queen?" she sputtered and couldn't help the quiet laugh. She wiggled her fingers at him menacingly and warned, "Be careful, I spin a wicked web." Her face softened and she lifted a hand to cup his face. "I'm not foolish. I won't take unnecessary risks and I'll do what I need to keep safe," she assured him. "Now... Tea, and then I need your help." She brushed her thumb over his bottom lip and offered him a reassuring smile. The haunted look was still at bay... For the moment anyway.

She slipped from his lap and moved through her quarters, finding the spicy tea her mother had given her and then disappearing into the fresher where she ordered hot water from the computer and filled up the only glass she had. She dropped in the tea bag and made her way back to where she'd left Jurell. "We'll have to share," she told him with a smile. "This was faster than breaking out my chemistry things." She settled onto the sofa next to him, handing the glass of brewing tea to him and snagging one of her PADDs from his lap.

"I love resourceful women." Jurell grinned and stirred the tea, watching the cloud of golden brown liquid. He took a sip and passed it to her. "That's not bad at all. What are the spices in it?" It was slightly bitter, but carried a tang and a pleasant aftertaste that cleansed the pallet.

She sat cross-legged beside him, smiling over at him as he enjoyed the tea. "I'm not sure actually..." She took the glass and sipped, passing it back to him. "Something my mother got on some obscure diplomatic training mission," she told him and turned her gaze down to her PADD as she pulled up the maintenance file. "I'm going to finish the sub-routines for the gas release," she told him quietly. "And then I'm going to show you how to activate it... Just in case." She glanced over at him, her eyes deadly serious before turning back to the PADD. "Decrypt file main_log_beta_one_eight, authorization Booter-zulu-seven-omega-one," she commanded and the maintenance file faded away to be replaced by her spider program.

"Good," he replied. "Perhaps you'd better put something in there that allows me to get at it too," he suggested. He sipped and then took another and passed it back.

She waved off the glass of tea and nodded. "I planned on it. Otherwise you wouldn't be able to do it unless you had one of the spiders with you," she smiled a bit. "It's voice recognition, so you'll have to give the PADD a sample and access code," she told him. "Ready voice recognition input," she commanded softly. "Sorg Jurell, level eight, authorization Booter-zulu-seven-omega-one." A ready light blinked in the corner of the PADD's screen and she handed it to Jurell.

He gave the PADD a voice sample and his authorization code and passed it back. "I'll leave you to work on that," he said. "I'll get busy with a few things," he pointed at her room terminal. "Okay?"

Caly looked over to where he was pointing and nodded. "But... You might want to rethink using it," she offered with a wan smile, the haunted look filtering back into her eyes. "I'd imagine they're scanning it pretty heavily after the Probe thing. I haven't touched it since then. When I'm finished I'll show you how to get through my security stuff." She tapped the PADD and then frowned in thought as she looked around her quarters. "I wouldn't be surprised if we weren't being bugged," she offered quietly, her voice deadly serious.

"If that's the case, we're already done for," he said seriously. "I doubt it. I think Crix was dealt with before he passed on anything. Besides, not touching your terminal would be suspicious, don't worry I'm not doing anything suspicious anyway." He grinned and left her to it.

"It's not Crix I was worried about," she pointed out, watching him. "It's the other one... Hadek. Crix was just an engineer with a cruel, sadistic mind. Everyone on the ship knows. You think Hadek doesn't? Or that he's not watching? He'd be stupid not to..." she pointed out and blinked at what she saw on her PADD. "Holy shit... The spiders got your collar frequency." She looked over at him. "They recorded a multitude of uses so they have it down pat...."

Jurell grinned. "That's one problem down."

---

"What a Tangled Web We Weave..."
By: CPO Calyca Boothroyd, Engineering Crewchief

Location: USS Sulu, Boothroyd's quarters
Stardate: 57910.20, 18h00

***

She'd been working fairly steadily for some time... Or trying to, rather. She'd had frequent pauses to brew more tea, or pace, or to blatantly lean over Jurell's shoulder to see what he was doing. She'd even taken several showers. She was restless, her body slightly agitated, her hyperactivity at an annoying high. It happened sometimes, but not like this. The jolt to her nervous system yesterday hadn't helped and she was finding that the normal things she did to combat it weren't very effective.

She was bothered greatly by Shyla's death. By the utter senseless brutality of it. Even losing herself in work couldn't keep the stray images from popping unbidden into her mind, or the stark panic from gripping her insides. So far she'd been successful in maintaining control and had gone through the Periodic Table a half dozen times in order to do it.

At one point, and after her stomach had made itself known rather loudly several times, she'd begged Jurell to get them something to eat, threatening to go herself if he didn't. He did, of course. Which was where he was now, his absence making her acutely aware of just how alone and vulnerable she was. Something that had never before occurred to her. She was getting cranky again. She could feel it. It always happened when she went too long without food. Only now it was aggravated by the emotional stress she was under. She didn't have the coping skills for dealing with what she'd witnessed, and she was having to flounder her way through it. Sorg's simple presence in her quarters helped. He didn't hover, he didn't bug her, he didn't want to talk all the time, he didn't need fixing and he didn't try to fix her. He was just quietly there, watching her when she'd become agitated, his blue eyes filled with worry as they tracked her rambling progress around the room.

She plopped back down onto the sofa and picked up her PADD, her eyes going over the compiled sub-routines and each of the spider's acknowledgement that they'd been successfully integrated. That done, she moved to studying the frequencies used for the collar activations. There were numerous recordings that spanned a definite range, a phenomenon she attributed to the different intensity levels. Caly idly wondered who the collar had been used on as nearly all the recent recordings originated from the same spider. There was a light smattering of recordings from the other spiders, which gave her a good picture of the frequency range. If they extended it a bit to cover a broader range, they should be safe in assuming they could block all the collars.

Jurell wanted to adjust the comm badges of those people who were wearing collars. Not an impossible task, but a dangerous and time consuming one. If they got caught even altering one... But they could be careful. It wasn't like everyone didn't know the danger and the risks involved with taking the ship back. She'd let him handle the logistics though, tactical stuff was not her area of expertise. But she could work on the technical side. Now... Perhaps if they just tweaked the transmitter side of the transceiver to emit the right jamming frequency... Poof, no more collars. It wouldn't take care of the pain-sticks, but Jurell had told her he didn't think they needed to worry about "hand weapons", and Shirik was working on a way to disable them anyway.

Thinking of Shiri made her wonder where her friend was and if she was okay. Caly had a policy that no news was good news and until she heard differently, she'd just make the assumption that everything was fine. She really couldn't do anything else. Worrying about things you had no control over was a waste of energy. She knew that eventually she'd touch bases with her, and that was enough. For now, she had bigger and more important things to set her focus on.

She frowned in thought as she futzed with the frequency problem. She really needed a comm tech... They breathed frequencies, didn't they? Like she did schematics? She needed Mouse... This was more his area of expertise than hers. She'd contact him when she could, when she thought it was safe... In the meantime she ran diagnostics on the spiders and recent additions to their AI, and copied the program in the guise of a Security Maintenance Log to an Isolinear chip for Jurell to use in his PADD just in case something happened to her and she couldn't trigger the spiders to activate the gas canisters herself.... After all... Backups were good...

---

"Jammers"
By: Ensign Roades Mouazer, Communications Officer
CPO Calyca Boothroyd, Engineering Crewchief

Location: USS Sulu, Mouazer & Marp's Quarters
Stardate: 57910.20 18h33

***

She'd made very little progress on the collar problem. Just when she thought she had the right jamming frequency, one of the triggering frequencies would sneak through. This was out of her realm of expertise and Caly finally sought out the help she needed.

"Boothroyd to Mouazer," Caly called over the comm. She'd have to be careful because she knew they were monitoring communications.

"Mouazer here, what do you need, Boothroyd?" Mouse asked.

"Do you have a minute, sir? I'm working on a report and I need to go over a couple of the repair logs with you," she responded.

"Always, if you need me I'm in my Quarters," he replied back, looking up from the Bass guitar nestled in his lap. Lazily he strummed his fingers down the strings.

"Thank you, sir. I'll be right there." She checked the location of his quarters, gathered a PADD, and left a message for Jurell before exiting her own quarters and making her way to his.

It didn't take Caly long to get there. She was careful not to draw attention to herself and soon enough she was activating the chime outside Mouazer's door. She was dressed in an old training uniform and still a bit on the pale side. There were dusky smudges under her eyes and they still held a slightly haunted look.

Mouse looked up as heard the chime to his Quarters ring, setting his guitar off to the side he stood to his feet and called out, "Come," as he went to the Replicator to help himself to a Malt. His current attire consisted of a dark shirt with various tourdates from bands that played at various Ozzfest revivals on the back, a pair of khaki shorts completed the outfit.

Caly stepped into the room as soon as the door opened. She looked around briefly before advancing a bit further and turning to settle wide green eyes on Mouse. "Thank you for seeing me, sir... I have this project I need your help on," she told him, getting right down to business.

Stopping as he reached the replicator, Mouse snapped his fingers as he instantly recalled the fact that the Replicators were all offline. Turning to face Caly he put his hands in his pockets as he walked towards her. "Something tells me you aren't here for duty related issues, are you?"

"Uhh... No, sir," she smiled a little, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Not precisely..." She lifted her hand to tug absently at the control collar she wore and to scratch the skin underneath. "It's about neutralizing these..." she told him and tapped the collar. "So that when the time comes, the Enforcers can't use them to keep everyone in line."

"Ah, gotcha. Come here and let me take a look at the collar up close." Standing next to Caly, Mouse studied the collar as he looked over its design. "Have you scanned it over with a tricorder to try and see if you could figure out the inner structure of the collar itself?"

"Aye, sir." She tipped her head out of the way to let him look. "It's tamper-proof. Or if you do tamper with it, it'll blow up," she told him in a rather conversational tone. "But we did devise a way to neutralize them. Which is where you come in." She glanced up at him. "We've managed to capture a fair number of instances where the collars were remotely triggered. There's a range of frequencies used and I assume that has to do with the strength. What we need is a jamming frequency, sir...that can be programmed into the comm badge's transceivers." She looked up at him hopefully.

"I never pass up a challenge," he remarked, patting her shoulder reassuringly. "What else can you tell me about the collars? Any other information you give me can help me to devise a way so I can jam these collars up like drawing bugs straight into a bug zapper, or something to that effect...say make them as effective as two tin cans attached via string," he added lamely.

She gave him a wan smile. "Basically the only way to get one off outside of them taking it off, is to die. It's coded to the wearer... To their life signs and their DNA. They're molecular bonded. They have no seams and are shielded against tampering Dr. Sefton did a complete scan," she explained quietly. "I have the frequencies here..." She tapped her PADD. "And we need to be very careful... If we're found out...." She shuddered and the haunted look in her eyes deepened. The panic tried to rise up and she had to take a moment to squash it down. "And time is of the essence. Once you figure out the proper frequency, then we have to alter the comm badges...."

"I'll see what I can do. I'll discuss this with Ensign Farrell to see that we can alter the comm badges. It'll take me a bit of time to figure out the proper frequency though." Mouazer took the PADD from Calyca, overlooking the information. "I'll get back to you on this ASAP, okay?"

"Aye, sir," Caly nodded and handed him an isolinear chip in exchange for her PADD. "A copy of the information's on here, sir," she told him quietly. "I don't think I should be seen leaving without my PADD." She offered a tight smile and altered the communication repair file they'd been looking at before offering it to him. "If you could just authorize this file change, sir?" she asked. She knew she was being over cautious, but she'd already had one of the guards stop her and access her PADD and the files on it.

"Sure." Tapping a few buttons on the PADD, Mouse authorized the file. "There you go. If the guards give you Hell, tell them to direct their complaints to me...er on second thought, maybe not. Just be careful."

Caly gave him wry smile and nodded. "I will. Thank you, sir." After a moment's hesitation, she slipped from his quarters and headed back to her own, confident that the collar jamming problem was in good hands now.

---

"Hanging On and Holding Up"
By: Lt. Commander Damhnait Sefton - Chief Medical Officer
CPO Calyca Boothroyd - Engineering Crewchief

Location: USS Sulu, Boothroyd's Quarters
Stardate: 57910.20, 20h30

***

She'd already taken several showers since returning from seeing Ensign Mouazer. Not to say that seeing him made her feel dirty, because it hadn't. She'd felt dirty since the incident in the Probe hold and no matter how many times she showered, it wasn't long till she could feel Shyla's blood splattering on her and would find herself in the shower once again. Carbon, atomic number 6, symbol 'C'... Maybe when the Enforcers were dealt with and she could see them all neutralized... Maybe then she could feel clean again. ... Oxidation states, 2, 4, -4.... Carbon, an element of prehistoric discovery, is very widely distributed in nature. It is found in abundance in the sun, stars, comets, and atmospheres....

She was alone again and acutely aware of the fact. Not that she could blame Jurell; he did have things that needed doing... As a matter of fact, as much as she wanted him there, as much as his presence gave her some measure of peace...some feeling of safety... At the same time, and for some perverse reason she didn't understand... She wanted him gone. Yet when he was, she felt vulnerable and twitchy... ...In 1969 a new allotropic form of carbon was produced during the sublimation of pyrolytic graphite at low pressures. Under free-vaporization conditions...

The petite engineer was managing to maintain her grip though... Perhaps just barely, but she was managing. She paced around the room as she worked on the PADD in her hands. She was barefoot, dressed in drawstring Capri pants and a short waisted tank top. There were dark smudges under haunted green eyes and her hair had been hastily combed through with trembling fingers.

The doorchime sounded once, making the woman inside jump and look around with startled eyes. When Calyca asked, the computer informed her that Doctor Damhnait Sefton was the only one awaiting her in the corridor. She visibly relaxed then and spoke a quiet, "Enter..." as she stopped pacing and faced the door, clutching the PADD to her chest.

"Hello, Calyca," Damhnait stated warmly, once the doors were retracted from sight. She was dressed in her class A uniform, and shouldered a medical kit. "May I come in?"

"Of course, Ma'am..." Caly waved for her to enter, watching the doorway until it finally closed behind the doctor and she could take a steadying breath again to fight back the panic that had threatened to rise. ... Atomic number 7, symbol 'N', weight 14.00674... "Would you care to sit down?" She motioned to the sofa, waiting to see if the other woman would sit before she did. She was nervous, agitated, and lifted a hand to scratch at the reddened area under the collar around her neck.

With a polite nod, Sefton seated herself on the sofa, but watched Caly's scratching during the process. Her voice still calm, despite the concern evident in her eyes, Damhnait asked her, "Has the ointment lost its effectiveness?"

Caly blinked and looked momentarily confused by the question. "Oh... No ma'am, I don't think so," she offered as she sat down next to her, perching on the edge of the cushion, looking like she was ready to bolt at a moment's notice. "It's not irritated so much as the feel of the collar.. bothers me..." she offered sheepishly. ...Oxygen, atomic number 8, symbol 'O', weight 15.9994... "So I scratch it..."

"I know everyone would like to give you the time and space and energy that you need to heal, but I need to know how you're doing. Right now," Damhnait requested with gentle weight, and didn't bother to pull her tricorder from its indenture on the medkit casing. In a lighthearted mockery of what a threat should be, Sefton told her, "And remember: I'll know if you're lying."

She opened her mouth to speak and then closed it again, offering Sefton a wan smile before drawing in a calming breath. "I won't lie to you," she told her truthfully. "I'm doing the best I can and having to improvise my normal coping skills to do it," she told her. "I'm having panic attacks, suffering from irrational bouts of fear, tearing up at a moment's notice, paranoid, headaches, nightmares, and my hyperactivity is at an all time high. And I think I've taken six showers today already." She didn't hold anything back, nor did she have any desire to. "But I'm managing. And I can manage until we get out of here. After that... I think maybe I'll just have a quiet nervous breakdown."

"You won't have a nervous breakdown," Damhnait told her in absolute certainty. "That would be too convenient; a nice break without having to give up shore leave time." Sefton took a beat to let her genial smile give way to seriousness. "I appreciate what you tried to do in Sickbay today. You managed well, but are you sure you want to manage tomorrow? You could choose to spend your time however you would like. I can make it so they won't expect you in Engineering tomorrow."

Caly finally sat back, seemingly relaxed a bit, even though one leg jiggled slightly as a testament to her hyperactivity. "Thank you, ma'am," she smiled faintly at the compliment. "Perhaps my time would be better spent preparing for our arrival at the Gate," she mused. "But I don't want to do anything to draw attention to myself... And I'm not sure how close they're watching me. If I was them... I'd be watching me pretty closely after the incident in the Probe hold," she admitted, and had to fight back a flash of panic at the mere mention of it.

"That would be a wise thing to do," Sefton nodded, referring to the decisions of both Caly and the Enforcers. Giving into her training, Sefton palmed her Mark XI tricorder, and ran a general medical scan of Boothroyd.

"Yeah... I feel like I'm being constantly watched," she admitted. "Even now." She gave Sefton another wan smile as she let her scan away. All her physical injuries had been healed when she'd been brought into Sickbay. There was a little residual bruising to her shoulder that would go away in time, and her nervous system was a little more hyperactive than normal. "Makes it hard to plan anything without feeling extremely paranoid though. Luckily I'm just in the doing mode and not the planning one." She watched Sefton's face as she ran the tricorder over her.

"Paranoia appears to be the only means to survival in this quantum universe." Sefton posited, "That is the only way we can get home: by trusting our fellow officers to do what's right, while our watchers from the Empire are too busy watching that their own backs don't collide with their colleagues' blades."

Caly looked hesitant, slightly unsure, and a bit paranoid. She even looked around the room as if someone might be watching them. "Aye, ma'am... Then why are we putting so much blind faith in one of their trusted officers? Why am I scared to death because my life is being put in the hands of one of...of them by my fellow officers whether I want it to be or not?" She was getting agitated and her stomach was churning. She drew in a breath and let it out in an effort to quell the rising panic... Magnesium, atomic number 12, symbol 'Mg', weight.... "I trust most of my officers, ma'am," she assured her, the panic subsiding. "But from where I'm sitting... Either the captain of the Windsor and all her senior officers are fools, ma'am... Or we are..."

Her voice thick with darkness, Damhnait suggested, "Commander Bancroft is allowed to freely perform her duty on this ship to the same degree that we are. Commander T'Kal aside, I believe our crew affords Bancroft as much trust and faith as the Enforcers afford us. Her estimated usefulness to us at the Gate will decide if she is dosed with immunity to the anesthezine gas or simply dosed with the placebo and locked up with the Enforcers."

Caly stared at her, the fingers of one hand began to draw faint, abstract patterns in the air as she tried to work out if she'd just been chastized, or agreed with. In the end, right or wrong, she decided that the Chief Medical Officer cautiously agreed with her... "Who makes that decision, ma'am? Commander T'Kal?" she asked quietly, her tone and thoughts clearly not holding the same trust in his judgment as she did in the rest of the Senior Staff.

"Ultimately, the decision is left with me, since I will be personally medicating the bridge staff," Sefton admitted soberly. "I will be consulting with the senior staff, of course, and will follow any orders given by Commander Lyrr."

Caly nodded and her mind raced... How influenced was Lyrr by T'Kal's judgement? The question clearly bothered her. Finally she offered a quiet and sincere, "I trust your judgement, ma'am..." Because it would be very difficult if not impossible to pull the wool over the eyes of a telepath.

"I appreciate that," Damhnait replied, just as softly. Sefton put away her tricorder, as it became apparent that there was nothing she could do for Caly from a medical perspective.

The engineer smiled a little, a gesture that didn't quite reach her eyes. "Thank you for coming by, ma'am... It heartens me to know that we haven't fallen through the cracks." The smile increased a bit. "I'll be ready for the gas release and the away mission, never fear. Ensign Farrell already came by and checked on me to make sure I'd be able to do my part..." she assured her.

"It is gladdening to hear that, but stay safe above all else," Damhnait entreated, and squeezed Caly's shoulder with a quick but comforting grip. As she stood, she said, "I need to check in on Cristobel."

Caly chewed on her bottom lip a bit. "I'd ask you to express my concern for him, but I believe he'd be...bothered by it," she smiled faintly. "I'm staying as safe as I can, ma'am. Sorg Jurell's been staying with me... I think he believes he could be a buffer if anything happened..." It was clear she didn't believe the same thing. She stood as Damhnait did, clutching the PADD to her chest. "You be safe, ma'am... We need our senior officers to be there for us."

"We're doing all we can," Sefton lied, considering the troubling rumours she'd heard about Tagliesh, Enforcers, Bancroft and T'Kal. Damhnait let herself out, feeling utterly resolved to speak with Commander Lyrr in the morning to turn her lie into a truth.

---

"Plans Of Mice & Men"
By: Crewman Emma Summers

Location: Emma's Quarters, USS Sulu
Stardate: 57910.20 23h36

***

The room was dark. Starlight was blacked out. The bed was rumpled and Emma Summers lay in its centre curled in a tight ball, still in her Starfleet issue underwear and arms wrapped around her knees.

Emma had run from the Sickbay and been sick from the shock of seeing Tebrianne Bancroft. The last time she had seen Tebrianne had been on the USS Galaxy just before Cathy Page had run from Starfleet with Benedict's baby still unborn. She had left a surprise package as part of the woman's holodeck recreation - a trap that would kill her. Unfortunately both Tebrianne and Benedict had been transferred off the ship to the USS Windsor before she had used it.

Cathy had heard that Bancroft had died. Ripped apart in an explosion on a remote mining colony, the fate of the Chief Helm officer of the Windsor had been a cause for celebration. It had worked out for the best after all. It had taken five long years to prepare for her new identity as Emma Summers. At least a new identity, as the hapless girl had been chosen for the assignment she had been given coming out of Starfleet Medical Academy. It had taken a lot of money and a lot of contacts to arrange for the girl's disappearance and Cathy's subsequent reincarnation of the girl. It had been painful losing her old self and getting the new body shape and the grafted DNA.

So close to Benedict now, and she had found him involved with another woman. Once again the man of her dark dreams was in love with someone else. Lyrr Tayla! Well, Cathy/Emma had her number! The Lyrr Virus still awaited her in a perfume spray tucked away in a safe place. It would act on her body like a fast acting acid and eat away her lungs and her organs in a matter of days and there would be no cure. The virus from JJ324c had been significantly altered to match the characteristics of a level five bioagent with triggers that would only recognise a specific DNA pattern: Lyrr Tayla.

Now it seemed that her careful planning was all for nothing!! Lyrr had been set aside just as Cathy Page had been set aside! In favor of the Mind Witch!! Tebrianne Bancroft, the Romulan She-Devil with the bewitching eyes and the beauty that even made Emma Summers envious.

Now she had another chance to kill the bitch. How to do it though? She already had a means to get Shirik Lektar's dagger. Using that signature blade on Lyrr had been the back-up plan. If she failed to use the perfume then Emma could slay her with the blade and leave it to blame Shirik - another suitor for Benedict taken out of the picture. It was no accident that Emma had also chosen Shirik's blood to create the virus. Her DNA was part of the virus and the food source upon which it fed. It would indicate Shirik Lektar had used her own blood to manufacture the virus. Even the computer and lab space that Emma had used had been meticulously swept of her own DNA and traces of Shirik's had been left there. Hair, dead skin, no finger prints though; that would be too easy.

The shift into the Alternate Universe had stalled her plans. Now Emma was approaching panic, as she saw a repeat of old times. She was pregnant, and if she had any hopes of using the unborn child to her advantage it would have to be soon. The brew that she had managed to procure would only work between a certain time frame, and it was special, as it did not appear to be a substance that had that kind of affect. A medical scan would not reveal the substance as the cause of the trauma - and it would have been attributed clearly to the trauma of her planned rape. Now that was in jeopardy as all weapons on the ship had been secured, including the Klingon weapon she had in her quarters to use for the attack on T'Kal.

She had to get rid of the baby. The last thing she wanted was another brat. She briefly considered her son, the boy would be just turned five now and living in the home of his foster parents. The thought gave Emma Summers a broad grin. The best of revenges on Benedict; the boy was being cared for by Cardassian parents! Brought up to hate his own real father! Sweet justice!

But what could she do now? How could she get Tebrianne killed? Benedict was under her spell again, and she wanted to free him...and maybe she might even have a second chance herself? It was the first time she'd considered that...not killing him. With Lyrr dead, Shirik blamed after she'd been found dead as a suicide...and Tebrianne. Always Tebrianne....

---