"The Morning After...?"
By: Lt. Benedict T'Kal - Chief of Security
Commander Lyrr Tayla - First Officer

Location: Holodeck 2, USS Sulu
Stardate 57907.18, 06h30

***

Benedict dived and caught the ball on his glove, smashing it with a savage back-hand. He rolled and came to his feet in a fluid motion as Lyrr Tayla leapt for the rebound. It was the second game of the morning, and Benedict had lost the first game, and was barely keeping ahead in the second. He crouched as Tayla hammered the ball for one of her drop shots. Her athletic body was clad in a skin tight Springball outfit, and he tried in vain not to watch her 'bounce.' It was most distracting!

He grinned as he side-stepped into the shot, anticipating its upward angle and fisting it into an almost straight arc at the target. His martial arts expertise set him in good stead for playing this traditional Bajoran game, as well as his years of playing it on Bajor. Tayla was better than him at the game, because she knew all the trick shots, whereas he was more powerful in his returns and his reflexes allowed him an edge.

Benedict was clad in his black uniform, with diagonal golden stripes that cut across his body in a tiger pattern. It was also figure hugging and left no room for the imagination as to the muscular nature of his perfectly proportioned body. His black hair was pulled away from his face and clipped behind him in a pony-tail. It whipped around as he played.

Just as it fell back into place against his nape, Lyrr set it in motion again when she intentionally backed into T'Kal to avoid the ball as it cut in close towards her. Her slight weight moving rapidly provided enough power and momentum to drive him back a good distance. She was too intent upon returning T'Kal's forehand shot to relish in their bodies pressed so close even if she'd wanted to; instead, she used the leverage his sturdy, solid frame offered to push off and sprint towards the rushing ball. Lyrr swung her arm forward and caught the ball as it started its downwards plummet. She pivoted into the forehand after striking to come about on the opposite side, in view of T'Kal. Lyrr found just enough time to give him a challenging smile as the ball made it back towards the wall, then she dropped into a low crouch and prepared to lunge at him once he began his return.

The first game had been 'stand-offish' - there had been some civility in the manner of play - but this game, Tayla had relaxed in one way and grown more feral in another. She thought nothing of using her body to block his shots, block his line of sight to the ball and generally play physical 'hard-ball.' When she backed into him it was to put his concentration off-balance as well as his body.

He grinned at her - she was using every dirty trick she knew. In a way he felt relieved; she was relaxed enough to not worry about his sensibilities and just play the game, and she felt threatened enough to use these tactics on him, but he'd held back considerably on the style of play she obviously enjoyed. He'd studiously avoided doing to her what she was so intent to do to him. It made the game a little one-sided, but he was not going to try to explain to the medical staff why the First Officer of the Sulu needed fixing up on account of him playing too rough. So he stoically took the punishment she was delivering almost gleefully. His leg was fine - that had been one concern before starting the game; it seemed solid enough and he felt no residual tightening of the muscles after the extensive repair job done on Risa.

Tayla played like he'd imagined. Hard and fast and full of inner strength. A part of his mind wondered whether she would be the same at other pursuits, the part of his mind that followed her movements and taunted him with visions of her naked and standing beneath a shower. He growled savagely as he slammed the ball - and this time he was prepared for her lunging toward the shot as he took a leap sideways to avoid her.

She stumbled past him as the body she'd expected to rebound off of wasn't there. Lyrr regained her balance, but her momentum was thrown off, still going forward instead of pushing her backwards to return the ball. She kicked out her foot as the wall rushed forward and pushed off from it. The ball was dropping for its second bounce and Lyrr dashed for it, but it was running out of air time and there was no way she was letting it touch the ground. With a grunt she launched herself at it with arm fully extended and her body in a dive. There wasn't time to emit a curse as the ball touched down and bounced away on an errant trajectory, but there was a split second available for Lyrr to curl in on herself and roll into the fall. The program beeped as T'Kal's point registered and Lyrr landed in a sitting position facing away from him. Now, she did curse in Bajoran as she tugged off her glove and tossed it against the facing wall. "Should've seen it coming!" she chided herself.

"True," he nodded with a smirk. "I win," he grinned as he removed his glove. "That's one all, and time for breakfast." He walked by her and looked down as she leaned back on her hands. "Good game." For a moment he held her eyes and where before it had caused her some difficulty with their shared attraction, now there was no hint of it. He smiled. "I'll meet you in the mess hall - I need a shower."

Lyrr sighed and nodded grudgingly. "I'll beat you again tomorrow," she told him confidently. Smiling smugly, she pushed onto her feet and dusted off invisible particles from her backside. "You got lucky."

He pointedly ignored looking at what she was doing, and instead laughed and shook his head. "Now I know how you play," he wagged a finger at her. "I'll be wearing Security Armour...." He grinned and addressed the computer to end the holodeck program of the Springball court.

As he walked to the Arch and the doors opened he cast a glance over his shoulder at her. "See you in fifteen." With that he sauntered out of the holodeck and nodded politely at the ensign who was leaning against the wall waiting for her turn. She was dressed in running gear and as he walked past her she gave him a smile and watched him walk away. She didn't notice Lyrr until the First Officer was next to her.

"Ensign, it's all yours," Lyrr said with a smirk. When the girl's eyes shifted towards Lyrr, the First Officer glanced briefly at T'Kal turning a corner, then back. "The holodeck," she explained to the woman pointedly. "The holodeck, Ensign." And leaving the girl flustered, Lyrr made for her own quarters.

It was only fifteen minutes later, as T'Kal had predicted, that Lyrr was strolling towards the Security chief's quarters. As her hand reached for the console, the doors parted to reveal Lt. T'Kal in uniform and looking refreshed. She returned her hand to the other behind her back and clasped both. "You aren't planning on breakfast in the mess hall, are you, Lieutenant?" was her immediate question, but a smile was creeping onto her lips. It was always the case when T'Kal stared at her as intently as he was now. "I've found it far too loud for my liking," she continued. "And I've found, for some reason, that Sikara's food disagrees with my stomach."

Benedict briefly considered pointing out that two senior officers on Alpha shift sharing breakfast in a very public place was quite appropriate - rather than in personal quarters where assumptions could be made. But she had that look in her eyes that told him not to argue. He stood aside and waved her in. "Of course, Commander," he said politely. She passed him smelling of soap and he smiled. The mention of Sikara grated. He'd spent a tiring hour talking to Risan authorities when he'd returned to his quarters after a very fast inspection of the Armoury. As a result he'd had three hours sleep. He felt oddly invigorated though.

He followed her in and moved over to the replicator as she took a seat on the cushion by his low table. As usual he wore the SOB uniform, its black suited him and so did its protective qualities. "I'd like to talk to you about that..." he said off-handedly. "Sikara," he said neutrally. "What would you like?" He gave her a smile as he prepared to order breakfast.

"A vola berry fritter and a tea, please," she answered, then shifted her focus to his initial question. "What about Sikara? The final decision to allow him on board was Captain Salinger's. If it had been mine, I would not have allowed it."

He ordered breakfast for them both and waited until the tray materialised with the dishes. He chose a pot of Japanese Green Tea for two, and Jo'Prit, a Bajoran cereal cake with honey and nuts that steamed as he carried it to the table. He sat and arranged the dishes before them before he looked up and tackled her response.

"I know," he began, nodding. "I agree - the decision is the captain's and it was totally inappropriate for the Counsellor to have pre-empted any discussion on the matter. Especially in front of the man." He poured some tea into her cup and gave her a smile to show that he wasn't disagreeing with her. "You wouldn't have allowed it because it was Farrell's idea - or the Counsellor's?" he asked.

Lyrr watched the steaming liquid settle in her cup and smiled wryly. He certainly enjoyed analyzing her; she appreciated it not in the least. "I wouldn't have allowed it because we hardly know this man or his past, or his true intentions. It was a matter of trust, and he does not have mine." She regarded T'Kal with a tight smile. "Satisfied?"

"No." He noted her obvious irritation. "But I agree that the necessary security clearance needed to be done before any thought to him coming aboard was made. Sikara really isn't the issue." He took a sip, savouring the taste. "You have a problem with Farrell." He said it flatly - it wasn't a question. He looked into her eyes to show her that he meant no disrespect, nor was he trying to be difficult.

"It was obvious last night for all to see. For some reason he makes you angry, and I think that any suggestion he makes would be cast aside - as it was last night, regardless of its merit." He kept his voice even and soft, trying to dissuade her anger at his observations. "As I said - what happened last night was regrettable. The Counsellor was wrong in raising the issue at dinner - she was correct that a chef with Sikara's skills would be a boost for morale while we are in the Gamma Quadrant, but all good intentions aside - it was done incorrectly. She should have gone to you first perhaps to 'suggest' such a thing. Not in front of the senior crew. Not in front of Sikara - an innocent man who prepared a dinner that brought such a wonderful smile to your face." He held her eyes and smiled himself. "I really liked that smile..."

Lyrr sighed and looked down into her cup to conceal the slight colouring of her cheeks.

"I did a security check on Sikara after we talked," T'Kal continued. "The man is a native Risan, no record of anything illegal or out of the ordinary, he's well known for his culinary talents but struggled never the less making it - there's a fair bit of competition on Risa. I checked him out to four generations, he's clean." He took another sip of tea and held her eyes.

"I believe that," she answered. "Especially coming from you. But it's the fact that he's an associate of Ensign Farrell." She gripped her cup tightly, drawing out her anger into the shaped porcelain. "He seems to breed dissention and rebellion wherever he goes or whomever he speaks to. I saw that firsthand with Ensign Gui at dinner. She publicly undermined me, Ben. I only wonder what this Sikara man will become if he continues his association with Ensign Farrell, or if he's already too far gone." Lyrr sighed and pushed her tongue into her cheek as she paused a moment to review what she'd just said, and noted how mildly insane she sounded. "I know this isn't a conspiracy," she said quietly. "But I think one Ensign Farrell is enough."

Benedict smiled and nodded. "I had a brief conversation with him in the Risan hospital. I don't want to know what the issues are - but I think you're painting everyone with the same brush unnecessarily. Sikara isn't an associate - there hasn't been time for that. He is what he is - a cook." Benedict shook his head. "You know if Gui hadn't spoken when she did - I would have." When she looked at him he went on, "Not in the same way perhaps," he smiled, "but the poor man was standing there being humiliated after he'd cooked such a wonderful meal. I think you place too much emphasis on Farrell. Let Lieutenant Sam deal with him - let the chain of command do what it's supposed to. If you dislike the man that much." He broke a piece of the breakfast cake and the aroma drifted up - sweet and immediately mouth watering. "You're the XO, Tayla, you should let the department heads deal with their own discipline problems. Farrell may be rough around the edges as a Starfleet Officer, but the man has guts - and adaptability. I don't know him personally, but he put his life on the line on Risa for the sake of the mission. Don't ignore that. You're seeing his faults and dismissing his strengths - regardless of whatever he did to upset you." He saw by the expression and the tension in her hands that whatever Farrell had done was intensely personal.

"Ben," she said slowly, stiffly, "I don't want to sound disrespectful...but you don't know anything about Ensign Farrell or my gripe with him. He's crude, impudent, he has no knowledge whatsoever of what it takes to be a Starfleet officer, and above all else, he believes my authority is meaningless and that he can say and do as he pleases because of that. I won't have him insulting me to my face, or wittingly breaking the rules because he doesn't think the Starfleet code of conduct applies to him." Lyrr cleared her throat and shifted atop her cushion as she added tersely, "You don't know the half of it, Ben, so don't you dare tell me I've erred in my treatment of him."

He looked across the table at her, weighing the meaning behind her words and a moment later he nodded. "You're right - I don't know." He shrugged, and frowned, his disapproval showing briefly. "If he insulted you he deserves everything he gets - if he breaks the rules then he needs to be disciplined." He smiled again. "Relax - all I'm saying is that last night there was public fall-out from it - everyone could see you had issues with Farrell. I just don't like the fact that Sikara is paying for that - the man deserved better than he got last night. He lost face - that's hard for anyone to take." He sighed, "I had a few terse words for Scott last night about it. I would have thought that a senior counsellor would know better!"

Lyrr leaned forward, wearing an accusatory smile. "And an executive officer, correct?"

"I'm not saying what you said last night was incorrect, Tayla." He grew serious. "Don't misinterpret my intention - you are the XO - my commanding officer. What you say and how you say it is up to you. How you deal with Farrell is up to you. He's not my problem - he's Sam's. But the more you show open hostility to the man, the more he's likely to buck authority. If his intention is to get under your skin then it's working - and the only person who'll suffer is you if you let your emotions show as you did last night." He ate some of the cake - giving in to hunger.

"So I should suppress them?" she surmised. Then, she smiled. "Okay...I understand your concerns, but I need to show at least some authority or I'd be ineffective as Executive officer of this vessel." Catching his gaze as he looked up from his meal, Lyrr added earnestly, "Though, thank you for being frank with me. Aside from Ensign Farrell's direct reproaches of my abilities, you're the only one who's taken the time to truly discuss how I come across. And from what I can tell, it isn't pleasant."

Benedict grinned and nodded. "You can show all the authority you need to, Tayla - you do. I don't hear anything 'bad' about you - in fact the opposite is true. You're damned good - otherwise you wouldn't be the XO - and Salinger wouldn't trust you as much as he does. I'd just hate to think anyone was putting you in the same context as Xayella Tagliesh - now that's a woman who's got a reputation for her emotional reactions." He grinned and held her gaze again. "I'll always be frank with you - personally and professionally. Sometimes I might say what I think and immediately regret it," he grinned, "but I will always say what I think. There's no falseness in friendship...or anything else...with me."

"Good," Lyrr replied with a curt nod. "Because there's something I've been meaning to ask you for a time." The tone of her words, and the mood projecting from her tense features alluded to the seriousness of the matter and the difficulty for her in broaching it. "I don't want this leaving the room, T'Kal...but I have to know." She cleared her throat gently as her eyes stared into the reflective pool of tea in her cup. This wasn't a subject she'd ever discussed with anyone, and as brave as she believed she was, Lyrr didn't know how far she would get before bolting. She couldn't let it be, though, until she knew the truth. "There've been times when you've mentioned my past...as if you have some solid knowledge regarding it, as if you know things no one else knows." Lyrr hesitantly glanced up at him, and found she was able to hold his gaze. "Ben," she said quietly, "what do you know about me, about what happened during the Occupation? I...I have to know this. It's important."

He put down the morsel of cake he'd been about to eat and looked at her. All humor left his eyes, but his features softened. "I don't know anything that I haven't seen," he said. "You bear the scars - and you have the look in your eyes that I've seen too many times. I don't need to know the details of what they did to you...I know what they did - how they did it... So many went through the tortures, the rapes, the degradation and humiliation. Most died - and the ones that didn't had that haunted look in their eyes I've seen in yours. The look that says the hurt is too deep to heal - too defiled to ever get clean." He had compassion in his eyes as he looked into her face. "They did those things to my mother...she was a beautiful woman, Tayla - they had her for a long time. They did the same things to my wife..." He smiled sadly. "She was a lot like you...but she was Klingon - Alayessa T'Kal. I rescued her from a death camp. Some of the things I've seen...." His violet eyes were haunted by the memories. Children hung on hooks - women brutalised beyond recognition, experiments...

Tayla swallowed back the sickening bile rising in her throat, coming up with the memories. She crushed the fabric of her pantleg in a fist, and funnelled all her rage, and anguish, and shame there. It was all she could do to keep from displaying any emotion to T'Kal. "It wasn't anything like that for me," she lied quietly. "Those scars you saw...they were-- It was from battle. I was young when I joined the rebellion, hardly enough time to get into trouble." She chuckled weakly, then regarded T'Kal with a firm, hard stare. "Whatever you think happened to me, T'Kal, it didn't. And I'd prefer it if you thought nothing more of it."

He was staring into her eyes and the lie was evident. He'd seen it too many times. She seemed to forget that he'd seen her as she stared at herself in the mirror. The hate and the revulsion he had witnessed did not come from any battle. It was her first real lie to him. His silence was deafening. Benedict just stared at her. Held her eyes with his violet stare and she saw them change. She was trying to hide her emotion, but her shoulders trembled with the effort to hide the grip under the table. Her bearing was stiff, and her eyes betrayed her will. T'Kal had known many liars, cheats and scoundrels, and he knew a lie when he saw one. He'd be a very poor security chief if he couldn't. Lyrr herself had asked him to go with her to the Opai on the basis that he would be able to see a lie. In her face, in her eyes and in her spirit her lie was shouting at him. She could see it in his eyes. The way they changed, hardened.

When the silence reached a point where it became unbearable he could no longer look at her shame. He dropped his eyes and bowed his head slightly acknowledging her wishes. So the lie would stand between them.

Lyrr sighed inaudibly and her shoulders fell forward as she released the tension that had been mounting. "Thank you," she whispered, both knowing it was for the silent pact they'd forged. "I won't ask you for another thing again, Ben. Thank you."

She'd kept it hidden for so long that it was a caged beast inside of her. Benedict realised at that moment that he'd done the same thing. Only his beast was revenge. He'd held onto it - riding the tiger's tail until it would eventually turn on him. Lyrr would face the same crisis at some point. In order to heal she would have to let her beast go. She wasn't willing to. She truly thought that it was a part of her. A part she desperately didn't want anyone else to see. Benedict had seen it - in the hotel room. She knew it - and so did he. Now she had asked him to behave as if he had not seen her pain. Well...that was the Japanese way. He could well understand that - and he would live with it. Knowing that it would always be a wall that he could not climb. With his silent consent he had sealed any hope of that. It was her way of dealing with the shame; rather than taking her life in real terms, she took it in spirit.

He simply nodded. Taking his tea cup he swallowed a long draught of it. It was lukewarm now and he busied himself with pouring again for both of them. He used the time to compose his wa - the centre of his spirit. His breathing, his inner peace were calmed by the ritualised manner he poured the tea. One day he would perhaps perform the Tea Ceremony for her, as he'd done for Teb so long ago. One day. Perhaps. His own words came back to him - there are no falsehoods in friendship.

Once he had completed the pouring he could look up at her once again. He composed a smile and presented her cup in the Japanese way - one hand beneath the cup, the other balancing it by the brim. "To friendship," he said gently.

Lyrr mirrored the gesture, raising a questioning eyebrow at T'Kal to ask if she had done it properly. She wondered who he'd be teaching this to next. "To friendship and promises," Lyrr replied meaningfully, then brought the cup's brim to her lips. Her eyes, however, remained on T'Kal's, willing him to truly uphold his vow. She trusted him to - or rather, his traditions to demand he do so. Still, that gave Lyrr little comfort. "I should go," she told him as she set down her cup. "I have to get to the bridge."

He nodded. "I will be there shortly," he said as he replaced his cup and began tidying up. He was no longer hungry. They both had Bridge duty on Alpha this morning - at least until Salinger was completely fit for it. As she stood he remained and nodded for her to go.

She walked out of his quarters and he sat back on his heels, watching the blank doorway after it had closed. The image of her in his dream was in his mind again. He still didn't truly know what it meant. Was it a warning? He sighed, and closed his eyes, trying to make sense of everything.

After a while he looked up at Tebrianne's portrait and met her dark eyes again - as he did every day. He smiled at her, remembering what it had been like to be in love. Would he ever feel that again? He knew that it would never be the same. She was gone. It had been five years. He had to move on. He had to leave some things behind - his past was his past. Tebrianne was his past. He didn't know what his future held. That was the exciting part. The Sulu was off into a mission very similar to the Windsor - Benedict wasn't a believer in coincidence. It was Karma. He'd tried to remain to look for Marco - but that was going to be impossible now. It was a sign. Perhaps that was what the dreams were telling him. Break with the past. Was Lyrr Tayla a part of that past too?

Perhaps she was.

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